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08-26-2007, 01:47 PM
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Junior Member
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Join Date: Aug 2007
2 posts, read 5,096 times
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ADHD = Cheating ?
My wife has ADHD and she has strong changeable mood swings and another known symtoms for people with ADHD is to ignore details; makes careless mistakes.
I wonder if anyone has been experiencing this being a problem when it comes to being Faithful to your partner. Would be great if both parts could answer this question. The person with ADHD and the person that's being cheated on
-John
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08-26-2007, 02:21 PM
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Zen Warrior
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Timberon, NM (In the Sacramento Mountains)
5,522 posts, read 3,451,989 times
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I don't have adhd and I am not being cheated on but I don't think the adhd has anything to do with cheating on somebody. It's more likely called, not having any morals.
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08-26-2007, 04:11 PM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Vancouver, Canada
550 posts, read 753,695 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by John stanman
My wife has ADHD and she has strong changeable mood swings and another known symtoms for people with ADHD is to ignore details; makes careless mistakes.
I wonder if anyone has been experiencing this being a problem when it comes to being Faithful to your partner. Would be great if both parts could answer this question. The person with ADHD and the person that's being cheated on
-John
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My son is ADHD and I worry about future relationships. All I can do is keep him in counseling and raise him right. Cheating my be a tiny part of her ADHD if she wasn't dealt with in the appropriate manner as a child. Ie. counseling, life skills, a solid home life, involved family and school and at times medication. Being an adult with ADHD it is up to her to deal with it.
I have friends who are very happily married with 2 kids and the dad is ADHD. You can totally tell! but he is more faithful to his wife than anyone I know.
Is she a victim of circumstance? You would need to tell us a lot more about your relationship to concretely answer your question.
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08-26-2007, 04:53 PM
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Junior Member
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Join Date: Aug 2007
2 posts, read 5,096 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by skoe
My son is ADHD and I worry about future relationships. All I can do is keep him in counseling and raise him right. Cheating my be a tiny part of her ADHD if she wasn't dealt with in the appropriate manner as a child. Ie. counseling, life skills, a solid home life, involved family and school and at times medication. Being an adult with ADHD it is up to her to deal with it.
I have friends who are very happily married with 2 kids and the dad is ADHD. You can totally tell! but he is more faithful to his wife than anyone I know.
Is she a victim of circumstance? You would need to tell us a lot more about your relationship to concretely answer your question.
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Hello . Thank you so much for replying. I honestly don't have to much to stand on as far as saying that she's not being faithful. All these questions comes from me hearing from people that ADHD people can be easily attracted to other people because of their impulsitivity. ( I'm sorry i'm from holland so my english could be alittle funny)
After that i posted my first message in this forum i've been searching for other places on internet to see if i could find anything about this and i did. a few actually. The problem is that i only find it from forums with people who might be worried about the same thing as me without realy knowing. Is there anywhere i can read about this subject from some kind of Scientist or doctors words?
i'm sorry but me and my girlfriend is gonna have some time apart soon and i'm worried that our relationship will go under because of my worries.
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08-26-2007, 05:19 PM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: I don't even know..ask me in 6 months!
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I understand your concerns, but don't honestly believe having ADHD would be any excuse for cheating. Being impulsive doesn't mean not knowing right from wrong...
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08-26-2007, 05:42 PM
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Shar-Pei Advocate
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: NY-FL->half-back TN to someplace I dream of.....
5,884 posts, read 4,690,539 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by John stanman
My wife has ADHD and she has strong changeable mood swings and another known symtoms for people with ADHD is to ignore details; makes careless mistakes.
I wonder if anyone has been experiencing this being a problem when it comes to being Faithful to your partner. Would be great if both parts could answer this question. The person with ADHD and the person that's being cheated on
-John
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ADHD is no excuse for cheating. MY stbx has ADHD and uses the excuse that drinking helps him calm down...  If someone wants to get better , they go to a therapist, they don't buy a bottle of Jim Beam or cheat.
sunny
Last edited by dreamofmonterey; 08-26-2007 at 05:43 PM..
Reason: sp
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08-26-2007, 07:07 PM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: May 2007
1,127 posts, read 896,157 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sunnyhelena
ADHD is no excuse for cheating. MY stbx has ADHD and uses the excuse that drinking helps him calm down...  If someone wants to get better , they go to a therapist, they don't buy a bottle of Jim Beam or cheat.
sunny
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GOOD POINT.
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08-26-2007, 07:42 PM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: I don't even know..ask me in 6 months!
2,506 posts, read 1,451,244 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sunnyhelena
MY stbx has ADHD and uses the excuse that drinking helps him calm down...  If someone wants to get better , they go to a therapist, they don't buy a bottle of Jim Beam or cheat.
sunny
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Hmm, that sounds vaguely familiar. My brother had a drinking problem and he got a couple of DUIs, so he promised his wife he would stop drinking... Instead he started smoking(more) marijuana, so much he ended up with some sort of metabolic disorder. It got so he couldn't afford his meds because he didn't have health insurance, so he started drinking again because he said he couldn't sleep if he didn't.   What are people thinking???
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08-26-2007, 08:52 PM
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Shar-Pei Advocate
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: NY-FL->half-back TN to someplace I dream of.....
5,884 posts, read 4,690,539 times
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Men use the abuse excuse-
Quote:
Originally Posted by floridadreamer
Hmm, that sounds vaguely familiar. My brother had a drinking problem and he got a couple of DUIs, so he promised his wife he would stop drinking... Instead he started smoking(more) marijuana, so much he ended up with some sort of metabolic disorder. It got so he couldn't afford his meds because he didn't have health insurance, so he started drinking again because he said he couldn't sleep if he didn't.   What are people thinking???
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They dont like talking in therapy, and my dr. mentioned if they have ADHD or bipolar illness, they are more likely to drink or abuse drugs (if they never seek treatment) There is also some genetics involved-
My stbx has a brother that sounds exactly like yours (the man is 50 mind you) 2 divorces, failed marriages and kids without a father. If they get help early, take the meds they could be fine, but some just prefer to drink  .
Cheating and any other negative behavior is not to be tolerated, IMO.
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08-26-2007, 08:56 PM
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Senior Member
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: I don't even know..ask me in 6 months!
2,506 posts, read 1,451,244 times
Reputation: 812
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sunnyhelena
My stbx has a brother that sounds exactly like yours (the man is 50 mind you) 2 divorces, failed marriages and kids without a father. If they get help early, take the meds they could be fine, but some just prefer to drink  .
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IMO, my brothers wife is one of his problems...but she used to drink a lot too. If their case I don't think either are very happy most of the time, but they are still together 10 years later. Oh well.
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