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Same thing happened to me, when I got invasilign to fix my gap, took acutane for my skin, and went shopping for some decent threads my girl freaked out and swore that I was going to leave her.
Re trust: once a woman looses trust in you it's almost impossible to earn it back. unless she is your wife it's often not worth the effort or pay off...innocence can't be regained.
Women tolerate mistakes and all have their hang ups, but if you intentionally hurt them, reject them physically, or don't keep your word as a man the relationship and bond is shattered.
She is insecure and sees your self-improvement as moving on and away. She's intimidated and probably feels as though you will start getting more attention from other women as you improve your health and self image. She'll want to keep you on her level. Don't allow her to manipulate you. Continue to work on yourself, and see if you can encourage her to join you.
sounds like your wife or gf is an enabler. if you get fit and stop smoking where does that leave her? Sounds like you either get married or dump her . Oh you are probably not going to marry her cause you are getting a free ride now right? Maybe that's part of her insecurity.
Yes. She is out of shape too. We fell out of shape together after I started a new job with a 12 hour rotating shift schedule. And yes, she has definitely been cheated on before, but who hasn't? Thanks for your advice. You've given me much to mull over.
What does quitting smoking have to do with your g/f not trusting you? In fact what do any of the things you mentioned have to do with lack of trust. I don't get it.
He's physically getting himself together meaning he will get a lot more looks from the opposite sex which is what seems to be worrying his girlfriend.
IMO, she's projecting her own latent promiscous tendencies onto you, and if you don't cheat, she will, or she'll subconsciously resent it if you don't!
Her insecurities are real. Make her feel like it was when you first met. Romance her with a candle lite dinner, some wine, mellow music and take it from there. Make her feel like the woman you have always wanted.
Be sensitive with her, and things will be the way they use to be.
Good luck to you and your wife. I wish you happiness and joy for the rest of the time you are together.
I recently quit smoking, started eating healthier, and exercising. Now my longtime girlfriend doesn't trust me anymore. She doesn't think that I'm cheating but she thinks It's just a matter of time. I can't reassure her enough to make her feel better. Anybody have any suggestions?
Well, if you've already tried to reassure her, and she's not believing you, there isn't much you can do besides wait till she gets over it.
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,516 posts, read 20,003,071 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by penguin_kernel
What does quitting smoking have to do with your g/f not trusting you? In fact what do any of the things you mentioned have to do with lack of trust. I don't get it.
All the so-called experts have a big list of things like this they spread around to warn people that if their spouse is doing any of these things, they're cheating.
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