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Old 11-25-2011, 09:28 PM
 
Location: Earth
3,814 posts, read 6,775,205 times
Reputation: 2590

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FYI I don't have anything against (soft) porn as a whole, but in the OP's case, it's a symptom of something much bigger.
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Old 11-25-2011, 09:31 PM
 
1,446 posts, read 3,545,740 times
Reputation: 603
Quote:
Originally Posted by moonsavvy View Post
FYI I don't have anything against (soft) porn as a whole, but in the OP's case, it's a symptom of something much bigger.
Yeah, with the active search, he may be seeking wetter pastures.
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Old 11-25-2011, 09:36 PM
 
Location: Earth
3,814 posts, read 6,775,205 times
Reputation: 2590
Quote:
Originally Posted by Java378 View Post
Yeah, with the active search, he may be seeking wetter pastures.
Certainly so.
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Old 11-26-2011, 07:02 AM
 
Location: Forests of Maine
37,313 posts, read 61,118,350 times
Reputation: 30244
From the OP what would concern me is:

1- he did this on your PC;

2- he filed out forms;

3- he did not respect you enough to cover his tracks.

Those are the topics that are red flags to me.

then ...

Quote:
Originally Posted by prettybabe View Post
I feel he doesnt respect me either. He normally talks to me harshly and usually blows me off when I'm driving a point across & I'm usually right. we've ended up in unfavorable situations coz he wouldnt listen to me, eg. we moved to a house last month we had no business moving to and ended up moving out last Friday to a house we had no choice and have to move out again after 3 months. last month he invested in an unprofitable business against my advice and made a loss and used the returns to invest in another unprofitable business against my advice. I am doing an MBA and was able to assess the investments. I am a stay at home mom. gave up my career to raise the kids. Will rejoin the workforce once am done with school. Maybe I'll be respected then......
He does not show you any respect.

He talks down to you and is harsh to you.

Then moving into bad housing situations, is a big red flag, more so if you have been advising against each move.

And lastly the investments. Any wise man would seek all the advise he can get before making an investment.


Have you been his sugar-momma in some context? Is he living off your portfolio?

It sounds like he is doing this all to humiliate you, and run you broke.
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Old 11-26-2011, 07:17 AM
 
Location: Albuquerque, New Mexico
2,117 posts, read 5,358,149 times
Reputation: 1533
Quote:
Originally Posted by lottamoxie View Post
It's elementary, really.
Well, that's generalizing.

Funny that the most important people in the world (politics,humanitarians,philanthropists, engineers) are all men.

p.s., to op, women watch porn too, maybe just not you. i know guys that don't watch porn.
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Old 11-26-2011, 07:34 AM
 
Location: Fiorina "Fury" 161
3,511 posts, read 3,713,429 times
Reputation: 6556
Quote:
Originally Posted by prettybabe View Post
When I suggested we attend a marriage seminar early this month he said he had no time for romance only for making money.
Sounds like my kind of guy.
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Old 11-26-2011, 08:03 AM
 
Location: Fiorina "Fury" 161
3,511 posts, read 3,713,429 times
Reputation: 6556
Quote:
Originally Posted by forest beekeeper View Post
From the OP what would concern me is:

1- he did this on your PC;

2- he filed out forms;

3- he did not respect you enough to cover his tracks.

Those are the topics that are red flags to me.

then ...
The bolded part is what should be a concern. I'm not really interested in going to "MaidModerator: PG13" so I don't know what the site is all about. It could be that he was required to fill out a form just to gain access to the site and that's all it is. Many sites, even ones that have nothing to do with porn, often have a front page (sign-in page) and you have to sign up just to gain access to the site's content. So, he was curious about a fantasy and had to fill out a form just to see what was on the site. It doesn't necessarily prove intent to cheat.

Quote:
Originally Posted by prettybabe View Post
I feel he doesnt respect me either. He normally talks to me harshly and usually blows me off when I'm driving a point across & I'm usually right. we've ended up in unfavorable situations coz he wouldnt listen to me, eg. we moved to a house last month we had no business moving to and ended up moving out last Friday to a house we had no choice and have to move out again after 3 months. last month he invested in an unprofitable business against my advice and made a loss and used the returns to invest in another unprofitable business against my advice. I am doing an MBA and was able to assess the investments. I am a stay at home mom. gave up my career to raise the kids. Will rejoin the workforce once am done with school. Maybe I'll be respected then......
This is why money problems are so big in a marriage. If he has his mind on his money and his money on his mind, and he is failing in his investments, then obviously he isn't going to feel all romantic and will be in a less than happy mood. Seems like he is using porn as an escape for his troubles. Okay under normal circumstances but it can get out of control for some guys who aren't able to compartmentalize it.
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Old 11-26-2011, 08:04 AM
 
13,513 posts, read 19,227,316 times
Reputation: 16580
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aganusn View Post
Welcome to humanity, where expecting to keep the same interest in one person for the rest of your life is a fairytale. I think you're a little old-fashioned.
I don't think it's old fashioned at all to want respect and faithfulness from your partner in life.....maybe instead of watching porn.... if this man spent as much of his time and energy on making his wife feel wanted and loved...they could/would make their own porn.....I'm in agreement with the other poster that said it may already be too late...if he's looking for hookups, he may have already stepped outside the confines of marriage and fidelity.
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Old 11-26-2011, 08:50 AM
 
Location: SW MO
23,593 posts, read 37,377,482 times
Reputation: 29336
Quote:
Originally Posted by Huckleberry3911948 View Post
no sex no food aka the standard fare for an american married man = wandering eye
Bung!
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Old 11-26-2011, 09:03 AM
 
471 posts, read 480,556 times
Reputation: 155
So my thread gets shut down for being inappropriate, but this thread about porn can stay.

Interesting.
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