why do straight guys who like your originally shy away after they find out you're gay? (woman, husband)

[T. Damon]

Originally Posted by oceanman76

I used to have a male gay friend back in the day. He was pretty damn cool. I have long moved away. It was a time when I was going out a lot to bars and clubs when I was not in a relationship. When we would go out together he was the best wingman ever. The women gravitated to him and then I would sweep them up.

My brothers used to use me as "chum" bait at the clubs- the tall, muscular good looking guy who looks at girls in their eyes as opposed to their breasts and gets them all comfortable and then sweep in for the kill.

A straight guy not utilizing the wily ways of a good looking gay buddy once in a while to score is an idiot.

[Prairieparson]

Sorry to tell you this, but as far as most men are concerned, "you're out of the club" you're not one of the guys anymore, because you've changed teams.

[artsyguy]

I'm not a lesbian, a tranny, or a fat Jabba The Hut pig (i.e., average citizen). I don't shun them or anyone else. I'm very compassionate

Originally Posted by Percentage

Here we go, i'm sure this post is being made by a gay man. Sorry but we are not buying your logic. I can accept calling some hetero males insecure and immature but making a silly comment like they are attracted to the OP is beyond ridiculous. Please stop IT! You sound crazy as hell!!!!!

[Rlarson21]

Originally Posted by LaoTzuMindFu

Because they were normal college aged guys on a trip to a foriegn country and there were out looking to hook up with some chicks. They didnt need or want someone who would be against hooking up with chicks hanging around to mess up the action. If it were 5 guys and one was married they would not have invited the married guy along either.

Seriously, its been "a few years" since this event and it still bothers you?

i wasn't against anyone hooking up with chicks, i just wanted to be honest about the fact that i didn't like chicks, so that i didn't have to pretend and be all awkward.

[Suncc49]

Originally Posted by artsyguy

Intuitively I would postulate that they are secretly attracted to the OP and must "avoid" or "escape" him in order to avoid their own feelings or they are just very bitter people with an inferiority complex looking for an excuse to "one-up".

Just like alot of older guys dream of women they cannot attain (younger model types / porn stars / whatever) , I have heard gay men fantasize about turning a hetero man gay.....


Whatever people do in their own bedrooms is their business. Maybe these guys were just not exposed to or met someone who was gay before.

[onihC]

Originally Posted by Rlarson21

i wasn't against anyone hooking up with chicks, i just wanted to be honest about the fact that i didn't like chicks, so that i didn't have to pretend and be all awkward.

Sure, you were not AGAINST it but you didn’t have something in common to their goals (hooking up with chicks). Imagine you went to a vegetarian convention and someone in the group said he/she loved ribs, bbq, etc. There is that possibility that he/she would feel a bit out of the group for not sharing the same interests.

[Urban Sasquatch]

Originally Posted by Percentage

With all due respect, i dont think it has anything to do with insecurity. My first exposure to a homosexual male was, i believe at a previous job. He'd always come around me discussing how his boy friend was doing this and that...I understood he was gay but it took a while for me to get used to a man referring to another man as his "boyfriend." I wasnt threatened or didnt feel insecure but i was uncomfortable...some people just need a little time to get used to it.

^^^^
This.


When I was a kid I grew up in a rural area and "gay" was automatically alien, bad, to be shunned. The designation "*****" ORIGINATED because it meant "not the norm, not the usual", and developed into a derogatory remark.

When a thing is "*****", a perfectly valid, normal word, that's what it MEANS: Odd, strange, unusual, not the norm. These days the word itself is practically taboo in its gross misuse, much like "rhetoric" has come to mean "I didn't really MEAN it" rather than analytical and exploratory.


As I got older and was exposed to more and more gay people, as it became more socially acceptable, I simply GOT USED to the idea of someone of a different sexual persuasion. That's all.

These guys... well, age and experience just make a difference, that's all. That, and we don't know HOW you actually broached the topic. Sometimes it's meaningless, other times can be offensive. Situations vary.

[Urban Sasquatch]

And by "practically taboo" -- look, it was automatically edited out of my message.

It's a perfectly normal, perfectly VALID word, yet we fear language so much these days even the word "q u e e r" cannot remain for fear it will be applied in a certain fashion.

THAT is why those guys walked away from the OP: Fear born of ignorance. It's hardly a fault on their part; when have they ever learned to cope?

[Capt. Dan]

Because us straight guys have a built in fear of banjos. One line we never want to hear someone say is "squeal like a pig boy!" We cant help it. Youre either a Cubs fan or a White Sox fan. You gotta choose sides. Banjos!~ da da da da da da

[LS Jaun]

Most straight guys don't look at the bigger picture: There is only upside having a gay man as a friend to a straight guy. They usually don't hit on you knowing your straight. They can make good wing men for both men and women. It also takes one more man out of the competition for single females. And many times gay men have a lot of straight single female friends......"See, All Good"!