U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 1.5 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Jump to a detailed profile or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Business Search - 14 Million verified businesses
Search for:  near: 
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 12-17-2011, 04:18 PM
 
Location: Boca Raton, FL
4,036 posts, read 5,067,683 times
Reputation: 3583

Advertisements

Your family is told by your adult daughter (27) that you are invited to someone's home.

Other family members are supposedly going as well and have indicated so.

You see the homeowner and talk but there is NO mention of seeing your family in the next few weeks. You give ample room to have that said.

Your niece (also 27) insists you are invited - that her mom just doesn't do formal invites.

The person's home is your ex-sister-in-law but all have been on good terms but she has just moved to a new home closer to all.

PS - Have asked for a FB friendship - no response.

What would you do? (I do not want to show up on her doorstep).

(She has 4 children with my brother - 3 of them now have their own homes and one lives in an apartment while going to college).
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 12-17-2011, 05:52 PM
 
810 posts, read 551,583 times
Reputation: 1067
I would not show up at any one's house unless the host or hostess invited me.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-17-2011, 06:01 PM
 
8,394 posts, read 7,247,526 times
Reputation: 8958
Quote:
Originally Posted by blondiel View Post
I would not show up at any one's house unless the host or hostess invited me.
I take it this is not the norm for you to be at your Ex SIL home?? If not, I would not just show up. Maybe she invited the kids, and didn't want to exclude you but since she didn't mention it to you in person, I wouldn't show up. Course, you could break the ice and invite her for coffee this week, then you'd know for sure if she doesn't sound interested.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-17-2011, 06:05 PM
Status: "This is the life..." (set 15 days ago)
 
Location: tampa bay
4,606 posts, read 2,778,722 times
Reputation: 5746
The FB should have been your hint...you are not invited...if you show up they will be nice to you for your daughters sake...but you will feel uncomfortable!Trust me don't go!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-17-2011, 06:12 PM
 
658 posts, read 655,254 times
Reputation: 719
Had this ex-sister-in-law ever directly invited you?

If she was fine with inviting the rest of the family and you mentioned that you guys are on good terms, I don't see why you would be singled out. If you believe in your friendship and genuinely want to go, you could always confirm with her the next time you talk by asking something along the lines of "Btw, my daughter and nephew have mentioned that you have a party on ___? Sounds like fine. What is that about?" That would give her plenty of chance to give you a formal invitation over the phone. If she doesn't take the chance, you know what to do.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-17-2011, 06:17 PM
 
658 posts, read 655,254 times
Reputation: 719
I wouldn't worry too much about the FB thing. A portion of FB users do not log on every day like the rest of us. Unless of course, if you know for certain that she is active on facebook and it has been a while that she has ignored your invite.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-17-2011, 07:09 PM
 
Location: Southern California
12,460 posts, read 9,319,175 times
Reputation: 8120
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bette View Post
Your family is told by your adult daughter (27) that you are invited to someone's home.

Other family members are supposedly going as well and have indicated so.

You see the homeowner and talk but there is NO mention of seeing your family in the next few weeks. You give ample room to have that said.

Your niece (also 27) insists you are invited - that her mom just doesn't do formal invites.

The person's home is your ex-sister-in-law but all have been on good terms but she has just moved to a new home closer to all.

PS - Have asked for a FB friendship - no response.

What would you do? (I do not want to show up on her doorstep).

(She has 4 children with my brother - 3 of them now have their own homes and one lives in an apartment while going to college).
If the person in question was a stranger or someone not well known, I'd wait for a 'formal' invite (verbal would be sufficient). But if the person is known to you, which it appears to be the case here, I'd ask something like, "Hey, is it cool if I come over?"

[maybe the ex-SIL thinks/knows you are already coming over, it's cool with her, and doesn't see the need to formally invite you]
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-17-2011, 07:55 PM
 
12,298 posts, read 7,323,480 times
Reputation: 9281
It's an unclear, iffy situation so I'd be skeptical too. I'd wait for an invite and if I don't receive one then make other plans.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-17-2011, 08:33 PM
 
Location: Tennessee
15,402 posts, read 14,516,241 times
Reputation: 21809
No invite from the mouth..(especially with the EX-in -laws) then do not go.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-17-2011, 09:40 PM
 
Location: San Antonio/Houston
21,392 posts, read 23,081,435 times
Reputation: 51115
I would not take third party invitation. In my opinion, you are NOT invited.
__________________
.
"No Copyrighted Material"
Moderated forums: Houston, San Antonio, Tallahassee, Macon, Duluth, Exercise and Fitness, Fish, Home Interior Design and Decorating.
When in doubt read: ToS, Mod List, Rules & FAQ's, Guide, CD Home page, How to Search
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $84,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
Similar Threads

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2014, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25 - Top