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Old 12-30-2011, 12:21 AM
 
1,846 posts, read 2,604,180 times
Reputation: 2482

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Quote:
Originally Posted by PurePugx3 View Post
Posters should be reported because they didn't agree with her or had a different POV in some cases? I think that's a little overboard, especially given the fact all she wanted was for everyone to agree with her. If you look back at some of her responses, all she does is argue, use sarcasm, a lot of CAPS. When someone posts on a controversial topic, they should expect a lot of different POV's in response. If she can't take that on board, why bother posting? Adultery is a topic that will get people riled up in a lot of ways and so she got what she wanted in that regard. Perhaps her new account should be disabled?
No..this is not what I stated at all..
What I stated was in response to her post..which was quoted clearly..

Meaning if she is receiving harassing PM'S "Private Messages" then she is well within her right as a poster to report the user to the mod moderating this forum...

Posting on a public forum ALWAYS means that some posters are going to have differing opinions and this means that one has the right to refute, rebuke and respond in kind..within certain limitations that do not go beyond, baiting or inciting hostility...
And yes as Mods on different forums or websites WE know which threads will be up for MORE than just a differeing opinion...and can and will possibly get hostile..and we anticipate and depend on these reports in order to moderate effectively...
What did you not understand? I was merely giving a poster an option to curb this unsavory behavior..
Infidelity is always a touchy subject...but to know the facts that are laid out whether we choose to believe them or not does not quantify harrassment and trollish behavior via the pm's...this is considered "cyber bullying"
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Old 12-30-2011, 12:57 AM
 
1,429 posts, read 2,004,280 times
Reputation: 1890
I truly believe the OP was mislead and lied to in order for this dirtbag to get into her pants, and I was going to type up a "what's wrong with all you people!" reply, but then going back to the original post:

Quote:
Originally Posted by XmadisonX View Post


I am wondering maybe he did not want to file a complaint jointly is because he wants to communicate with me. .
That's an odd thing for somebody who was utterly betrayed, mislead, tricked, etc to say, or to think.

To with one breath be so offended you inform the wife of his betrayal, then the next "Hmm..I wonder if it means he still wants to go out with me.."

Either way guy's a complete loser..
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Old 12-30-2011, 05:17 AM
 
139 posts, read 127,309 times
Reputation: 114
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheEarthBeneathMe View Post
I truly believe the OP was mislead and lied to in order for this dirtbag to get into her pants, and I was going to type up a "what's wrong with all you people!" reply, but then going back to the original post:



That's an odd thing for somebody who was utterly betrayed, mislead, tricked, etc to say, or to think.

To with one breath be so offended you inform the wife of his betrayal, then the next "Hmm..I wonder if it means he still wants to go out with me.."


Either way guy's a complete loser..

I NEVER SAID I WONDER IF HE WANTS TO GO OUT WITH ME.. EVEN the detective said an wondered why he did not file. Its a normal question to ask an wonder in this situation.
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Old 12-30-2011, 05:23 AM
 
139 posts, read 127,309 times
Reputation: 114
Anyone who feels that me calling the wife was WRONG... tells me that most likely YOU are a cheater and would not want your significant other to know what a cheat you are.

Ask yourself wouldn't you want to know if your husband or wife was cheating on you? It be odd if you did not want to know this. Since this person is betraying you and putting your life in danger. Only a foolish person would not want to know that there husband or wife is a cheater.
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Old 12-30-2011, 06:37 AM
 
23,772 posts, read 30,665,081 times
Reputation: 28259
Quote:
Originally Posted by XmadisonX View Post
Anyone who feels that me calling the wife was WRONG... tells me that most likely YOU are a cheater and would not want your significant other to know what a cheat you are.

Ask yourself wouldn't you want to know if your husband or wife was cheating on you? It be odd if you did not want to know this. Since this person is betraying you and putting your life in danger. Only a foolish person would not want to know that there husband or wife is a cheater.
I don't think most people really care about the fact that you called. It's pretty clear that you did it out of anger and hurt, though - certainly not out of any health concern for the wife - that is ludicrous to even say that. Hell I might have called the woman too...I don't really know how I would behave in that situation.

What most are reacting to, is the fact that you can't leave it alone. Who the hell cares why he did or did not do something? It's DONE. MOVE ON.

Good grief.
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Old 12-30-2011, 09:20 AM
 
1,429 posts, read 2,004,280 times
Reputation: 1890
Quote:
Originally Posted by XmadisonX View Post
I NEVER SAID I WONDER IF HE WANTS TO GO OUT WITH ME.. EVEN the detective said an wondered why he did not file. Its a normal question to ask an wonder in this situation.
I don't exactly think it is a normal question to ask.

Negative:
Betrayed you, lied to you, printed up fake medical reports to deceive you, put you at risk for stds, took you for a fool

Positive:
Didn't file a joint police report against you with his wife.

When the question on your mind after those is "I wonder if it means he wants to continue to communicate with me..." the road entitled "outrage" would appear to have a few potholes and turns in it..

Not to mention the part of "just getting over him."

And I'm not saying you weren't deceived, or claiming that you would continue on as the second pick mistress, just saying I can kind of see where other people are coming from. I think many are adding in their own parts, but I think what you gave in the op is more gray area rather than black and white.

And if its any indication of your reasoning..
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Old 12-30-2011, 09:50 AM
 
663 posts, read 894,500 times
Reputation: 940
Quote:
Originally Posted by dr74 View Post
No..this is not what I stated at all..
What I stated was in response to her post..which was quoted clearly..

Meaning if she is receiving harassing PM'S "Private Messages" then she is well within her right as a poster to report the user to the mod moderating this forum...

Posting on a public forum ALWAYS means that some posters are going to have differing opinions and this means that one has the right to refute, rebuke and respond in kind..within certain limitations that do not go beyond, baiting or inciting hostility...
And yes as Mods on different forums or websites WE know which threads will be up for MORE than just a differeing opinion...and can and will possibly get hostile..and we anticipate and depend on these reports in order to moderate effectively...
What did you not understand? I was merely giving a poster an option to curb this unsavory behavior..
Infidelity is always a touchy subject...but to know the facts that are laid out whether we choose to believe them or not does not quantify harrassment and
trollish behavior via the pm's...this is considered "cyber bullying"
From everything I read, the OP had nothing but praise for the DM's and PM's she received. So?

You are not a mod here so I'm not sure why you are openly policing anything. You just as easily could have sent her a PM and left it at that. Instead you posted it within the thread to make a point and make sure others saw it.

Lame.
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Old 12-30-2011, 07:39 PM
 
Location: Lower east side of Toronto
10,589 posts, read 10,163,483 times
Reputation: 9258
In this world of neo-liberalism people actually think that everyone thinks the same and has the same values. Recently I spoke to an older woman who had a crush on this guy way back in high school - She runs into him at a party...and later has sex with him - as she put it "we consumated the relationship" - well...that's all fine and dandy...the woman is a lonely old widow who lives with her 17 year old son...who is ALSO involved with a young woman with a child - and a wayward husband..

Anyway the widow told me that the man she consumated the relationship with was a married man...The fact that I frowned on what she did - caught her by surprise - This woman wants to have a relationship with me - but I am not interested - someone who believes that underhanded treachery is normal is not a person I want to get close to...

Now getting back to her son the 17 year old _ I had to explain to the widow that her son was probably interfering in a relationship that involves a child - that she should explain to the kid that damaging someones family through this type of interference is not ecceptable...It's just odd that the values that people have these days...Not that I am innocent - but I learned the hard way ...as a young man I slept with a married woman - her husband was a nice guy - a cop on the night shift..I regret to this day what happened ...it was caused through the bad judgement brought on by drunkeness....Yes there is not much I regret - but bringing about adultry in the life of others is simply bad...

Self serving seduction of another serves no good purpose...five minutes of stolen pleasure - can alter a life forever.
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Old 12-30-2011, 08:11 PM
 
663 posts, read 894,500 times
Reputation: 940
Quote:
Originally Posted by XmadisonX;
Anyone who feels that me calling the wife was WRONG... tells me that most likely YOU are a cheater and would not want your significant other to know what a cheat you are.

Ask yourself wouldn't you want to know if your husband or wife was cheating on you? It be odd if you did not want to know this. Since this person is betraying you and putting your life in danger. Only a foolish person would not want to know that there husband or wife is a cheater.
So you think everyone who has a differing opinion from yours is wrong? Certainly your sweeping generalizations, just because you own them, do not make them facts. I think what you did was wrong and it doesn't make me a closet cheater. All it makes is I don't agree with you; nothing more or less.

Most people I know who have been cheated on, they were aware of their spouse's behavior and tolerated it for whatever reason. That's their business, not mine.

I don't believe it takes a rocket scientist to figure out your spouse is cheating. Most people who "had no idea" are usually in denial or married to a sociopath so adept at sneakiness that most never become wise to their true behavior.

Don't you think most responsible women concerned about their health go to the gynecologist for the annual and would find out about any STD's then? Since I don't cheat, if I came up with an STD there's only one other person who can be named the guilty party. Pretty easy math.

In any case, did you let the wife know you also have Herpes?
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Old 12-30-2011, 09:16 PM
 
139 posts, read 127,309 times
Reputation: 114
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChessieMom View Post
I don't think most people really care about the fact that you called. It's pretty clear that you did it out of anger and hurt, though - certainly not out of any health concern for the wife - that is ludicrous to even say that. Hell I might have called the woman too...I don't really know how I would behave in that situation.

What most are reacting to, is the fact that you can't leave it alone. Who the hell cares why he did or did not do something? It's DONE. MOVE ON.

Good grief.
i did not call her out of anger i called her to let her know I DID MOVE ON this happened and I left in AUGUST she filed in DECEMBER.
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