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Old 12-22-2011, 08:33 AM
 
Location: North America
14,204 posts, read 12,233,813 times
Reputation: 5565

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Quote:
Originally Posted by elnina View Post
What that suppose to mean? Are you still interested in him?
There is nothing to ponder, just learn your lesson and move on.
In the future don't believe men that say things like: I am in the divorce process, I am separated, my wife don't understand me, I am married, but we live separate ways etc. Men just say so when they want a little "extra excitement" on the site. They will have their little fun with you, and go back to their wives. A man who cheats on his wife will cheat on your too...

Not always, there are many people who cheat once and never do it again.
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Old 12-22-2011, 08:39 AM
 
Location: Elsewhere
88,224 posts, read 84,144,315 times
Reputation: 114530
I don't get what kind of complaint could be filed with the police over this.
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Old 12-22-2011, 08:40 AM
 
Location: North America
14,204 posts, read 12,233,813 times
Reputation: 5565
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mightyqueen801 View Post
I don't get what kind of complaint could be filed with the police over this.

She is probaly claiming she was being harassed.
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Old 12-22-2011, 08:41 AM
 
406 posts, read 769,438 times
Reputation: 519
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lucidkitty View Post
Not always, there are many people who cheat once and never do it again.
thank you.
I realize that there are players out there who will cheat over and over and over again. I understand the saying "if he cheated with you, he will cheat on you." I get where it comes from, but it is not always true.

as with the "once a cheater, always a cheater."
it's just not always true.


I cheated on my ex. I was so lonely and so unhappy. I should have divorced him or gotten into counseling. I never planned to cheat, but because I let my marriage and myself get into such a depressed state, it eventually did happen. I felt horrible. I felt miserable. I knew I was hurting not only my husband, but I was hurting myself and the man I was cheating with.
Because I know how horribly I felt doing it that once, I know I will never do it again......
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Old 12-22-2011, 08:46 AM
 
Location: North America
14,204 posts, read 12,233,813 times
Reputation: 5565
Quote:
Originally Posted by bitterclinger View Post
thank you.
I realize that there are players out there who will cheat over and over and over again. I understand the saying "if he cheated with you, he will cheat on you." I get where it comes from, but it is not always true.

as with the "once a cheater, always a cheater."
it's just not always true.


I cheated on my ex. I was so lonely and so unhappy. I should have divorced him or gotten into counseling. I never planned to cheat, but because I let my marriage and myself get into such a depressed state, it eventually did happen. I felt horrible. I felt miserable. I knew I was hurting not only my husband, but I was hurting myself and the man I was cheating with.
Because I know how horribly I felt doing it that once, I know I will never do it again......

However that is what you needed to do in order to move on with your life so you shouldn't beat yourself over it ~hugs~. And i find that most people do it during their life at some point....situations make life much more gray than black and white.
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Old 12-22-2011, 08:53 AM
 
625 posts, read 900,046 times
Reputation: 1105
Quote:
Originally Posted by XmadisonX View Post
I recently got involved with a married man who told me that he was legally divorced, only to find out that he was lying and not even seperated. I contacted his wife to let her know about the emails, phone calls, gifts and nude photos he had been sending me...and I called her with out being hostile and rude. Well turns out that she went to the police with him and she filed a report but he did not. The Police called me telling me ONLY she filed the complaint and he was with her but did not file one against me. ......... All I did was tell her what he was doing. I dont understand this. I left him and cut him off. I was not mean to her and I dont understand why is it that she only filed a compliant an he went with her and did not. I dont understand it and the detective that called me said he was also confused and found it odd that he did not file a complaint....

I am hurt that they would file a complaint and I JUST got over him and then this was like a extra smack in the face.

I am wondering maybe he did not want to file a complaint jointly is because he wants to communicate with me. .

Your feed back is appreciated.

Hello,

The moment you found out the truth, you should have cut all ties. Why is that women often feel the need to expose the man's infidelity. Why bring hurt to another individual. I believe you were being vindictive because he lied to you so you felt you could get back at him. What did you think was going to happen, she would kick him out... right?... and what does that solve....

As a woman, I think that's very low and disgusting and I'm glad she filed the complaint. When you think about it, you harassed the woman. You went out of your way to find her number. That's just plain evil.

The man is a lying, cheating bastard, but that has nothing to do with his wife. Leave the woman alone. Leave the man alone and go find someone else. You must have known there was someone else. Did he invite you to his house? Did he sleep over? Did he take you away for long weekends? There must have been signs (that you chose to overlook). Your issue is with the man and has been resolved the minute you found out he was still married. Get over it and move on. Know your self worth, Madison.
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Old 12-22-2011, 08:56 AM
 
Location: Maine at last
399 posts, read 852,505 times
Reputation: 695
How many times did you call his wife? Did you go near the residence? Could it be a restraining order? Why would you call his wife in the first place? To get some revenge for being wronged. Sorry that happend to you and it happens lots these days. try to move on and forget about it all. It certainly is not worth your time and energy and can only make things worse. There are plenty of nice guys out there. Keep looking and ask some questions along the way. Good Luck!
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Old 12-22-2011, 09:11 AM
 
406 posts, read 769,438 times
Reputation: 519
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lucidkitty View Post
However that is what you needed to do in order to move on with your life so you shouldn't beat yourself over it ~hugs~. And i find that most people do it during their life at some point....situations make life much more gray than black and white.
thank you. I don't beat myself up over it. It's done. I can't change it, but I can learn from it. That's why I liked your post.
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Old 12-22-2011, 09:20 AM
 
Location: Hudson County, NJ
1,489 posts, read 3,081,552 times
Reputation: 1193
I think you did the right thing. I'm kind of appalled how many people here think the right thing is not to say anything.

If I was in those shoes, I would want to know if my spouse was cheating on me. Sure I'd be pissed at the person that enabled them to cheat, but it depends on whether the person knew the spouse was married, or if the spouse pulled some lies and said they were single.

Just completely cut contact with him and i think you'll be fine. Hold onto the evidence of him implying he was single/divorced.
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Old 12-22-2011, 09:50 AM
 
28,896 posts, read 54,011,888 times
Reputation: 46668
First-time poster with lots of drama. Hmmmm.
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