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Well, I suppose if you're going to speak to a larger population than it's time to start linking. I certainly won't take anyone's word and I'm not privy to conversations I haven't read from people I have never communicated with. I can only imagine *some balding, boring, overweight man who knows he's not much to look at, so he decides to purchase a wife*. I think I saw some youtube vids that addressed it a year or so ago.
Isn't that what we do in every post, discuss the entire issue, not solely the issue based on people commenting in the thread? I'm not invested enough in this subject to start linking, any of the readers who are interested can conduct a web search for forums discussing marriage to foreign women.
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Originally Posted by Braunwyn
The first thing that comes to mind for me is -aren't these two of the same cloth? why is it a last resort for him when it's his own people? Regardless, these women are well rejected en masse by these guys. In my mind this squashes the whole I'm rejected side to the conversation. Now, as far as wanting and being rejected by women out of their league goes, surely the responsibility cannot be put on these women. Of course, that's what they do.
I've read enough of these men's opinions to see they aren't two of the same cloth. The difference is their attitude towards the women they aren't dating (American / Western women). One side is very negative and blames the women, the other side does not.
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Originally Posted by Braunwyn
Census provides marriage rates and there are plenty of studies that tie finances, level of education, and race to marriage rates. This is nothing new. I made two points in regards to economics 1. rights and 2. "As far as marriage rates go, as we have discussed in the past, it's tied to economics. Marriage rates are up for the affluent and down for the struggling. Things may change when/if the economy turns around."
One of the main differences between the affluent and the struggling is economics, although I'm sure education and culture are playing significant roles as well.
I've only seen decreasing marriage rate charts past 50 years for the overall population. I am not separating into income groups, I am referring to all of us. If you prefer to separate by income groups, that's fine. I have not viewed any charts that separate marriage rates in this way. Maybe that's why we disagree, since we're viewing different charts.
Were did I insult you, the only insults I see on here are from the women(like the person above who now wants to question my intelligence).
I'm just calling it as I see it. But yes, that is exactly what I'm doing in this thread.
Quote:
Originally Posted by he's so hott
What's at the heart of the issue, irrationality? Maybe, but not of all these guys can be labeled as irrational. Women can be very picky & sometimes the smallest thing that may not be a big deal to one is huge to another. I think that is what most of the guys are encountering. Some of these guys end up wondering what the issue is with them & in most cases they'll never be able to place their finger on it. This is what leads to threads like this.
These men do not end up wondering what's wrong with them. This thread clearly shows that. And yes, imo the irrational nature of these men is at the heart of their rejection. The OP just 10 posts ago, in a different thread, was stating how he's a single by choice guy. He's loving his life. One week later he's so desperate for a wife he's going to order one. He claims American women are too picky because he's a good catch guy with his shyte together. Then we find out he's a 45 year old man with a breathalyzer in his car. Cockamamie.
Beyond the OP, as I mentioned posts ago, we have men that want subservient women who will not be financial burdens. Cockamamie.
Just recently it's ok for men to charge a woman's femininity, but it's not ok for women to charge men's masculinity. Cockamamie.
The reality is that there are a lot of men to choose from out there, a lot of great men. For single, beautiful, intelligent women with their shyte together there is no reason to entertain the type of irrational worldviews presented in this thread.
I've only seen decreasing marriage rate charts past 50 years for the overall population. I am not separating into income groups, I am referring to all of us. If you prefer to separate by income groups, that's fine. I have not viewed any charts that separate marriage rates in this way. Maybe that's why we disagree, since we're viewing different charts.
She is correct, the higher the education the more likely you are to be married in todays day and age.
What's at the heart of the issue, irrationality? Maybe, but not of all these guys can be labeled as irrational. Women can be very picky & sometimes the smallest thing that may not be a big deal to one is huge to another. I think that is what most of the guys are encountering. Some of these guys end up wondering what the issue is with them & in most cases they'll never be able to place their finger on it. This is what leads to threads like this.
I ask you, why is it that so many men and women can get married and actually have pretty good relationships while some, both men and women, sit around whining about the lack of quality in the opposite sex?
It was rhetorical because I'm going to tell you why. Men and women who can't get a date and are unable to maintain a relationship with the opposite sex either have unrealistically high expectations or some personality quirk that simply isn't appealing.
I am not blaming men here unlike half the male posters on here who label a whole group, the opposite sex, as too demanding.
That is what riles the women around here, the great big fat generalisations of a whole gender numbering millions.
I think a person should be allowed to have a limited relationship with a woman if he wants to and she is willing. He wants a hot babe who will bang his brains out and be grateful that she has a safe place to live and a man who takes care of what she needs too. He doesn't care if she speaks much English or went to college. They won't have much to talk about, but there are a lot of marriages where there is not much to talk about.
It isn't my desire to have this type of relationship, but how can people slam him if that is what he wants to do? He rescues some girl from what would be a much worse fate. And, don't think for a minute that European men are a box of chocolates to live with. Many countries to don't consider minor injuries to the wife to be a crime, nor rape of a wife prohibited. And, some countries do not recognize property rights of women in divorce.
I don't want to call out specific members, but if you read the forum and pay attention you will see it.
Good morning,
If you choose, PM me and I will read their posting histories. I am aware of a group of about 5 members who probably fit what you're referring to.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Braunwyn
There are a few men on this forum who want subservient, financially independent women. Even this thread shows something similar. Not so much about asking on dates, but the idea of subservience without financial dependence. Out of one side of the mouth people yammer on about the traditional lady who will kowtow. Women by their very traditional nature who require access to the money pockets. Out of the other side of their mouths they put forth warnings of women who will try to put their hands into the money pockets. You know the morons. The one's who desire a stay at home wife and yet balk at the idea of alimony. It's quite schizo and common on this forum.
I am aware of this double standard you refer to. If that is their belief, I disagree with it completely since I'm against any double standards and prefer true gender equality over the idealized 1950s gender roles. I don't want women to have less freedom, and I don't want men to be the only gender required to support the family financially.
However, let's accept the premise that you're right about their aims and put it to the side for the moment:
Have you also considered the possibility that one can argue for a return to a society of "traditional women", yet also debate "if we MUST (involuntarily) live in a society without traditional women, can we at least make things truly equal between the genders in social situations as well?" That's what I read between the lines in these arguments that seem contradictory at face value.
Isn't that what we do in every post, discuss the entire issue, not solely the issue based on people commenting in the thread? I'm not invested enough in this subject to start linking, any of the readers who are interested can conduct a web search for forums discussing marriage to foreign women.
That is just nonsense from my pov. It's exactly why so many of us assume our reality can be generalized onto populations. But, I will try to keep my expectations about the quality of conversation to a minimum.
Quote:
I've read enough of these men's opinions to see they aren't two of the same cloth. The difference is their attitude towards the women they aren't dating (American / Western women). One side is very negative and blames the women, the other side does not.
The men in this thread aren't dating anyone. What are you talking about?
Quote:
I've only seen decreasing marriage rate charts past 50 years for the overall population. I am not separating into income groups, I am referring to all of us. If you prefer to separate by income groups, that's fine. I have not viewed any charts that separate marriage rates in this way. Maybe that's why we disagree, since we're viewing different charts.
I have seen no charts from you. Further, willfully ignoring groups is a fruitless approach, be it income, education, culture, religion. It renders zero understanding into why and how changes occur in populations, regardless of what we're looking at (i.e.,marriage rates, disease and health, etc.).
I think a person should be allowed to have a limited relationship with a woman if he wants to and she is willing. He wants a hot babe who will bang his brains out and be grateful that she has a safe place to live and a man who takes care of what she needs too. He doesn't care if she speaks much English or went to college. They won't have much to talk about, but there are a lot of marriages where there is not much to talk about.
It isn't my desire to have this type of relationship, but how can people slam him if that is what he wants to do? He rescues some girl from what would be a much worse fate. And, don't think for a minute that European men are a box of chocolates to live with. Many countries to don't consider minor injuries to the wife to be a crime, nor rape of a wife prohibited. And, some countries do not recognize property rights of women in divorce.
I think anyone that's meeting someone new/getting married would want to be happy. And perhaps the average men you know are miserable, but you know what? Most men in America are average. Do you honestly believe they are ALL unhappy? There are also happy average men. There are also happy and unhappy above average men as well, just based on the people of this website and their experiences of others.
I don't necessarily disagree with a guy that finds a nice women who happens to be from another country, but I don't think he can paint every women in certain countries with the same brush. There are great women in America as well as overseas. There are gold-diggers in America as well as overseas. I think others would rather him be more open to realizing that the grass is just as green as it is elsewhere: We are all people after all, striving for the same basic things.
Good morning,
No, I do not believe ALL are unhappy. I do believe a large segment are in both the happy and unhappy camps, but I cannot speak for the majority of society. I only speak for what I see in my small slice of the population through my personal life and my clients, and trends that play out in stats, and in conversations with people all over the country.
My opinions simply recognize trends. There's no reason for discussing anything here if everything is considered painting with a broad brush. I at least try to give multiple reason or use the "some, many, most" qualifiers to avoid straight generalizing.
I agree with your "realist" view that men should take with foreign women. Besides attitudes due to culture, they are still people just like us at the end of the day with good, bad, sweet, mean, loyal, disloyal qualities.
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