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Under the heading Relationships I would assume its an advice column where people come togather to exchange ideas and experiances and to offer help to those in need.
My question is this: Do you think that most people given the opportunity to improve their situation would explore other approaches to lifes problems or do you think they are looking for advice that validates what they are already doing?
There was a thread started about this... interventions on CD. that got really big, because you hit it on the head... people don't so often come here for help, as they come here to pour out their sob story, accumulate sympathy and well-wishers (and with the high turnover rate that CD has, ...it NEVER ENDS with the sympathy and support) and they are looking for advice that validates what they are already doing, rather than asking for that stepping stone to courage that it takes to actually reMOVE yourself from a situation and DO something constructive. More often than not, they aren't happy with their situation, but not upset enough to really take the advice and leave, disrupting their life as they know it. Manipulating their own minds, they justify reasons for what they are already doing...or overlooking not doing.... these people, I pray for. These people, I was one of.
I could rant about this all day, ...because some people, and some posts, I just don't even bother opening anymore. But I won't I've found that the longer your paragraph looks in a post, the more intimidating and less likely people will sit there and read through the whole thing.
Sometimes the best thing you can do to help someone is just to let them cry on you, offer your condolences, your support, your sympathy, your love.
Sometimes..... the ONLY thing you can do to really help someone is to light a FIRE under their @ss to get them moving in a constructive and positive manner.
"If you're not conscienciously moving forwards... you're rolling back downhill again."
Under the heading Relationships I would assume its an advice column where people come togather to exchange ideas and experiances and to offer help to those in need.
My question is this: Do you think that most people given the opportunity to improve their situation would explore other approaches to lifes problems or do you think they are looking for advice that validates what they are already doing?
I think it's a combination of both.
I'm a moderator on a forum that deals with dating and relationships. One of our mottos is that we won't tell you what you want to hear - we'll tell you what you need to hear. We don't sugar-coat things.
We get some people who are genuinely looking for advice, and take members' words to heart. We also get a lot of people who say they're looking for advice, when they're actually looking for validation - and if they don't get it, they get pretty pissy about it.
I've seen both here. There are times in life when I need to be told things I don't want to hear. I might not like it but I will be grateful down the road.
I tend to agree with all who say that its both of the reasons. As a newcomer to this forum,(about two months), I can say that its been helpful to me. But, everything Ive posted has been a serious question, or a sincere response to anothers post. I like jokes a lot, but I really dont have a lot of time to devote even to the serious posts. The first thread I posted was the name change upon marriage question. Wow, I was instantly flooded with feedback about that situation. And the responses helped me by making me more aware of the reasons behind all that. Now, it did not cause me to LIKE the whole idea, but it did expand my AWARENESS, and so it helps me to come to better terms within myself. But, I think that anyone who exists, who has any type of absolute "core belief", is not likely to change their mind, whether theres five, or, five thousand who disagree with them. But, my own experience has been that when I was by myself, it was a lot easier and simpler to be a "one way--closed minded" type of person. But when you are in a serious relationship with another person, all that changes, or at least, it needs to change. So, to sum up here, this forum has been helpful to me, and has provided entertainment value as well. Thanks for listening, and take care all.
Under the heading Relationships I would assume its an advice column where people come togather to exchange ideas and experiances and to offer help to those in need.
My question is this: Do you think that most people given the opportunity to improve their situation would explore other approaches to lifes problems or do you think they are looking for advice that validates what they are already doing?
The cornerstone of good critical thinking is to be objective: A third party sees what is often invisible to those living it. Usually someone removed from the relationshoip sees more clearly.
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I've found that the longer your paragraph looks in a post, the more intimidating and less likely people will sit there and read through the whole thing. 
My thoughts
