Friends versus Spouse (dating, how to, women, kid)

[useasdirected]

Originally Posted by Djuna

And this is the reason FB shouldn't be used by adults

Can you facebook that to me?

[crisan]

OP, it is not easy dealing with opinionated people. Yet it seems we all have opinions. You shared your opinions about a city and people shared their opinions about you.

I think for the most part you can be proud of your behavior. Your opinion did not become personal, e.g. calling somebody negative or unfriending a person on facebook.

I think the best advice given so far as been this, to act like nothing happened. Don't act defensive and you don't have to defend anything.

I have unfriended people for less but when I met them the next time, I acted like nothing happened.

[srjth]

Originally Posted by Book Lover 21

I love St. Louis, but really, provel cheese IS crap (and something a lot of Saint Louisans seem to be overly sensitive about...)

Also, I have yet to find a good Mexican restaurant.

But back to the main point of discussion. Your wife should be on YOUR team. Unfriending you should be the same thing as unfriending her. You are a team.

What in the world is provel cheese?

*ponders opening a mexican restaurant in st. louis*

[Prince_Frog]

Originally Posted by srjth

What in the world is provel cheese?

*ponders opening a mexican restaurant in st. louis*

It's a processed cheese produced with Cheddar, swiss and provolone.

Provel cheese - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Sometimes I make love to google and it gives me all the right answers.

[JanND]

Originally Posted by scocar

I get the silliness of the situation. I thought I addressed that in my first sentence. I'm not looking for responses regarding the conflict. I'm looking for advice from people that have had situations where they had to deal with having any conflict with their spouses best friends. The explanation in the post was just to give background to the conflict.

I get you. If these folks are becoming your wife's best friends, you feel awkward now because htey were so ridiculous. It seems petty, and if you never saqw them again you probably wouldn't have even tried to explain yourself to them, you did so only because they are becoming impotant to your wife. Here is my tak...you and your wife need to meet others, not limit yourselves to this couple....because for me there is some underlying issue here, otherwise why would they be such dweebs. Your wife needs to be less involved w/ these folks, especially since they are so immature. So, talk to your wife, don't tell her you don't want her to see them, but share how you feel undermined by their immature attack. I really don't like facebook much, I joined last year because my daughter begged me too. And I've spent the last year watching my daughter and my son, both who live states away engage w/ their friends daily, bantering etc. which is fine....but seldom even do more than very occasionally say something on my wall. It sort of made me feel left out, and I had never felt that way before facebook about my adult children, So, now I come to the forum......lol. OP, discuss w/ your wife that you hope that you two will find some folks that have mutual interests that they share w/ both of you. Hopefully she will be supportive. Not a biggie, but if facebook banter sets them off who knows what they would do in person sometime.

[scocar]

Originally Posted by bouncethelight

Of course I've ready your posts in this thread. I'm wondering now if you really want any opinions, but I came into this thread and read every word.

In fact, you yourself wrote, in the very first post....





Your posts sure made it sound as though your wife, and even you, were still socializing with them normally...

Good luck with this.

Sorry for the confusion then. The part about me not seeing them for a month and my wife seeing them 3-4 times was prior to the FB post. It was to emphasize that I had not been around them recently to annoy them.

[JanND]

Well, ok. Since you have clarified that your wife isn't continuing to hang out with them after they blasted you on facebook, then un-friended you, everything I've said was moot. So, why are you still concerned if they aren't hanging out w/ either of you now?? What is the issue??

[Hobokenkitchen]

Originally Posted by scocar

Sorry for the confusion then. The part about me not seeing them for a month and my wife seeing them 3-4 times was prior to the FB post. It was to emphasize that I had not been around them recently to annoy them.

Ahhhhhhh, that makes more sense. So they have now cut off both you AND your wife?

Originally Posted by JanND

Well, ok. Since you have clarified that your wife isn't continuing to hang out with them after they blasted you on facebook, then un-friended you, everything I've said was moot. So, why are you still concerned if they aren't hanging out w/ either of you now?? What is the issue??

I guess the 'issue' is that he feels bad that a close friendship is now gone and that it effects his wife as well as himself?

I'm not 100% sure where the friends vs spouse part comes in as he hasn't clarified how his wife is dealing with the situation. Maybe she is giving him a hard time?

I still don't blame him at all for being upset. Those people sound unbalanced.

[scocar]

This all happened late last week. So I don't know how it's going to play out. My wife is sort of trying to play peacemaker. She has e-mailed both of them. She went out with the wife the night that it happened, but they did not discuss it at all. The night out was planned before the FB post. My wife said the evening was awkward because the blast was like an elephant in the room. I have e-mailed both parties questioning what went on, and letting them know that my wife is pretty upset about the potential of this impacting our friendship. As I've stated my efforts have been met with silence and being unfriended. My wife has stated that they have not responded to her either regarding her e-mails.

Yes I'm somewhat disappointed that my wife has attempted to justify their actions by stating that sometimes I try to be funny by poking fun and it might have annoyed them. She also is not as angry and outspoken as I would have been if one of my friends had done that to her. But she's not me. She is more of a counselor type that just wants everything fixed.

[ChessieMom]

Originally Posted by cpg35223

Possibly. But if the OP is to be taken at his word, something cotton-picking weird is afoot here. Something out of the ordinary is taking place. Because normal people don't lash out at even-handed critiques of restaurants on Yelp unless there's a motivating factor.

Yup. Me thinks something is afoot.

If the OP's wife, and the OP, are no longer keeping company with these clowns, then I don't see that there is anything to resolve. Let 'em go.