really confused (guy, kids, call, feelings)

[pims26]

Originally Posted by Sweetlilac

It's fun.

Its lots of pressure to be something you're not.

[Sweetlilac]

Originally Posted by pims26

I don't know what sexure is but I being fake 24/7 is not my idea of a life.

Putting on make up is being fake? Awww.

I'm going on a cruise with my boyfriend in a couple of weeks, there will be plenty of dressing up opportunities *drools at the thought of wearing sexy gowns and lingerie underneath* (or being fake as you'd interpret it). I so look forward to it.

[Percentage]

Originally Posted by pims26

I don't know what sexure is but I being fake 24/7 is not my idea of a life.

How is that being fake 24/7? You know what...nevermind!

[Sweetlilac]

Originally Posted by pims26

Its lots of pressure to be something you're not.

Okie dok. I'm going to jump in the shower and become someone I'm not. Brb~

[pims26]

Originally Posted by lonelyhousewife

this guy and I have been talking via facebook and by phone for about 5 months. We are both 33 now and hadnt seen each other since high school. We made plans for the weekend we spent together so it wasnt just a sporatic hookup.

Therein lies the problem.
People change in some ways as they grow up, especially from school days to their 30's.
People who "communicate" via non-face to face means miss out on lots of signals, subtle signs and cues. Humans where never meant to communicate long distance, as its not communicating.

You're possibly still "living in you school days" when you think of him and this is what drives you to re-kindle things with him.
He may feel the same but may not.
You need to find out but I wouldn't make more than 1 effort to contact him before getting a response.
He has to meet you 50% of the way, otherwise there is no equitable relationship.

This is not nice, but maybe he changed his mind after he met you but took the chance for sex while it was available (as most men will do).
The hugging for 30 mins before parting could be that he is still in the aftermath of being with your body for x hours.

The test is how he responds afterwards and you need to get that in the cold harsh way of waiting.

[pims26]

Originally Posted by Sweetlilac

Okie dok. I'm going to jump in the shower and become someone I'm not. Brb~

I wasn't clear before. I wasn't talking about cleaning, which is normal.
Its doing make up before someone wakes up to present to them something you're not, which is the problem.
This is not healthy behavior and shows that you are worried about being accepted (not uncommon).

[ChessieMom]

Originally Posted by lonelyhousewife

I'm sorry ( i'm no longer married) this guy and I have been talking via facebook and by phone for about 5 months. We are both 33 now and hadnt seen each other since high school. We made plans for the weekend we spent together so it wasnt just a sporatic hookup.

It was a sporadic sexual encounter. You already said as much in your first post. You need to give it a few days. I think sleeping with the guy was a huge mistake...and only time will tell if he has any intentions as to wanting to see more of you. I can't tell you any more than that.

[brokensky]

Did you drive the 400 plus miles to visit him in his hometown and you stayed in a hotel? Or did you all both meet somewhere and each get hotel rooms?

I am trying to get a sense of his level of interest in meeting up with you again (how much effort he had to put into making the get together happen).

[supermanpansy]

Originally Posted by lonelyhousewife

I am currently involved in a long distance relationship with a guy I went to high school with. We are now and until this weekend it had been 14 years since seeing each other last. We live 473 miles away from each other and have talked about moving closer to each other and I thought it was a go. I spent this weekend with him although I was unsure of things so I rented a room and did things the old fashioned date style. We had a good time and being that the chemistry was there we slept together. I went back to my hotel room and slept so that I could go back home the next morning. We had a long goodbye and he held me for about 30 minutes and kissed me. I got home yesterday and while we normally communicate through text and calls several times a day, I have only heard from him once and Im getting nervous. Im not sure if this is normal and im just overthinking things or if I have cause for concern.

It sounds like he is trying to play it cool. Now that he slept with you he might even feel like he has the upper hand..Why? I don't know. But he might just be trying to play it cool by not calling too much and acting like he doesn't really care. I'm a guy. Guy's and girls do play these games. He must think you really like him since you slept with him so he feels he has the upper hand right now. Not to say that can't switch at any time. He figures if he makes you wait for his call-you will want him more..Seems a little like games to me. He's probably insecure and has figured you play hard to get and someone wants you more...He's wrong. Truthfully, it can turn someone off, especially someone who is tired of games.

You might have been down that sad "game playing" road in the past and you are just ready for a normal non-game playing guy..In this day and age there is really no excuse for not calling someone. Everyone has a time where they can call someone. Especially since everyone's got a cell phone...I wouldn't overreact and act mad. You'd be falling right into his ploy..I would just not call him and see how he likes it. If he's even worth it..Figure out where you stand on game playing and if this is what you want.. Good luck...


Smp

[lovesMountains]

Originally Posted by lonelyhousewife

I am currently involved in a long distance relationship with a guy I went to high school with. We are now and until this weekend it had been 14 years since seeing each other last. We live 473 miles away from each other and have talked about moving closer to each other and I thought it was a go. I spent this weekend with him although I was unsure of things so I rented a room and did things the old fashioned date style. We had a good time and being that the chemistry was there we slept together. I went back to my hotel room and slept so that I could go back home the next morning. We had a long goodbye and he held me for about 30 minutes and kissed me. I got home yesterday and while we normally communicate through text and calls several times a day, I have only heard from him once and Im getting nervous. Im not sure if this is normal and im just overthinking things or if I have cause for concern.

It's only been 24 hours - give him a chance to breathe

I would think in a situation like this both parties have a lot to consider, he just may need some time.

Don't go all clingy and needy on him right now - that could really backfire on you.

Just try to be patient and see what develops!