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I can't understand why so many people seem to accept lying. That is what this man did; he lied. The reasons don't matter.
OP,
You have been at a disadvantage because you didn't have all of the information. This guy led you to believe that he was legally free to pursue a relationship with you and he was not. He did not give you the option to continue to see him or not. He should have just told you the truth and let you make the decision.
A lie is a lie, a lie, a lie. Who can trust a liar? He should have told the truth and let her decide whether she wanted to date.
I dont see it as a lie. All he did was say he was divorced, which he basically is. I guess it mostly depends on your definition of divorced! The way I see it, if I want nothing to do with the women, dont sleep with her, dont care to ever see her again, am I married?!? NO! I am divorced. Even if there isn't a piece of paper for it. Just my $.02
I dont see it as a lie. All he did was say he was divorced, which he basically is. I guess it mostly depends on your definition of divorced! The way I see it, if I want nothing to do with the women, dont sleep with her, dont care to ever see her again, am I married?!? NO! I am divorced. Even if there isn't a piece of paper for it. Just my $.02
No he basically isn't. He is not divorced at all. Until his papers and his wife's papers have been filed, and the divorce made legal, he is not "basically" divorced.
What is your definition of divorced? My definition of divorced is that the guy is legally divorced.
OP, I would be careful around this one. Who knows what his real legal status is, he may be lying about his wife filing the paperwork. Or he may have gotten his lies mixed up (when lying to different women).
No he basically isn't. He is not divorced at all. Until his papers and his wife's papers have been filed, and the divorce made legal, he is not "basically" divorced.
What is your definition of divorced? My definition of divorced is that the guy is legally divorced.
OP, I would be careful around this one. Who knows what his real legal status is, he may be lying about his wife filing the paperwork. Or he may have gotten his lies mixed up (when lying to different women).
If the OP was thinking from a legal standpoint, I can understand it being considered a lie. If we are talking about an emotional, companionship type of relationship, then he is divorced. I see it as, he is divorced emotionally, but just not legally yet. Of course the OP better be sure that he is going through the paperwork to get it handled before getting serious. We all know how long and lengthy divorces can be at times, so I don't think its fair to avoid someone just because they haven't been divorced legally.
I dont see it as a lie. All he did was say he was divorced, which he basically is. I guess it mostly depends on your definition of divorced! The way I see it, if I want nothing to do with the women, dont sleep with her, dont care to ever see her again, am I married?!? NO! I am divorced. Even if there isn't a piece of paper for it. Just my $.02
Well, it was a lie. Whether it was a small one or a large one is between the two people involved, and it appears from the OP that it was viewed as minor. If she's fine with the defacto divorce who am I to judge?
But, of course all of the stone throwers here will say they have never have lied. Of course you have you have never lied. I have found that the biggest stone throwers are the biggest hypocrites.
Telling someone your divorced implies legally. He is legally married, even if seperated and going through a divorce. So he lied. Otherwise, the correct thing for him to say is that he is seperated and going through the divorce process.
You would only tell someone you ARE divorced, before the divorce is completed, if you are trying to mislead them.
Well, it was a lie. Whether it was a small one or a large one is between the two people involved, and it appears from the OP that it was viewed as minor....
She didn't view it as minor. She has been pondering this, her gut is telling her something stinks, and she posted here to voice her concern. I hope she doesn't fall for his con job.
I met a man on the NJ transit, on my way to meet another guy I was dating. Long story short, I wind up taking his number and breaking it off with the other guy I was seeing. He's a train conductor working 55 hours a week.
He seems really kind and generous. Upfront he told me that he was divorced with two small children (4 and 6), but had a good relationship with his ex. He didn't seem to have a lot of time and we spent the first few months interacting mainly over phone call and texts, daily. Finally we started hanging out on a regular basis, but I told him I had doubts about it working out because he seems to work so much and has his children half the week. He told me to not give up on the two of us, and that he would make more time for me.
We had a great night last night, going out to dinner and to his local bar. Then he told me he was stressed, saying his divorce was getting delayed because his wife had misfiled the paperwork in an offhand manner. I said, "I thought you were already divorced." He stammered for a bit and said, "Oh well, the paperwork's in there."
This really isn't a huge deal to me, since I know he is fully separated and not with her (she lives in a condo with another man)...but why did he just not say that his divorce wasn't final yet. Why just say he was divorced, when he wasn't yet? This is really bothering me.
Ladies if a man is lying from jump street and going through a divorce why do you still date him? Get ready because going forward it's all drama..Possible Alimony and child support for two kids... SMH I will never understand women..
I met a man on the NJ transit, on my way to meet another guy I was dating. Long story short, I wind up taking his number and breaking it off with the other guy I was seeing. He's a train conductor working 55 hours a week.
He seems really kind and generous. Upfront he told me that he was divorced with two small children (4 and 6), but had a good relationship with his ex. He didn't seem to have a lot of time and we spent the first few months interacting mainly over phone call and texts, daily. Finally we started hanging out on a regular basis, but I told him I had doubts about it working out because he seems to work so much and has his children half the week. He told me to not give up on the two of us, and that he would make more time for me.
We had a great night last night, going out to dinner and to his local bar. Then he told me he was stressed, saying his divorce was getting delayed because his wife had misfiled the paperwork in an offhand manner. I said, "I thought you were already divorced." He stammered for a bit and said, "Oh well, the paperwork's in there."
This really isn't a huge deal to me, since I know he is fully separated and not with her (she lives in a condo with another man)...but why did he just not say that his divorce wasn't final yet. Why just say he was divorced, when he wasn't yet? This is really bothering me.
Hi beautiful
Long time no see. Hope you are doing well.
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, on my way to meet another guy I was dating. Long story short, I wind up taking his number and breaking it off with the other guy I was seeing. He's a train conductor working 55 hours a week.
