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Unread 01-23-2012, 11:28 AM
 
Location: England
1,169 posts, read 1,299,268 times
Reputation: 954
Quote:
Originally Posted by Caltovegas View Post
Men don't do the love thing like women. Men may get hit with the emotional thing once and going forward it depends on how the woman treats him. If a woman breaks a mans heart once all women to an extent will have to pay after that..

Women can get their heart broken many times and bounce back. For men it's once and after that your a fool. I guess in the big picture it's not so much of men being afraid of falling in love it's women wanting to define how a man should act when in love.. If a man is providing for you and the kids he loves you at some level because if not he wouldn't care.
So, in the case of a guy who has been hurt.....and is terrified of getting hurt again.....does the woman need to make MORE of the running? How would this guy feel if the woman expressed how SHE felt about HIM? Would it help him? Would it put him off? Would it put more pressure on him?

Do men share their feelings about being scared and in love with their friends?

Or is that unmanly?

Women do get scared too....thats true....but the spotlight is on the men here...so men feel free and thanks for expressing your views so well!
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Unread 01-23-2012, 11:30 AM
 
Location: SWUS
5,307 posts, read 3,696,913 times
Reputation: 5528
Quote:
Originally Posted by mir86 View Post
Its scary for women too. I hate showing emotion and being vulnerable and love brings all of that out and that is scary.

just quoting this because it's the same for me, too... the feeling of vulnerability is the worst.
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Unread 01-23-2012, 11:31 AM
 
Location: Katonah, NY
14,481 posts, read 6,392,127 times
Reputation: 14153
Quote:
Originally Posted by jennaflorrie View Post
So, in the case of a guy who has been hurt.....and is terrified of getting hurt again.....does the woman need to make MORE of the running? How would this guy feel if the woman expressed how SHE felt about HIM? Would it help him? Would it put him off? Would it put more pressure on him?

Do men share their feelings about being scared and in love with their friends?

Or is that unmanly?

Women do get scared too....thats true....but the spotlight is on the men here...so men feel free and thanks for expressing your views so well!
But all men are different. Just because this guy feels this way - that in no way means that ALL men feel that way.

The only person who can tell you how they are really feeling is the person themselves. If you are having an issue with a man - he is the only one that really knows what's going on. He is the only one you should really be talking to about this.
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Unread 01-23-2012, 11:33 AM
 
Location: New Jersey
8,333 posts, read 3,701,164 times
Reputation: 6822
they don't get that overly invested in the first place.
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Unread 01-23-2012, 12:11 PM
 
Location: Brooklyn,NY
6,630 posts, read 3,836,831 times
Reputation: 8529
Default The NRE!

This phenomena also. "New relationship energy" is one great thing though. You feel like you could move any mountain! That brain chemistry thing again. That winds down over time of course, And one can start to question the future. It's only natural that "kismet" feeling gives way to comfort. the opposite polar effect is there too. Anyone in a relationship or marriage knows that feeling of knowing it is slipping away. it is like being in hell.

It is amazing how the brain and emotion can act. It really is.

This thread is making me think a lot. 4 years +, Since i felt either above. Whoa.
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Unread 01-23-2012, 12:15 PM
 
Location: SF Bay Area
10,602 posts, read 4,855,692 times
Reputation: 7718
I think some do. Not all though.
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Unread 01-23-2012, 01:53 PM
 
Location: Brooklyn,NY
6,630 posts, read 3,836,831 times
Reputation: 8529
Default NRE revisited.

Quote:
Originally Posted by D. Scott View Post
This phenomena also. "New relationship energy" is one great thing though. You feel like you could move any mountain! That brain chemistry thing again. That winds down over time of course, And one can start to question the future. It's only natural that "kismet" feeling gives way to comfort. the opposite polar effect is there too. Anyone in a relationship or marriage knows that feeling of knowing it is slipping away. it is like being in hell.

It is amazing how the brain and emotion can act. It really is.

This thread is making me think a lot. 4 years +, Since i felt either above. Whoa.
Has anyone ever gotten this rush reconciling with an ex? I wonder...Have no experience to go on personally.
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Unread 01-23-2012, 02:52 PM
 
2,347 posts, read 1,068,203 times
Reputation: 1923
Yes, because I realize life isn't a fairy tale. I'm not taking such a big risk when I'm not ready to deal with the high possibility of failure.
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Unread 01-23-2012, 03:25 PM
 
1,210 posts, read 562,874 times
Reputation: 906
Quote:
Originally Posted by jennaflorrie View Post
OK Men - this one is for you. A lot of ladies will be interested in your replies I am sure. Imagine, a guy falls deeply in love with a lady......big time.....does he get scared? Does it make him feel INSECURE and afraid? And if so why? Men are meant to be the big macho ones - but I think they have to hide a a lot of their feelings and being in love must make them feel pretty vulnerable, especially if they have been hurt previously. Thanks for your replies!
If he's scared he's not right for you. A woman can't do anything with a chump. All he can do is give good guys, a bad reputation.
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Unread 01-23-2012, 04:27 PM
 
Location: England
1,169 posts, read 1,299,268 times
Reputation: 954
Quote:
Originally Posted by Just1Fan View Post
If he's scared he's not right for you. A woman can't do anything with a chump. All he can do is give good guys, a bad reputation.
Sometimes its the chumps that aren't scared.....they just saunter right in there.....no fear, because they have no brains...lol....

But hopefully, a man can conquer his fears to get the prize of True Love......but perhaps men don't believe in true love? No, they do....they are softies underneath all that bravado.......what you think?
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