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Old 01-28-2012, 07:16 AM
 
Location: Plover, WI
420 posts, read 434,663 times
Reputation: 413

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I love cuddling, but when I'm sleeping we're not cuddling.
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Old 01-28-2012, 07:41 AM
 
Location: Maryland not Murlin
7,513 posts, read 14,666,153 times
Reputation: 4741
Quote:
Originally Posted by VTHokieFan View Post
I've been seeing this girl for about 3 weeks now and whenever we've slept over at each others places, she lays on top of me in a cuddling way when we go to sleep. How does she think I'm supposed to sleep with her 120ish pound body on my chest? I guess I'm just a cold person? Maybe I'm weird? I just don't like to be touched regardless of how I feel about someone, and I do have feelings for her. Any other guys like this?

I can understand needing to "deal" with this when/if I get married, but at 3 weeks my mantra is: "I have work the next day, we're *done*, you're sober, it's only 10PM, your house is 5 miles away....go home."

Is my behavior odd?
I don't mind being touched, but I am also not into cuddling....especially when my GF insists on lying on top of me. Why she believes she is light as a feather is beyond me, let alone why she thinks putting all of her weight on my chest results in a nice, comfy, feeling

I like to feel another's skin and have their body near mine. I love sleeping next to a warm body. I like having someone there. I just do not like cuddling when I am trying to sleep. I find cuddling puts my body in positions that are uncomfortable to fall asleep in.

I don't think you are weird by this post. Especially at only three weeks.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DRGirl View Post
Most of women love cuddling.
...and most men do not

Quote:
Originally Posted by JetJockey View Post
My view is that once you're having sex on a regular basis or are in a relationship of some sort it's extremely rude to kick them out after having sex.
Whether it is rude or not is based on the individual. Ideally, the two involved would either agree that such behavior is rude, or that it is not.

Personally, I would hardly consider anything at three weeks to be "a regular basis" or "in a relationship".
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Old 01-28-2012, 08:05 AM
 
406 posts, read 357,210 times
Reputation: 505
Quote:
Originally Posted by sierraAZ View Post
Statistically, you're not that strange, in general. Her way of "cuddling" certainly is, though! Never heard of anybody "cuddling" by spreading herself on top of a man for an extended period of time.
exactly. I'm a woman, and I'm not much into cuddling. I tend to turn my back to the person I'm in bed with.... with my ex, we 'cuddled' for maybe (maybe) five minutes after sex. towards the end of our marriage, not even that long. ha! With my new husband, I turn away from him, and he'll snuggle up next to me while falling asleep, but soon he's moved over and found his own room on the bed in which to get comfortable.

I guess more women like to cuddle than men? or maybe this is a myth? I know plenty of women who do NOT like to cuddle....and even when cuddling, I've never spread my body on top of another. That's not my idea of cuddling.
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Old 01-28-2012, 03:29 PM
 
3,153 posts, read 1,972,570 times
Reputation: 4054
if I had to define cuddling (or paint a picture) it would be the guy laying on his side, the girl doing the same (her back pressed against his chest), and the guy's arm draped over her.
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Old 01-28-2012, 11:40 PM
 
1,219 posts, read 744,490 times
Reputation: 913
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alanboy395 View Post
If she don't like it, she can hit the door anytime but I don't consider his actions emotional abuse.
When he wants to have sex, she usually gives it. But, when she wants to cuddle, he doesn't care. Well, what about her needs? Don't they matter? That's just his way of controlling her emotions, while only considering his own. It's O.K. for now. But, how is he going to feel later, when she starts cuddling with someone else? That's why it doesn't hurt to cuddle, every now and then.
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Old 01-28-2012, 11:52 PM
 
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,510 posts, read 12,058,337 times
Reputation: 9109
Quote:
Originally Posted by photobuff42 View Post
In the end, she is going to wind up unhappy, Hokie. Perhaps you need to ask your next girlfriend if she into cuddling before you have sex.

My former bf didn't like it. I almost always felt unfulfilled. The new love does like to cuddle; he probably enjoys it more than I do. His cuddles make me feel cared for and I get to feel his strength through that simple act. The difference is amazing! Not only do I feel better about this relationship and where we are going with it, but I am less stressed, too!

But it may be that you can just shift her into a cuddle position that is acceptable to both of you. Would that solve the problem?

If it's a real relationship, you have to fulfill her needs, just like you want yours fulfilled.


Good luck!
Yes! If you mean physical strength, that's probably my favorite thing about it, the power in a man's body. You can feel it while making love too, of course, but that's different. Might sound corny but it's a wonderful feeling.
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Old 01-29-2012, 12:02 AM
 
Location: Southern California
12,596 posts, read 9,532,417 times
Reputation: 8246
Cuddling is okay and even better if she doesn't mind mission creep from time-to-time.
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Old 01-29-2012, 12:29 AM
 
5,073 posts, read 2,784,450 times
Reputation: 5313
yeah, like 99.9% of men on this planet..... The other 0.01% have cats, which makes them gay
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Old 01-29-2012, 04:04 AM
 
Location: The Midst of Insanity
3,225 posts, read 4,206,340 times
Reputation: 3101
Well, I'm a female and I actually don't care for cuddling (except for when I'm depressed or upset about something). Not all of us women want to smother you guys!
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Old 01-29-2012, 05:18 AM
 
1,756 posts, read 1,378,602 times
Reputation: 1604
Quote:
Originally Posted by VTHokieFan View Post
I've been seeing this girl for about 3 weeks now and whenever we've slept over at each others places, she lays on top of me in a cuddling way when we go to sleep. How does she think I'm supposed to sleep with her 120ish pound body on my chest? I guess I'm just a cold person? Maybe I'm weird? I just don't like to be touched regardless of how I feel about someone, and I do have feelings for her. Any other guys like this?

I can understand needing to "deal" with this when/if I get married, but at 3 weeks my mantra is: "I have work the next day, we're *done*, you're sober, it's only 10PM, your house is 5 miles away....go home."

Is my behavior odd?
Are you kidding me?!? after-cuddling is the best part of the whole sex experience...
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