U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 1.5 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Jump to a detailed profile or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Business Search - 14 Million verified businesses
Search for:  near: 
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 01-31-2012, 11:13 AM
 
658 posts, read 660,876 times
Reputation: 719

Advertisements

While I have no preference when it comes to the races of my friends, I do find certain races more attractive. The "no preference" line could be real, or could be just a white lie, people want to come across as liberal-minded and polite (while avoiding potential conflicts from haters) and I wouldn't blame them for that.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 01-31-2012, 11:21 AM
 
Location: 'Murica
1,278 posts, read 1,413,960 times
Reputation: 706
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shankapotomus View Post
Perhaps what confuses you is culture. For instance, someone might specify they have no racial preference but that does not mean they don't have cultural preferences.

One can favor a particular culture and not be racist since people of any race can be raised or adopt a culture of another country. For instance, if you are ethnically white but were born and raised in Japan, culturally, you are Japanese. And I don't think there is anything wrong with having such cultural preferences. It's like investigating which country you prefer. It's based on the laws, customs, socio-economic landscape, not race.
This. I probably have more in common with someone who grew up in a small town outside Atlanta than someone who just arrived from Asia, despite the racial characteristics.

When I first created my match profile, I thought about just selecting Latina, Middle-Eastern, White, and Asian for my racial preferences, but I immediately realized how silly it was to pick and choose something relatively trivial.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-31-2012, 11:35 AM
 
Location: Massachusetts
527 posts, read 467,210 times
Reputation: 539
Quote:
Originally Posted by LS Jaun View Post
I could go with that. With out thinking about it I have indicated just Black and White women in the past, but I was probably eliminating others? It was most likely a Mcsteak. Who knows maybe I missed a great Samoan woman!
That reminds me of an email I got in Match a few months ago. I always read their profiles before answering, so I went in to check what he had to say. Under preferences, he had only "Caucasian" and "Never Married." I emailed him back and told him I was a divorced Latina, lol. He apologized and said he really didn't put any thought into it and that he was open to dating any single woman he found attractive/compatible. So sometimes people put one thing without thinking much about it. BTW, We went on a date and it was nice. I had a good time.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-31-2012, 11:50 AM
 
Location: Tucson
42,844 posts, read 54,411,827 times
Reputation: 22789
Quote:
Originally Posted by DRGirl View Post
That reminds me of an email I got in Match a few months ago. I always read their profiles before answering, so I went in to check what he had to say. Under preferences, he had only "Caucasian" and "Never Married." I emailed him back and told him I was a divorced Latina, lol. He apologized and said he really didn't put any thought into it and that he was open to dating any single woman he found attractive/compatible. So sometimes people put one thing without thinking much about it. BTW, We went on a date and it was nice. I had a good time.
I don't believe this is true. He put thought into it. The thing is he liked your picture. Pictures mess up things a lot, unfortunately...
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-31-2012, 12:11 PM
 
Location: USA
9,715 posts, read 5,143,379 times
Reputation: 7285
Quote:
Originally Posted by DRGirl View Post
That reminds me of an email I got in Match a few months ago. I always read their profiles before answering, so I went in to check what he had to say. Under preferences, he had only "Caucasian" and "Never Married." I emailed him back and told him I was a divorced Latina, lol. He apologized and said he really didn't put any thought into it and that he was open to dating any single woman he found attractive/compatible. So sometimes people put one thing without thinking much about it. BTW, We went on a date and it was nice. I had a good time.
Love it, All that really counts is that you had a good time . Check back and see if he changed his requirements. I’ve had woman do this with they’re age requirement as I usually look at 30-45 range. I will find someone that says they are 33 and are looking for men 30-35. I'll do a Hi with a comment and statement that I'm out of their age at 39. Invariably, I'll get a comment back saying they arbitrarily set it where it was so they don't get any old men but I'm ok and they will reset they criteria?

I'd have to go with Sierra on the picture statement for some of the same reasons "Predetermined mental image of what someone looks like" vs. "What they really look like".
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-31-2012, 12:28 PM
 
Location: Baltimore, MD
3,768 posts, read 4,079,822 times
Reputation: 4752
Quote:
Originally Posted by sierraAZ View Post
I don't believe this is true. He put thought into it. The thing is he liked your picture.
Very true. If they like what they see, they will forget about their so-called requirements.

When I was online dating, I specifically checked off that I was agnostic and looking for the same. I got tons of messages from so-called "god fearing Christians" whose profile requirements also said they wanted a Christian girl. I questioned a few of them on if they actually read my profile and saw that I was no Christian. Their answer? Well, tsuddenly they aren't that strict.

Whatever!

I even let one take me out while he grilled me on my non -religious beliefs. I politely answered all his questions while feasting on my lobster dinner.

Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-31-2012, 12:31 PM
 
Location: Center of the universe
23,932 posts, read 20,329,560 times
Reputation: 11212
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rwarky View Post
In today's world of online dating I 've notice a common occurence, many people like to say they have "no preference" when it comes to a person's race. I'm often confused by this notion, and left wondering if they are being truthful.

In this thread let's try to discover if there is any truth to this pattern. Do you prefer one particular race, more than one race but not all of them, or have "no preference" in a potential mate?
Like others say - I have never had any preference in terms of race.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-31-2012, 12:32 PM
 
Location: Washington, DC area
579 posts, read 523,402 times
Reputation: 659
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rwarky View Post
In today's world of online dating I 've notice a common occurence, many people like to say they have "no preference" when it comes to a person's race. I'm often confused by this notion, and left wondering if they are being truthful.

In this thread let's try to discover if there is any truth to this pattern. Do you prefer one particular race, more than one race but not all of them, or have "no preference" in a potential mate?
Personally, race isn't a big factor in choosing who I date. I'd prefer to date someone of my own race, but more importantly, I want to date (and eventually marry) someone I find attractive, get along with and share common values. I'd say I'm race-flexible, lol. I would think that more young people would select "no preference" when it comes to race. Growing up, I knew plenty of mixed race kids w/ great parents who got along well. It was much more difficult to be a mixed race couple in my parent's and grandparent's generations.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-31-2012, 12:32 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,844 posts, read 54,411,827 times
Reputation: 22789
Quote:
Originally Posted by Miss Crabcakes View Post
Very true. If they like what they see, they will forget about their so-called requirements.

When I was online dating, I specifically checked off that I was agnostic and looking for the same. I got tons of messages from so-called "god fearing Christians" whose profile requirements also said they wanted a Christian girl. I questioned a few of them on if they actually read my profile and saw that I was no Christian. Their answer? Well, tsuddenly they aren't that strict.
And soon they will be again! Pictures create big problems. Incompatibilities are brushed off at first and resurface later, sure enough.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-31-2012, 12:48 PM
 
Location: Center of the universe
23,932 posts, read 20,329,560 times
Reputation: 11212
Quote:
Originally Posted by LS Jaun View Post
I could go with that. With out thinking about it I have indicated just Black and White women in the past, but I was probably eliminating others? It was most likely a Mcsteak. Who knows maybe I missed a great Samoan woman!
The ones I have known are sweet and loving.......but don't **** 'em off!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $84,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 08:37 PM.

2005-2014, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25 - Top