Thoughts on "Mars and Venus on a Date" (dating, women)

[katykat01]

My friend suggested that I read this book because she thought it would be helpful in finding the right person for me. I've been single and out of the dating scene for a few years, so I thought, "why not?"

Now that I'm reading it, I find some of it really questionable. Like, guys just want to make women happy and feel fulfillment in making women happy. I'm not a guy, so I don't know. Is this true?

[Ascension2012]

no

[Phoenix2017]

If a guy really and truly loves a woman very deeply, it can be a pleasure and a delight for him to make the woman he is involved romantically with feel happy and fulfilled

[katykat01]

Thanks, Knight. But also for the pursuit aspect when they don't really know each other? Is there also the pleasure of pleasing her just in pursuing her and her being receptive to the pursuit?

[Phoenix2017]

Originally Posted by katykat01

Thanks, Knight. But also for the pursuit aspect when they don't really know each other? Is there also the pleasure of pleasing her just in pursuing her and her being receptive to the pursuit?

In my own personal experience (when I was still actively dating anyway), it genuinely made me feel happy to also be able to make the woman I was dating happy as well. It wasn't even really an issue of making her happy solely for the sake of "pursuing her", either...my interest was in trying to have her like me better, and feel more comfortable around me. More than anything else, it had to do with wanting to gradually over time earn and win her affections, and her heart. I will admit, alas this strategy did prove unsuccessful much more often than not for me, though...

[TaoistDude]

I think there is a distinction between an ongoing dating situation and dating to find someone to keep dating. I've read another of his books, and the premise is the same, but I suspect the author is mainly talking about a stable dating relationship. In that case, I do agree with the idea.

[katykat01]

Interesting. Thank you, both!

Btw, Knight, your approach has certainly paid off! Don't worry about the ones who rejected you.

[Keeper]

I read the book a long time ago but I do believe there were some very good points made when it comes to relationships. I think you can take some of his ideas while dating but not all will apply.

[Phoenix2017]

Originally Posted by katykat01

Interesting. Thank you, both!

Btw, Knight, your approach has certainly paid off! Don't worry about the ones who rejected you.

Many thanks for your very kind compliment above, my friend katy! ((hugs))

[katykat01]

A hug to you too, Knight!