For Men With Children - Paternity Test; Child Not Yours? (how to, loving)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Again I think by law everyone should have to get a paternity test from the very beginning.
It would stop dead beat dad's who donate sperm to every Cindy, Sally and Sue. It would prevent women lying to husbands that it's his child while she hopped on every Tom, Dick and Harry.
It would be greatly appreciated in the medical field. Diseases that are past down from each parent. And allergies, adhd, autistic, asburgers, etc. Blood types. Immune deficiencies. Heart disease.
It really would help out everything. Why isn't allowed or already done? The government. Do you know how many children are not the governer's, sentator's, and such. I really think every man and woman should get it done.
It really would help out everything. Why isn't allowed or already done? The government. Do you know how many children are not the governer's, sentator's, and such. I really think every man and woman should get it done.
Well nobody is stopping those who choose to have it done.
I don't think it needs to be "required". If one is in doubt...they can pay to have it done
It really would help out everything. Why isn't allowed or already done? The government. Do you know how many children are not the governer's, sentator's, and such. I really think every man and woman should get it done.
Quote:
Originally Posted by *Sixy*
Well nobody is stopping those who choose to have it done.
I don't think it needs to be "required". If one is in doubt...they can pay to have it done
Agreed. And I'll add to that -
1. The hospital's purpose is to take care of the health of the patient/s - not to get mixed up in their personal lives.
2. Who's going to pay for it? Insurance companies? Yeah - right!
3. How would it work? There are lots of single moms - how would they have a mandatory paternity test? What if they don't even know who the father is? Would every single person in the world have to give a willing DNA swab so that it could be compared to any possible child that they might have? Would you only have it mandatory if there is a father listed on the birth certificate? If so - then it's not really mandatory, right? Maybe people would just stop listing a father to avoid any hassle.
4. I think a lot of people would object to having their DNA on file - for any purpose.
5. And as others have said - anyone can get a paternity test on their own.
I don't support mandatory testing. I don't get the salivating some guys are doing with reference to this issue, except for anyone who has been so duped in the past.
However, I think women have a difficult time understanding any anxiety a man may have about this, since women know for certain that the child is theirs, and guys have no such.
If through some medical necessity some testing was done and it established that one of my children was the biological product of another man, I wouldn't see my child any differently, or I'd hope I wouldn't. I'm not terribly fond of their mother as is, and so the news might lead to some updating of the reasons I'm not so fond.
I don't support mandatory testing. I don't get the salivating some guys are doing with reference to this issue, except for anyone who has been so duped in the past.
However, I think women have a difficult time understanding any anxiety a man may have about this, since women know for certain that the child is theirs, and guys have no such.
I understand if there is doubt about fidelity and a man is going to be paying years of child support for a child he has never bonded with and is likely not to. But in those situations he can refuse to put his name on the BC and have a test. Honestly, I don't think it is about the money in situations of long term relationship or marriage where the child was being raised as his own. I think its about a blow to his ego. And women, although they don't have the financial investment or responsibility, suffer the same blow when they find out their husband/lover has fathered a child with another woman. Women are not certain their husbands don't have other kids out there.
I understand if there is doubt about fidelity and a man is going to be paying years of child support for a child he has never bonded with and is likely not to. But in those situations he can refuse to put his name on the BC and have a test. Honestly, I don't think it is about the money in situations of long term relationship or marriage where the child was being raised as his own. I think its about a blow to his ego. And women, although they don't have the financial investment or responsibility, suffer the same blow when they find out their husband/lover has fathered a child with another woman. Women are not certain their husbands don't have other kids out there.
Exactly.
Unless a wife has a way to track what happens to every single sperm that has her husband's DNA, this is not an "equality" issue as some men would like to believe. End of the day, you're still accusing her of cheating in the event she gets knocked up, but how are you planning to prove your own faithfulness?
Meanwhile, if you have a child you've bonded with only to find out you're not the bio father, you're going to make that child -the innocent in the mess- pay the price by walking out as the only father figure the child knows.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dewdrop93
Agreed. And I'll add to that -
How would it work? There are lots of single moms - how would they have a mandatory paternity test? What if they don't even know who the father is? Would every single person in the world have to give a willing DNA swab so that it could be compared to any possible child that they might have? Would you only have it mandatory if there is a father listed on the birth certificate? If so - then it's not really mandatory, right? Maybe people would just stop listing a father to avoid any hassle.
Case in point - I know of a single mom that purposely left the bio father off the BC and does not get any child support from anyone for safety reasons. He was physically abusive and she left the relationship before the child was born. In order to protect her child from ever having to be in his care, household or control, she purposely left him off the BC. The child doesn't know any different, and the mother prefers to keep it that way. Requiring the bio father to be on the BC or involved in DNA also gives the bio father a chance at parenting rights, and some don't need to be a parent.
If you can't take care of a child(ren) by yourself then don't have them. There are no accidents. If she keeps the child she CHOSE to keep it. Her body. Her choice.
If you can't take care of a child(ren) by yourself then don't have them. There are no accidents. If she keeps the child she CHOSE to keep it. Her body. Her choice.
There is more to child rearing than just taking care of them. Children look for the common ground with both genders, not just mom. My son is almost a year and half, his father is not a staple in his life (his father's choice to not execute visitation) ... my son plays hang out with men in his life as much as he can - my uncles, cousins, brothers, brother in laws, etc, etc, etc. He just LOVES to hang out with a guy any chance he can get.
Also, children do feel EMOTIONS. If you're bonded with a child and then walk out, the child doesn't understand. It is a devastation to THEIR world because you're on an ego trip.
There is more to child rearing than just taking care of them. Children look for the common ground with both genders, not just mom. My son is almost a year and half, his father is not a staple in his life (his father's choice to not execute visitation) ... my son plays hang out with men in his life as much as he can - my uncles, cousins, brothers, brother in laws, etc, etc, etc. He just LOVES to hang out with a guy any chance he can get.
Also, children do feel EMOTIONS. If you're bonded with a child and then walk out, the child doesn't understand. It is a devastation to THEIR world because you're on an ego trip.
Yet the mother didn't feel any emotion when she cheated. If she didn't then why not get one? It'll shut him up and you can throw it in a face a few times.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.