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Old 01-07-2012, 08:08 AM
 
3 posts, read 4,674 times
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Do u think a long distance relationship can withstand the test of time? I met a guy a few yrs ago, he lives on the west coast & i live on the east coast. We talked several months b4 I decided to visit him. Well we met & we instantly clicked. I like him & he likes me. I really like him.. I visit a few times a year & things are always good while im there. I cant seem to figure out why he trips out me everytime i get back home. Other than that things are ok. We still talk but not everyday. The attitude change when i get back home bothers me a little.
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Old 01-07-2012, 08:21 AM
 
Location: Central Florida
973 posts, read 1,701,839 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by teenie30286 View Post
Do u think a long distance relationship can withstand the test of time? I met a guy a few yrs ago, he lives on the west coast & i live on the east coast. We talked several months b4 I decided to visit him. Well we met & we instantly clicked. I like him & he likes me. I really like him.. I visit a few times a year & things are always good while im there. I cant seem to figure out why he trips out me everytime i get back home. Other than that things are ok. We still talk but not everyday. The attitude change when i get back home bothers me a little.
What do you mean by what I bolded? And I am one of the few here who will say that a LDR can work, but to what end? I have been in one (but broke up for a year due to the distance) for three years now, and we don't communicate every day, nor do either of us panic over this, and he lives in another country and we both do have lives. BUT for it to truly work, I need to go back and address my question "to what end?", for if you don't have a goal to eventually be together in real life, to what purpose would the relationship be? Do you talk about ever being together as RL a couple??
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Old 01-07-2012, 09:56 AM
 
3 posts, read 4,674 times
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we have had that discussion but honestly im a lil scared because I have no family there. What i mean by his attitude changes is when i get back to my home state his mind starts to wander & he acts unsure if he can deal with the distance but he always comes backaround
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Old 01-07-2012, 09:56 AM
 
Location: NYC
53 posts, read 196,551 times
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I'm also a bit confused by what you mean when you say he "trips out on you" when you return home?


I'm currently in a long distance relationship (like you Sagitarrius it's international and we also don't speak every day and are ok with that) and so yes, I believe it can work. However, it sounds like you're the only one putting in effort to visit. Has he ever come to see you? If not, that may be a sign he's not as committed to making to work. If you two have been seeing each other for a few years now and haven't had the talk as to where it's going then perhaps it's time. Unfortunately LDR's are different than typical relationships in that it's harder to just have fun and it sounds like you're at the point where you need more definition than that.
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Old 01-07-2012, 10:03 AM
 
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thanks & ur definitely right snowlove
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Old 01-20-2012, 03:12 PM
 
Location: Austin
2,162 posts, read 3,358,090 times
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I believe most ldr's are a distraction. Relationships need ongoing, daily attention.
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Old 01-20-2012, 03:20 PM
 
Location: New Jersey
8,711 posts, read 11,707,829 times
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no they do not work unless one or both parties is willing to be delusional and/or foolish on a daily basis. people can't even be faithful & honest in the same town together, same house together -- let alone 1500 miles away. common sense, to me.
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Old 01-20-2012, 03:24 PM
 
Location: Viña del Mar, Chile
16,393 posts, read 30,850,308 times
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People can definitely do long distance relationships, and don't let people tell you otherwise. But you need a short term goal of one person or the other moving to the same place. If there are no plans for relocation then it is useless.
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Old 01-20-2012, 03:25 PM
 
Location: Fort Worth, TX
9,394 posts, read 15,659,671 times
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I think they can work if there's more skin in the game. Perhaps it's not the best example, but there are plenty of military families that seem to stay together and well despite mom or dad being deployed months at a time.
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Old 01-20-2012, 04:04 PM
 
Location: Brazil
234 posts, read 880,675 times
Reputation: 162
Wink Wish you luck

Quote:
Originally Posted by teenie30286 View Post
Do u think a long distance relationship can withstand the test of time? I met a guy a few yrs ago, he lives on the west coast & i live on the east coast. We talked several months b4 I decided to visit him. Well we met & we instantly clicked. I like him & he likes me. I really like him.. I visit a few times a year & things are always good while im there. I cant seem to figure out why he trips out me everytime i get back home. Other than that things are ok. We still talk but not everyday. The attitude change when i get back home bothers me a little.
Yes it can...it a kind of relationship that you have to work A LITTLE BIT HARDER for...and I mean YOU AND HIM...
You both have to agree to visit each other..
and talk and talk a lot what bother and don't bother each other...

and how to deal with the situation until you to CAN live together in the same place...etc..understand?
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