Love or Money (hypothetical situation) (movies, men, party, shopping)

[sierraAZ]

Originally Posted by Stumbler.

Whether you agree with some of the points made or claimed in the article or not, the topic itself is thought-provoking about what the role of money in relation to happiness and the social realm and what people are "looking for" in money.

I pretty much agree with the rest. Good thing most of us don't have this sort of money because poor "relationships" will become almost extinct...

[moonsavvy]

Originally Posted by Lamplight

I'd say if you may not be able to afford to buy food next week, or you're not sure you can pay the rent next month, that would be plenty cause for worry for most people. Never in my life has money, or the lack of it, NOT been at least a moderate concern, so being financially comfortable AND not having to work unless I chose to would be a dream come true for me. Whereas, for me at least, love would simply be a nice thing to happen, but no big deal if it didn't (since I can't reasonably expect it to anyway). Of course, that's just me.

I've never known worry to solve any problems.

Not having to work unless you want is a dream for everyone. You could at least start by working a job that you enjoy. I have never understood people who work at jobs they didn't like for any length of period. I do understand if it's temporary, but day after day? I can't imagine it.

[Lamplight]

Now I'm curious. Of the two categories, I wonder what the voters in each category might have in common with those who chose the same answer. For example, maybe those of us who chose money haven't experienced real love, or maybe we're loners, or maybe we've been screwed over more and as a result are more jaded toward love. For me, I've never experienced anything close to love, I'm VERY content being alone 99% of the time, and I'm well acquainted with how much it sucks to be poor. Being realistic, the chances of me finding true love or even really dating at all are slim to none, so missing out on that doesn't seem like a big deal to me. Option two would be like my current life, but without the worry of finding a job or having to watch my finances with OCD levels of scrutiny. However, for someone who's experienced that sort of love, maybe they can think of nothing they'd like more than to have that (or to have it again, if they lost it). I'm guessing our various life experiences play an enormous role in which option we choose.

[sierraAZ]

Originally Posted by Lamplight

or maybe we've been screwed over more

I can vote for that category. However, not even in my most innocent years would I choose a life in abject poverty in exchange for the illusion of "love." I'm just not happy being poor.

[Lamplight]

Originally Posted by moonsavvy

I've never known worry to solve any problems.

Not having to work unless you want is a dream for everyone. You could at least start by working a job that you enjoy. I have never understood people who work at jobs they didn't like for any length of period. I do understand if it's temporary, but day after day? I can't imagine it.

Worry doesn't solve problems, but it certainly comes naturally when you have a lot to worry about. As far as not working a job you don't like, that's much easier said than done. Most people I know have the jobs they do because they have to survive one way or the other. I worked in warehouses for years and it sucked, and right now I need a job and if all I can get is a job in a warehouse, then that's what I'll do. Why? Because I'd rather not be homeless and starving to death. So what kind of job would I actually enjoy? I've been trying to figure that out since I was old enough to work, and so far all of the options I've come up with wouldn't provide enough money to even buy groceries, let alone pay the rent. And ideally, I wouldn't work at all but spend all of my time pursuing hobbies or travelling.

Originally Posted by sierraAZ

I can vote for that category. However, not even in my most innocent years would I choose a life in abject poverty in exchange for the illusion of "love." I'm just not happy being poor.

When I was younger I would have chosen love in a heartbeat, even though I've never been screwed over particularly badly. But as I grow older and remain single for longer, I'm learning that love I can take or leave, but I must have money to live.

[Stumbler.]

I voted in part because of the stress that comes from having to worry about finances, and in part as could see myself living a life without "settling down" with partner in an idealistic scenario, if I had other types of non-spouse relationships such as friendships (I'm also content with being alone most of the time, but I doubt even all but the most introverted folks can do without total social contact).

I am in total agreement about the job/work stress thing though. I remember as a kid being bombarded with the idealist "don't settle for less than doing what you like" message and really wanted to believe it as much as I can (and still, if any options do open to me doing what I like for a living). Nonetheless, I have found most day-to-day work not too enjoyable (it's just the unfortunate truth that not everyone can get the ones they like, just like lots of things in life that depend on both circumstance and will). Even in high school, I got a bit sad every time I saw the janitor often going about his business with a solemn, sad expression, and looking like he didn't like his job. I know we need to work to survive and maintain our society to run, acquire resources etc. but it's quite a sobering thought how much of our (or many people's) lives are often spent unhappy because of going through what it takes to make a living.

I'm almost reminded of those hypothetical future scenarios posed from the 60s (I'm not that old -- that was still a couple of decades before I was around) of what our world would be like...lol, talking about how robots/technology would take over all the tedious jobs no one wants to do, for us, and we'd have a utopia of only doing tasks we like/enjoy, that never materialized.

[moonsavvy]

Originally Posted by Lamplight

So what kind of job would I actually enjoy? I've been trying to figure that out since I was old enough to work, and so far all of the options I've come up with wouldn't provide enough money to even buy groceries, let alone pay the rent. And ideally, I wouldn't work at all but spend all of my time pursuing hobbies or travelling.

I'm not telling you to quit your day job and throw effort after foolishness, but I am saying that you don't have to settle for a crappy job or one you hate until you "win the lottery". Many people make enough money doing what they love to do. You just have to give yourself permission to dream a little.

[princesasabia]

Wow thats hard, but I go with money. At least I could visit all the places I have been dying to travel to.

[Lamplight]

Originally Posted by moonsavvy

I'm not telling you to quit your day job and throw effort after foolishness, but I am saying that you don't have to settle for a crappy job or one you hate until you "win the lottery". Many people make enough money doing what they love to do. You just have to give yourself permission to dream a little.

I really don't believe it's as easy as that for most people. For one thing, I'd have to figure out what it is I'd like to do that would actually provide an income, and so for in 16 years I haven't been able to figure that out. The things I might enjoy doing for a living are things that hardly anyone can make an adequate living doing. In the mean time, I have to eat and pay rent so my only real option is to take the first job I can find that will pay the bills, whether it's a miserable job or not. It's not a matter of daring to dream or not, it's a matter of being realistic and not wanting to be homeless.

[moonsavvy]

Originally Posted by sierraAZ

I can vote for that category. However, not even in my most innocent years would I choose a life in abject poverty in exchange for the illusion of "love." I'm just not happy being poor.

Woah, no one said anything about "illusion" of love.