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This is what i dont understand. We have a member here that has clearly stated what sort of advice she is soliciting. She knows the EASY way out of her situation but is looking for options/ideas/suggestions to support what she is already doing to salvage her marriage...yet some refuse to respect her wishes.
And yet notice what she ultimately did was to follow advice that was outside the boundaries she originally set, which was eseentially "help me learn to cope with being a doormat."
Now that she's delivered the ultimatum she needed to deliver, let's hope she intends to follow up on it should it become necessary.
If he does, hes got a strange way of showing it. I give her credit for trying to salvage the marriage. I hope shes serious with her ultimatums and isn't an SAH mom with no career to fall back on.
I am a stay at home mom, with a qualifications to fall back on. We made the decision for me to stay at home when our daughter was born since I was nursing and it was easier than being a nurse and pumping 12 hour shifts...
This is what i dont understand. We have a member here that has clearly stated what sort of advice she is soliciting. She knows the EASY way out of her situation but is looking for options/ideas/suggestions to support what she is already doing to salvage her marriage...yet some refuse to respect her wishes. Not everyone is in a hurry to be miserably lonely like some of you. She wants to SAVE her marriage and is willing to do any and everything possible to get her husband back....isnt this the sort of script Hollywood draws out in the movies with the male & female roles reversed? Its either you contribute to her thread with a suggestion that can actually help her accomplish her goal or simply ignore the thread. It cant be that difficult a thing to do you know....geezz....
AT MH - again i applaud your stance...I really do. Its not an easy position to find yourself but as you already noted, baby steps. I hope everything turns out the way you want.
All the best
Thank you so much for supporting me, my family and my decisions. It means a lot to finally see that some of you can see where I am coming from and what I am trying to do.
Saw a post on Facebook that said, you will never find the right one until you let go of the wrong one. This could apply to not only people, but attitudes, thoughts, and lifestyles. I wish you the best and I am so sorry you are hurting right now. Dig deep within your self, the answer is there. Love does not always conquer all.
You are right Love does not conquer all but Prayer does. It is not up to me but to God. Sorry if this offends some of you but that is my stance, I will not leave or abandon my marriage until God moves me and speaks to me to do so. Right now, He hasn't done any of that, hence the reason I haven't left yet.
There is no answer to this. It's why drug dealers (and cheaters) use them and throw them away every 60 days for a new one.
If he has an outside the home workplace all of the tools, phone computer, etc can be kept away from the home. My guy even paid with cash his expenses.
The answer to that is I see all of the finaces. I control the bank account, paychecks and credit cards....He does have his computer with him but I have access to everything. And yes, he does work out side of the home but he comes home every night when he is supposed to and has GPS on his phone so I can see where he is all day long. He doesn't use cash for his expenses because he never has....I'm sorry your guy used cash for his but I can say this, mine doesn't.
Trained? How sad that one feels the need to refer to their husband as a dog that needs trained. If you didn't like how he is when you were dating perhaps marriage should not have been on the agenda.
I love how he was when we were dating, hence the marriage. I don't believe that he needs to be trained, I don't treat him like an animal and unless I want to be treated like one, I won't treat him like one.
Ask yourself one question: What are you teaching your children?
In my eyes and in the eyes of the one that really matters, I am teaching our children to never give up until God tells them too. If I ran at every little thing that should make me run, then I would do nothing but sit in my room all day long and do exactly that, NOTHING. But I am a person with feelings, I am a woman who needs to be loved and I am a Faithful wife who will stand by her husband until God's will is done. Plain and simple.
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