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If she dresses like she's ready to go dance to "rack city", I won't complain at all about it but I won't treat her with any type of respect.
I make it known from the onset that I like quality, I love dressing up in tailored/custom outfits from time to time but if she feel's fine with wearing sweat pants that say couture on back of them...well I feel fine dropping her at that moment.
Here's the kicker, if she keeps a feminine appearance I don't have to tell her how to dress. It's not that she's keeping the appearance because of me, she's doing it because she takes pride in herself and how she looks.
He waited several weeks before springing that on you, because he wanted you to get "into" him first. Once he believed he "had" you, then he'd tell you about all his "remodeling" he wanted done to yourself. Bastid.
Essentially, he waited until there was an emotional attachment, which is what enabled his controlling/"controlling" behavior to actually affect her in some way. But there's a considerable chance that he didn't even know he was the controlling type, and that he didn't strategically wait just to get her hooked before moving on to phase 2 in some ingenious plan to take over. If he'da made a certain supposed "social blunder" (telling her what he thinks right away, no restrictions), she would've known right away what she was getting into, before emotions could stand a chance of hindering an objective look and a swift kick out the door.
That's why I say you don't wait. You don't avoid expressing your feelings or strong preferences in lieu of ensuring the first dates lead to a relationship. You don't do it for fear of being labeled a jerk, either. Might just be abnormal, but it'd serve some invaluable practical purposes.
Essentially, he waited until there was an emotional attachment, which is what enabled his controlling/"controlling" behavior to actually affect her in some way. But there's a considerable chance that he didn't even know he was the controlling type, and that he didn't strategically wait just to get her hooked before moving on to phase 2 in some ingenious plan to take over. If he'da made a certain supposed "social blunder" (telling her what he thinks right away, no restrictions), she would've known right away what she was getting into, before emotions could stand a chance of hindering an objective look and a swift kick out the door.
That's why I say you don't wait. You don't avoid expressing your feelings or strong preferences in lieu of ensuring the first dates lead to a relationship. You don't do it for fear of being labeled a jerk, either. Might just be abnormal, but it'd serve some invaluable practical purposes.
Cool. I agree with the above.
At least everyone will know where they stand on things.
I explained why expressing your preferences is not criticism already.
Of course it happens. This thread was inspired by someone else telling of it happening to her. I'd imagine it doesn't happen very OFTEN, but I also gave my explanation as to why it doesn't.
Explaining and excusing are not the same thing, my friend. And I didn't say I didn't get offended by it to make a point; I said it to answer a question.
You clearly stated that you understand why doing it would hurt a woman's feelings. If you would choose to do so anyway, that just makes you a cruel person. That's the reality of your position. Period.
Essentially, he waited until there was an emotional attachment, which is what enabled his controlling/"controlling" behavior to actually affect her in some way. But there's a considerable chance that he didn't even know he was the controlling type, and that he didn't strategically wait just to get her hooked before moving on to phase 2 in some ingenious plan to take over. If he'da made a certain supposed "social blunder" (telling her what he thinks right away, no restrictions), she would've known right away what she was getting into, before emotions could stand a chance of hindering an objective look and a swift kick out the door.
That's why I say you don't wait. You don't avoid expressing your feelings or strong preferences in lieu of ensuring the first dates lead to a relationship. You don't do it for fear of being labeled a jerk, either. Might just be abnormal, but it'd serve some invaluable practical purposes.
Geez, stop stereotyping men! Not all men are so naive and simple they don't realize when they're being creeps!
Essentially, he waited until there was an emotional attachment, which is what enabled his controlling/"controlling" behavior to actually affect her in some way. But there's a considerable chance that he didn't even know he was the controlling type, and that he didn't strategically wait just to get her hooked before moving on to phase 2 in some ingenious plan to take over. If he'da made a certain supposed "social blunder" (telling her what he thinks right away, no restrictions), she would've known right away what she was getting into, before emotions could stand a chance of hindering an objective look and a swift kick out the door.
That's why I say you don't wait. You don't avoid expressing your feelings or strong preferences in lieu of ensuring the first dates lead to a relationship. You don't do it for fear of being labeled a jerk, either. Might just be abnormal, but it'd serve some invaluable practical purposes.
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