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Well, in some states sexual/affectional orientation is NOT a protected class, and people do get legally fired, unfortunately. Make sure it's protected in your state.
In Florida workplaces, there is no state or federal protection based on sexual orientation.
However, several Florida cities and counties such as Miami Beach, Dade County, and Broward County have ordinances offering some protections for gays and lesbians. In addition, members of the GLBT community may have rights under one of the other protected categories, such as gender, if they face discrimination at work. In the case of sexual harassment, same-sex predators are outlaws just as much as are straight sexual harassers.
My neighbor asked an ex-friend/co-worker if she was homosexual, (1) because of the gay crowd the ex-friend hung out with, and (2) all the rumors which were spreading at their job. The ex-friend was in the closet at the time and always said no, causing my neighbor to stick up for her and defend her of any gay accusations. This lying went on for about a year until it was evident the ex-friend was not being truthful. Now, my neighbor feels like a fool for defending her and says the ex-friend isn't trustworthy. SOME gays need to stop lying to themselves because sooner or later everyone will know. Besides, it's a double standard. You expect society to be more "excepting", but at the same time your running around "hiding" in a damn closet. Don't deceive anyone. Just be yourself.
Some of you have helped me in dealing with my mother and me coming out to her and her accepting my gf etc. Thank you to everyone for your input. We are actually doing really great!
My gf and I are starting the process to start our family and I hope to be pregnant in the next few months. No body at work knows that I'm gay. It's not that I hide it, I just don't talk about it and no one asks. Now obviously, there will be no hiding the pregnancy. I know it's really no body's business,but I'm not sure how to deal with this. I'm assuming people will start asking questions...
I'm not overly open and gay or straight I don't like to talk about my personal life at work. I'm just wondering what to expect. How nosey will people get? Or will anyone even care? I would prefer not to come out, but how much can I really hide.
People will probably do more gossiping behind your back while smiling in your face but I don't think they will 'care' enough to start giving you the third degree. They might ask casually though. Best not to talk too much about your personal life at work anyways. There are certain women in my office that could put those TV soaps to shame, with all the drama they volunteer about their personal buisness in the work environment. That's not my style personally. Tell only as much as your comfortable and say you want to keep the details of the situation private.
Continue keeping your business life separate from your personal life. If/when you become pregnant, you aren't any more obligated to share your personal life at work than you were before.
This....Your personal life is your personal life. If you were in the type place that you wouldn't feel judged you wouldn't be worried, but you are, so just live your life, you don't owe explanations to anyone. Not because you're ashamed, or should be, just because I have always believed you should keep business and personal separate. imo
I have a gay son who has a partner and maybe my view is a little distorted but..
Coming out is hard to do but it's not near the issue it was 20 years ago. All of us work, live, know people in the LGBT community. You're nervous which is understandable and there will always be a few who are ignorant.
There will be questions as you start to show. I'd just say "My partner and I are having a baby". If they ask about your husband just say "she" in whatever you say.
It's not a big deal anymore, don't make it one. People will get the message.
I have a gay son who has a partner and maybe my view is a little distorted but..
Coming out is hard to do but it's not near the issue it was 20 years ago. All of us work, live, know people in the LGBT community. You're nervous which is understandable and there will always be a few who are ignorant.
There will be questions as you start to show. I'd just say "My partner and I are having a baby". If they ask about your husband just say "she" in whatever you say.
It's not a big deal anymore, don't make it one. People will get the message.
Perfect answer. No one is going to say more when you respond as suggested above. People will talk behind your back, but they do that about everybody.
We had this new girl at work. When she introduced herself, she referenced her partner. I knew she had a partner, but didn't feel the need to discuss it. No problem. We accepted her as we would have any new employee. We eventually met her partner and liked her. They adopted a child and we met and liked him. People who like you will like you regardless of who you are. You have to be comfortable with yourself and your decisions.
I am not trying to generalize here, but usually when women are gay, it is so much easier for them to make it in the work place. I have worked in all kinds of fields (Manufacturing, retail, medical, Human resources) and when it comes to women being gay, it is always so much easier for people to accept them in the work place than it is the men. Men usually have a harder time being accepted.
As far as your pregnancy is concerned, you will be bombarded with tons and tons of questions though. I have read some people's comments about telling you to come out at work; I have had tons of friends that are afraid to come out because people around here is very closed minded, however remember that you are always going to have haters and they don't matter as they will not bring any positive into your life so you shouldn't be concerned about what their thoughts are... just ignore them, plain and simple. I understand you being afraid to come out and you don't have to. Realistically, it is not anyone's business who you love or what your preferences are, seriously; you don't own anyone anything and you should never feel like you do... again, the haters don't matter.
Continue keeping your business life separate from your personal life. If/when you become pregnant, you aren't any more obligated to share your personal life at work than you were before.
That's my thought too (though to be fair, for some lines of work, it is easier keeping personal info separate from work, and some are a bit harder -- such as those where you are more a public or semi-public figure).
If it ain't none of their business, why do they have to know. You can say it if you feel comfortable. You can not say it if you feel comfortable that way.
Yes, I know people can make up dumb rumours etc. but if a man or woman of integrity just smiles, keeps it cools and knows what battles to fight, they've (the gossipers) got no leg to stand on. Dumb or nasty rumours can make the gossiper look like a fool if the person gossiped about keeps a cool, disinterested attitude and goes about life without a care or no desire to get down into the ratholes with them.
In my experience in the workplace, employers seem to be more accepting of gay men than gay women. I don't know why this is.
As a fellow wage slave, I could not care less about my colleagues' sexual orientations. I don't care and it's none of my business. However there are still people out there who will treat you like crap because of your lifestyle "choice".
If you don't HAVE to come out, then I wouldn't make a huge production of telling people that you're gay. And I bet a lot of people, probably more than you would guess, have figured it out already. It's not like I'm telling you to keep it a secret; it's just not worth discussing IMHO. I haven't "come out" as straight to my coworkers, after all. It's nobody's business whether I like guys or girls (or both).
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