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Have you ever been in the middle of being "intimate" with your SO when all of a sudden, you hear an unannounced knock at the door? How did you handle the situation? Did you just wait until they left? Or did you stop, dress, and go answer the door?
The thread is inspired by a little situation I found myself in today. I never go anywhere unannounced but today I did because a couple I'm freinds with were out of town and I went to go check things out at the house to make sure everything was ok. When I got there I seen that they had returned but I was already in the driveway and figured I was obligated to say hello.
When I got to the door the tv and lights were on and the dogs were at the door barking at me. It had all the signs that someone was home except I knocked and nobody answered. I stood for awhile and knocked again but still no answer. I then stepped down into the driveway and sent a text to one of them from whom I didn't get a reply.
I thought ok then, thats cool, I'm outa here. So I backed out of the drive and began driving down the road when she stepped out of the front door and called my name. I stopped and said "where were ya"? She said she was in the bathroom and proceeded to my car to talk for a moment. Then her husband came out and spoke as well. If she was in the bathroom then where was he? Hmmmm.....
So do you guys think I'm right? Have you ever been in either my situation or theirs and how did you handle it?
Since being so pushy came natural to you, I think you should expect to deliver the same response to your friends. A knock, with no answer....leave.
No, I wouldn't stop anything. I also hate people who just drop by without calling first. I used to have a stupid neighbor down the road that did that all the time. I'm dropping a bomb on toilet town or in the shower or sleeping and the bell rings. Just what I always wanted. Call first!!
Wow to all who don't want unannounced visitors. So many times growing up, we were in the neighborhood and stopped in to visit. My mother was one of 10 children and 9 were local - within 1/2 hour. If it was later found out you were nearby and didn't stop in, there'd be heck to pay! Now, if I'm in the middle of something, I'm not going to get the door, but I will absolutely definitely welcome the knock on my door. I may not invite a stranger inside, but damn, I'll at at least find out who it is.
If you don't answer, that's fine - but expecting a phone call first? Yanno, there are many of us who can't use telephones - and with us boomers reaching that age, there's going to be a huge number of HoH unable to use phones - so get used to it.
I think it's a cultural thing the more I read the responses. When I was a kid and I would stay with my grandparents on the weekends and in the summer, they would get unannounced visitors all the time. Nobody ever called first, they would just drop by. My grandfather was the same way with all his freinds. He never called or anything, he just went over to their house.
So, I think it has something to do with old and young, then and now. In simpler times common courtesies were different. Back then they didn't have things like texting, FB, or twitter. Heck they were lucky to have a phone at all I guess. The world is getting fast paced, busy, and very impersonal if you ask me. Everyone is getting more and more disconnected on a personal level because we don't really need that personal contact to stay connected with each other like they did way back when. Now we can just shoot them a text or send them a tweet. If we want to know whats going on in someones life all we have to do is ckeck out our news feed on Facebook, we dont need to actually go visit them anymore.
What kind of a world do we live in where personal contact with someone is now frowned upon, a chore that has to be scheduled and filed away into someones daily planner? Sometimes I think the simpler times may well have been the better of times..... Just my 2 cents worth.
Last edited by WhipperSnapper 88; 03-26-2012 at 06:49 PM..
Wow...just read thru this thread. Forget about an intimite moment, no one answers the door anymore.
I've got a secured front entry with a buzzer. I can lift the phone and screen without opening a door. Anyone who wants to stop by will ring my cell phone first and I give the same courtesy.
Wow to all who don't want unannounced visitors. So many times growing up, we were in the neighborhood and stopped in to visit. My mother was one of 10 children and 9 were local - within 1/2 hour. If it was later found out you were nearby and didn't stop in, there'd be heck to pay! Now, if I'm in the middle of something, I'm not going to get the door, but I will absolutely definitely welcome the knock on my door. I may not invite a stranger inside, but damn, I'll at at least find out who it is.
If you don't answer, that's fine - but expecting a phone call first? Yanno, there are many of us who can't use telephones - and with us boomers reaching that age, there's going to be a huge number of HoH unable to use phones - so get used to it.
It really isn't a case of not wanting unannounced visitors. But if you are dropping by unannounced, it would be rather presumptuous of you to expect the visitee to drop everything to come to the door, especially in this day of unwelcome solicitors, scams, and the fact that it's so simple to call ahead. It IS a different time than when we were kids.
We have "walk in friends" and adults kids so the last thing we do when "busy" outside of the regular expected timeframe is deadbolt the door and it stays deadbolted if they come a-knocking. They can think what they want but at least they can't just walk in and catch the action
For the record I also think it's rude to show up unannounced. It's something I never do and wasnt planning on doing to my freinds, but like I said they weren't supposed to be home anyway.
I think it's a cultural thing the more I read the responses. When I was a kid and I would stay with my grandparents on the weekends and in the summer, they would get unannounced visitors all the time. Nobody ever called first, they would just drop by. My grandfather was the same way with all his freinds. He never called or anything, he just went over to their house.
So, I think it has something to do with old and young, then and now. In simpler times common courtesies were different. Back then they didn't have things like texting, FB, or twitter. Heck they were lucky to have a phone at all I guess. The world is getting fast paced, busy, and very impersonal if you ask me. Everyone is getting more and more disconnected on a personal level because we don't really need that personal contact to stay connected with each other like they did way back when. Now we can just shoot them a text or send them a tweet. If we want to know whats going on in someones life all we have to do is ckeck out our news feed on Facebook, we dont need to actually go visit them anymore.
What kind of a world do we live in where personal contact with someone is now frowned upon, a chore that has to be scheduled and filed away into someones daily planner? Sometimes I think the simpler times may well have been the better of times..... Just my 2 cents worth.
Oh bull. You are misinterpreting, and making all sorts of absurd analogies that have no basis. No one said that personal contact is frowned upon. However, it's not considered to be a courtesy to show up knocking at the door, unannounced, and then be perturbed because no one answered the door. THAT is definitely poor manners in anyone's book, then, and now.
Maybe it is just cultural or the way you are brought up. I was brought to think it was terribly rude and to always announce my visit to anyone, even friends.
My Grand-Parents would have been horrified to have visitors without being able to receive them "properly" for example by having cakes or nibbles ready.
My Grand-Mother always looked her best but made an extra special effort for guests and would have hated being put on the spot without having had a chance to change for example. She would have been mortified had she not been at her best.
I would hate to impose myself on someone when they might be tired, having other plans, work to do, wanting a bit of downtime to themselves or just wanting to be "hermits" for one evening for whatever reasons.
I would be worried by simply turning up that I am in effect forcing myself upon them and not giving them a chance to find an excuse . I like to be wanted as a guest not an imposition.
It is a form of emotional blackmail to expect people to receive you at the last minute,in essence you are saying you don't care if they have something more important to do and have no right to their privacy.
^^^ THIS!!! It's a matter of good manners. Sadly, good manners have passed away together with common sense. Long time ago.
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Don't answer...
No one said that personal contact is frowned upon. 
However, it's not considered to be a courtesy to show up knocking at the door, unannounced, and then be perturbed because no one answered the door. THAT is definitely poor manners in anyone's book, then, and now. 
