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Old 03-28-2012, 01:20 PM
 
Location: On the corner of Grey Street
5,769 posts, read 5,561,326 times
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I don't see what his being American has to do with anything!

I think the world of online dating changes things a bit. If I met someone out in public or through a friend and we had 5 dates I may be more likely to assume they weren't dating anyone else (which may or may not be a correct assumption). With online dating it's different. It's so much easier to meet a wide variety of people. I'd just see how things went. If things go well and you feel really connected and comfortable, then you can ask. Do what you feels right. No one understands the dynamic of a realtionship except for the two people actually in the relationship.

 
Old 03-28-2012, 01:22 PM
 
103 posts, read 176,811 times
Reputation: 64
Quote:
Originally Posted by marilyn220 View Post
I'd be more comfortable "asking", because I like to know where I stand on things.

Not just in relationships, but all areas of my life.
Exactly. Thank you. What makes my situation particularly tricky is the online dating aspect. I don't want to have sex with someone that's still snooping for other guys and potentially in bed with other guys.

I'm going to bring this up to her both as a responsibility to my health and monogamous lifestyle, and because I especially like her. If she at all feels the same, this should not be a problem at all.
 
Old 03-28-2012, 01:24 PM
 
Location: Austin
2,173 posts, read 2,072,628 times
Reputation: 2125
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChessieMom View Post
THIS^^^. Absolutely agree. If I "went there" without having "the talk" first, I wouldn't be even considering anything exclusive, at least not with him!

I wish more people thought this way, but sex seems to be so important so early on.

Must be an age thing. I have been in a stable relationship for almost 3 months now, and sex was never an automatic expectation.
 
Old 03-28-2012, 01:34 PM
 
Location: Austin
2,173 posts, read 2,072,628 times
Reputation: 2125
Quote:
Originally Posted by 30 Sec Flat View Post
Stupid Americans. Everything is so codified and sterile with them.
what??? Nice way to start out on here.
 
Old 03-28-2012, 01:35 PM
 
Location: New Jersey
8,738 posts, read 7,095,520 times
Reputation: 7395
Quote:
Originally Posted by Johnny Ace View Post
I've been on four dates with a woman, the most recent being at my place where I cooked her dinner and we made out. She stayed far longer than planned, nestled in my arms, and it was wonderful. She's now having me come to her place tomorrow (my suggestion, actually) and I could see sex being somewhat likely. I met her online and I honestly don't care to be using the dating site now that I met her, but she still appears to be on it sometimes (she once acknowledged this as simply being out of boredom, as she lives alone).

If things go well and we do have sex, I want to feel secure that we'll be in an exclusive relationship. Based on her chemistry answers and personality, I can't see her sleeping around with multiple guys, but I also can't help but be a little concerned about the issue, mainly out of my own insecurity. We click really well and I think she's pretty special. Is it too much to ask her about exclusivity at this stage, if things go really well tomorrow?

4 or 5 dates? geez moving so fast.....
 
Old 03-28-2012, 01:37 PM
 
Location: Austin
2,173 posts, read 2,072,628 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MissLucky View Post
John, the guy I'm dating asked to be exclusive on our 2nd date two weeks ago and we haven't even had sex yet. If your is girl as interested as you think she is, she will be quite happy you asked. No one likes sharing the person they are interested in.

Good for him, and good for you both for waiting on the deed and not acting like rutting animals in heat.
 
Old 03-28-2012, 01:41 PM
 
10,644 posts, read 10,215,341 times
Reputation: 11288
Johnny Ace...I dodn't see anything wrong with telling your new gal that you're looking for an exclusive relationship...chances are so is she, and she'd be flattered....I don't think it's too soon at all...you know what you want...lets hope she feels the same.
 
Old 03-28-2012, 01:51 PM
 
4,495 posts, read 5,564,343 times
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Do what feels right. You know what to do better in your situation than any of us since we're not in it.
 
Old 03-28-2012, 01:58 PM
 
103 posts, read 176,811 times
Reputation: 64
Thank you, purehuman and mir86. I'm just somewhat young and inexperienced not only in dating but specifically online dating, so it's hard to know how to act in some situations. Everything with this girl has had such a natural flow and been going really great. Talking to her without sounding too overbearing seems like the right choice.
 
Old 03-28-2012, 02:02 PM
 
4,495 posts, read 5,564,343 times
Reputation: 2688
Quote:
Originally Posted by Johnny Ace View Post
Thank you, purehuman and mir86. I'm just somewhat young and inexperienced not only in dating but specifically online dating, so it's hard to know how to act in some situations. Everything with this girl has had such a natural flow and been going really great. Talking to her without sounding too overbearing seems like the right choice.
How old are you? You'll quickly learn that what other people tell you is just mere speculation. Only you know what is right. Just follow your gut. Theres a reason we feel weird when we go against our gut/instict.
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