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I don't think it's an issue if they're enthusiastic, which also means willingness to please. It's what I put bold around that's a concern, especially when it's for something that's NOT kinky. And I've got a helluva story.
I don't think it's an issue if they're enthusiastic, which also means willingness to please. It's what I put bold around that's a concern, especially when it's for something that's NOT kinky. And I've got a helluva story.
I gave him plenty of blow jobs. And he gave me several orgasm. We are the same age.
Okay, now I see. And you know what? You probably don't have anything to worry about at all.
Just that once you have intercourse, if you don't have an orgasm that way, make sure he knows that he still needs to satisfy you somehow. It goes back to what I said about too many men out there thinking that sex begins and ends with their penis in a vagina. It doesn't. Only an oaf would make that assumption. After he has his orgasm, if you're not satisfied, he can still please you with at least his hands.
Better yet if you can hold him to the first bit of manners that all gentlemen learn long before they become sexually active: Ladies first!
Seriously, though. It is extremely rare for a man not to have an orgasm during intercourse, and if they can't, the issue is usually some kind of health problem or medication they're taking. Not that you should just lay there. Just that if you are present and enthusiastic in the moment, it's pretty much a gimme that he'll climax. Women, not so much. Most women need more than penetration--and don't let anyone here tell you any different. The research is there from Alfred Kinsey, Masters & Johnson, Shere Hite, and so on. I don't want to get too graphic here because this is a PG forum, but long story short, it's just anatomy and has to do with where the clitoris is located.
[URL="http://abcnews.go.com/Health/ReproductiveHealth/sex-study-female-orgasm-eludes-majority-women/story?id=8485289#.T3dgFNVJS8A"]Orgasm from Intercourse Eludes Majority of Women[/URL]
So don't beat yourself up if you don't climax from intercourse alone. That doesn't mean you're lousy in bed. It doesn't mean he's lousy in bed, either--unless, again, he doesn't care enough to take the time to satisfy you, too, in other ways.
And whatever you do, don't fake it.
[URL="http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/stress-and-sex/201012/orgasms-you-cant-fake-it-till-you-make-it"]Orgasms: You Can't Fake it Till You Make It | Psychology Today[/URL]
Your satisfaction is your responsibility. Show or tell him what he needs to do. Again, I don't want to get too graphic, but there are plenty of positions that will enable him to reach you with his hands while you're doing the deed. Do some research and you will [URL="http://www.sexinfo101.com/"]find them[/URL]. (Link NSFW, even though the demonstrations are animated.)
Him having experience but waiting 2 years for sex is kind of off to me.
Frankly, if I have my GF in my bed and both of us are naked, we aren't sleeping. If she isn't willing to fool around, the clothes stay on, except for my shirt since I sleep shirtless.
As for the question: have you not read up on any positions or techniques? Yeah you're inexperienced, but at least you can look up some positions so you at least have an idea of what to do. Hell, you don't even know if you're bad in bed, you've never had sex!
This should not be on her at this stage of the game. She is a virgin and she needs to know about positions? He is supposedly "very experienced"(I am guessing he is not really) she had several orgasms in a couple years. He is the one who should be worried! There something going on with him.
With every relationship, that's what sex eventually devolved to because I was sick of them always getting off and me not even getting warm. I've had the worst luck with men, seriously...they have all been useless in bed, so sex for me was something to endure. Eventually I got sick of it and cut my last boyfriend off, and he never got the hint. He should have realized that he'd also never given me an orgasm. Unlike other women, I don't fake orgasms. I gave him plenty of feedback and instruction, he just ignored it. Ugh, I get annoyed STILL just thinking about his incompetent fumblings.
" I gave him plenty of feedback and instruction," Wow, if you really give good feedback your probably just getting with men who are not intuitive, are into themselves, inexperienced, young or any combination of the above. In my opinion, if a man knows what he is doing you will be 90% of the way there prior to parts meeting. I can understand where you are coming from considering I have only been with 2 women who have been exceptional, with most being good or ok, and more than a couple of duds.
Back to the OP. From the responses you see there is advice all over the place, which shows you no two couples are alike. If you are inquisitive and adventurous and in tune with what you want it goes a long way in being sexually happy (my opinion only). The bigger factor is if you both share the same view and for the longer term if you both share the same view point 10 years down the road.
well don't have time to read all these post but want to throw in my 2 cents....if the guy thinks the girl sucks then its his job to teach her to be a better lover
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