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View Poll Results: Do you have bad luck in relationships?
Yes 26 55.32%
No 21 44.68%
Voters: 47. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 04-04-2012, 02:36 PM
 
8 posts, read 7,860 times
Reputation: 14

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I'm seriously thinking about giving up.I should probably forget about having a relationship.
The longest I was able to keep a guy was 2 months...I spent a fortune on clothes and makeup, spend hours in front of the mirror every day, exercise regularly, I have a stable job, I love animals, so yeah maybe I'm not the most perfect or pretty girl around but I'm trying really really hard.And yet all I ever find are either jerks who only want me for one night (don't get me wrong I'm not a ****...) or I get picked up by guys who have "potential serial killer" written all over their faces...
And then I look around and I see sooo many people who are not doing a damn thing and they have the sweetest most loving boyfriends ever.
For example, the most "serious" relationship I've ever had was 2 months with a guy I met at a bar...the furthest I got was staying over at his place and eating with his family.He didn't even call me his "girlfriend" in public...I was always just "the girl he met".
Then take my roommate.She met her boyfriend 3 months ago.They went on vacations together, spent every possible moment with each other, and now (after only 3 months!!!) he's moving in with us...(well, with HER...but since we're sharing a place...)
I can't help but being jealous...she got an amazing guy doing practically NOTHING, and I'm trying sooooo hard and every guy I've ever had was a complete jerk...

Maybe I should just give up.
Anybody else had a similar experience?
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Old 04-04-2012, 02:46 PM
 
Location: in Mary Ann and Ginger's hut
639 posts, read 368,145 times
Reputation: 561
where you meeting these losers? change of venue time
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Old 04-04-2012, 02:50 PM
 
Location: Infernuan
1,367 posts, read 846,381 times
Reputation: 1424
Quote:
Originally Posted by higome View Post
I'm seriously thinking about giving up.I should probably forget about having a relationship.
The longest I was able to keep a guy was 2 months...I spent a fortune on clothes and makeup, spend hours in front of the mirror every day, exercise regularly, I have a stable job, I love animals, so yeah maybe I'm not the most perfect or pretty girl around but I'm trying really really hard.And yet all I ever find are either jerks who only want me for one night (don't get me wrong I'm not a ****...) or I get picked up by guys who have "potential serial killer" written all over their faces...
And then I look around and I see sooo many people who are not doing a damn thing and they have the sweetest most loving boyfriends ever.
For example, the most "serious" relationship I've ever had was 2 months with a guy I met at a bar...the furthest I got was staying over at his place and eating with his family.He didn't even call me his "girlfriend" in public...I was always just "the girl he met".
Then take my roommate.She met her boyfriend 3 months ago.They went on vacations together, spent every possible moment with each other, and now (after only 3 months!!!) he's moving in with us...(well, with HER...but since we're sharing a place...)
I can't help but being jealous...she got an amazing guy doing practically NOTHING, and I'm trying sooooo hard and every guy I've ever had was a complete jerk...

Maybe I should just give up.
Anybody else had a similar experience?
Perhaps you are trying too hard. Perhaps 'decent' men can sense desperation on your part and want nothing to do with it so you are getting the jokers and losers instead. Just a thought of course...
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Old 04-04-2012, 02:51 PM
 
Location: Austin
2,173 posts, read 1,461,188 times
Reputation: 2082
Sounds like you are trying too hard, and that will absolutely register to a guy. He will see it as desperation. A relaxed, laid back girl is way more attractive than one who feels she needs to be putting in constant "effort."
Also...don't give any guy full access to you unless you are in a relationship, so yes, that means no sex.
They need to see you are worth it.

I don't suggest meeting in bars, either. Seriously...good men who want relationships are not going to be there, certainly not ones who go home with you or allow that right away.
Relationship material stuff, ya know.
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Old 04-04-2012, 02:52 PM
 
1,070 posts, read 853,045 times
Reputation: 435
Quote:
Originally Posted by higome View Post
I'm seriously thinking about giving up.I should probably forget about having a relationship.
The longest I was able to keep a guy was 2 months...I spent a fortune on clothes and makeup, spend hours in front of the mirror every day, exercise regularly, I have a stable job, I love animals, so yeah maybe I'm not the most perfect or pretty girl around but I'm trying really really hard.And yet all I ever find are either jerks who only want me for one night (don't get me wrong I'm not a ****...) or I get picked up by guys who have "potential serial killer" written all over their faces...
And then I look around and I see sooo many people who are not doing a damn thing and they have the sweetest most loving boyfriends ever.
For example, the most "serious" relationship I've ever had was 2 months with a guy I met at a bar...the furthest I got was staying over at his place and eating with his family.He didn't even call me his "girlfriend" in public...I was always just "the girl he met".
Then take my roommate.She met her boyfriend 3 months ago.They went on vacations together, spent every possible moment with each other, and now (after only 3 months!!!) he's moving in with us...(well, with HER...but since we're sharing a place...)
I can't help but being jealous...she got an amazing guy doing practically NOTHING, and I'm trying sooooo hard and every guy I've ever had was a complete jerk...

Maybe I should just give up.
Anybody else had a similar experience?
My best advice is to try to understand men a little better. Put yourself into their shoes and try to think like them for a moment. The average man is not going to be much like yourself at all. You should accept him as is. Don't try to mold him into what you would like or want. Women often go wrong when they start asking for and demanding a man that rarely exists. Sure some will be better at asking all their opinions on "what" he should do to attract a mate. The guy you want doesn't give a damn. You picked him as is and his TRUE self. That man is going to be keeper. He'll be the same way forever. The guy putting on the front will give up or cave sooner or later. "Who's this man I'm with?" "Who are you?" The guy who didn't give a damn is still the same and never changes! Words to live by!
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Old 04-04-2012, 02:53 PM
 
Location: Texas
391 posts, read 320,178 times
Reputation: 485
Stop trying so hard and spend more time doing things you enjoy and
perhaps when you least expect it something might happen.

I noted some emphasis on hours in front of the mirror and considerable
spending on makeup. I'm sure I'm not alone with an appreciate for light
makeup and a more natural look.
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Old 04-04-2012, 02:56 PM
 
Location: USA
6,706 posts, read 4,068,260 times
Reputation: 2325
smh that sounds pathetic, but
lots of beautiful women have
trouble with that subject for
some reason. maybe your
roommate's bf reminds her
of someone in her family.
just a thought.
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Old 04-04-2012, 02:57 PM
 
Location: Austin
2,173 posts, read 1,461,188 times
Reputation: 2082
Quote:
Originally Posted by JosephV55 View Post
Stop trying so hard and spend more time doing things you enjoy and
perhaps when you least expect it something might happen.

I noted some emphasis on hours in front of the mirror and considerable
spending on makeup. I'm sure I'm not alone with an appreciate for light
makeup and a more natural look.
I agree with this. Too high-maintenance. Men are not all that concerned.
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Old 04-04-2012, 02:58 PM
 
Location: in Mary Ann and Ginger's hut
639 posts, read 368,145 times
Reputation: 561
Quote:
Originally Posted by higome View Post
I'm seriously thinking about giving up.I should probably forget about having a relationship.
The longest I was able to keep a guy was 2 months...I spent a fortune on clothes and makeup, spend hours in front of the mirror every day, exercise regularly, I have a stable job, I love animals, so yeah maybe I'm not the most perfect or pretty girl around but I'm trying really really hard.And yet all I ever find are either jerks who only want me for one night (don't get me wrong I'm not a ****...) or I get picked up by guys who have "potential serial killer" written all over their faces...
And then I look around and I see sooo many people who are not doing a damn thing and they have the sweetest most loving boyfriends ever.
For example, the most "serious" relationship I've ever had was 2 months with a guy I met at a bar...the furthest I got was staying over at his place and eating with his family.He didn't even call me his "girlfriend" in public...I was always just "the girl he met".
Then take my roommate.She met her boyfriend 3 months ago.They went on vacations together, spent every possible moment with each other, and now (after only 3 months!!!) he's moving in with us...(well, with HER...but since we're sharing a place...)
I can't help but being jealous...she got an amazing guy doing practically NOTHING, and I'm trying sooooo hard and every guy I've ever had was a complete jerk...

Maybe I should just give up.
Anybody else had a similar experience?
is there some night/weekend class you can take, or join a political crusade, etc? you need to change it up where you meeting guys! and don't try too hard, actually if you cake on too much makeup it turns dudes off. Those other girls didn't even try that much that you mentioned. They probably lucked out, were in the right place right time
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Old 04-04-2012, 02:59 PM
 
Location: I am no Longer Invisible!!!!!
6,395 posts, read 5,945,647 times
Reputation: 15940
OP - You said it yourself - You're trying too hard...

Being desperate isn't good - you'll land up with a bunch of losers - who careless about you...
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