Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
well, you're not a woman, so if you don't try, then it won't happen.
I doubt that to be true, I know people personally who contradict your statement. However, if I go the rest of my life without ever finding someone then I'm okay with that because I'm focusing on other ways to live a fulfilling life.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,687 posts, read 41,585,069 times
Reputation: 41312
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissLucky
This thread makes me kind of sad. Giving up on dating at 29? Jesus.
First- It seems like OP is just frustrated and wants to be one with it.....for now anyway. I think he will down the line get up enough in himself to wanna date again.
Second- What are you sad about? Not like it is your life. If someone does not want to be bothered with a relationship, it is their business.
Things are still going great for me. I've remained determined to avoid dating at all costs and so far I've stuck to that principle. Keep in mind, I'm not against having a girlfriend ever again, I just won't go on dates to find her. Given I don't know how else I'll end up with a girl without somewhat dating her first, but so far I really could care less and that happiness level has remained high.
I'm almost done with training at my new job. A lot of nice young cute girls that have shown interest in me but I'm staying strong. I'm being friendly and totally cool with making new friends but dating will be out of the question if it ever comes to it. I'm also starting a new baseball season in a new baseball league. This manager has two teams (triple A and double A) with triple A being the more competitive league and I beat out 20 other guys for one of the 3 open positions on triple A. I'm pretty pumped about that since being 29 with a sore shoulder and already had double knee surgery a couple years ago....good to know I can still play well. I'm also working on scheduling a camping trip with some friends. I haven't been since I was a kid so this should be pretty fun. I have a friend who works at a camping store and can rent any equipment we need for a dirt cheap rate.
So for those out there struggling with dating, it's not worth it, so much more to life than letting people who don't care about you bring you down. Best of luck everyone!
It's great that your taking time to "enjoy" life without the need to be in a relationships. I am in a relationship. But there are times when I am tired and want to be alone. But don't do it all just out of spite'. Do it for the right reasons. Because I've underlined some points you've made that I'd like to address.
For some crazy reason in life it seems like we're the most wanted when we are not looking or already with someone. I don't know why, but it just seems like in life that people seem to come out of the woodworks when you are not truly looking. I have been with the same women for more than a few years and I get asked out alot. I'm not married, so there is no ring. So these women don't know that I am with someone. I always believe that when you are happy/ content with yourself-it shows. A lot of people get frustrated because they look too hard. They have that "head-jerk" reaction every time a good looking person walks by. They also unknowingly give out a look of desperation, which I believe many people pick up on.
However, having said that. I still think you should keep your options open. You said that there were alot of cute girls looking at you. Perhaps one of those "cute" girls might be the one that you potentially settle down with and make a life with. I'm just saying, don't be too stubborn to the point where you might blow off "the right one". I say this because there have been times in my life where I was like, "fk women". And I did exactly what you are doing! The only thing is, I had the same thing going on as you. There were many "potentially" great girls that were showing interest, yet I blew them off. I let my frustrations and disdain get the better of me. When the time seemed right and I began looking again, they were knowwhere to be found. They were gone. I really kicked myself in the arse for blowing some of them women off. Some things you can't take back. But sometimes, (and this could be your case/ then again it could not be) the time is just not right. But don't do it all strictly out of spite. That can come back to bite you in the arse..
Once again. There is nothing wrong with being alone. I honestly think that those people who jump from one relationship to another are not doing theirselves justice. They never take the time to heal from their last relationship; hence, they bring old baggage into their next one. That can't be good. Just keep an open mind. Maybe this should be an eye opener for those who are constantly looking. People can "smell" desperation. Just as people can "smell" contention. Right now you are content and "all those cute girls can see it". And they want a little bit of what you have..Since you don't want to be single forever (your words not mine) perhaps now is the time to strike. When you have more balance in your life. However, I am not so sure your "over" the bitterness yet. But your giving off that certain "vibe" that women do pick up on.
Good luck either way.
Last edited by supermanpansy; 04-18-2012 at 12:26 PM..
No, you change to make yourself a better person, you do it to please YOU. Then I guarantee people will be attracted to you as a pleasant side effect.
I really wish people would quit spouting this clicheed garbage. There are NO guarantees when it comes to attraction, in fact in my experience this is simply untrue. All the so-called 'improvements' didn't do a damn thing except make me a better person. That's all. It certainly did not help in the dating arena one bit.
I really wish people would quit spouting this clicheed garbage. There are NO guarantees when it comes to attraction, in fact in my experience this is simply untrue. All the so-called 'improvements' didn't do a damn thing except make me a better person. That's all. It certainly did not help in the dating arena one bit.
You're right, no guarantees, but it certainly improves people's chances, on average. And even if it doesn't, no harm.
Second- What are you sad about? Not like it is your life. If someone does not want to be bothered with a relationship, it is their business.
I'm sad he's giving up on relationships at such a tender age of 29 years. You must have missed that from previous two liner post. Sorry for being normal and having feelings, I guess I should be more like you.
First- It seems like OP is just frustrated and wants to be one with it.....for now anyway. I think he will down the line get up enough in himself to wanna date again.
Second- What are you sad about? Not like it is your life. If someone does not want to be bothered with a relationship, it is their business.
I'm not really that frustrated. I'm okay with everything that has happened. It all happened for a reason and it's lead me to this point. I can't complain or be frustrated with that one bit.
I'm just.....content.
Quote:
Originally Posted by supermanpansy
It's great that your taking time to "enjoy" life without the need to be in a relationships. I am in a relationship. But there are times when I am tired and want to be alone. But don't do it all just out of spite'. Do it for the right reasons. Because I've underlined some points you've made that I'd like to address.
For some crazy reason in life it seems like we're the most wanted when we are not looking or already with someone. I don't know why, but it just seems like in life that people seem to come out of the woodworks when you are not truly looking. I have been with the same women for more than a few years and I get asked out alot. I'm not married, so there is no ring. So these women don't know that I am with someone. I always believe that when you are happy/ content with yourself-it shows. A lot of people get frustrated because they look too hard. They have that "head-jerk" reaction every time a good looking person walks by. They also unknowingly give out a look of desperation, which I believe many people pick up on.
However, having said that. I still think you should keep your options open. You said that there were alot of cute girls looking at you. Perhaps one of those "cute" girls might be the one that you potentially settle down with and make a life with. I'm just saying, don't be too stubborn to the point where you might blow off "the right one". I say this because there have been times in my life where I was like, "fk women". And I did exactly what you are doing! The only thing is, I had the same thing going on as you. There were many "potentially" great girls that were showing interest, yet I blew them off. I let my frustrations and disdain get the better of me. When the time seemed right and I began looking again, they were knowwhere to be found. They were gone. I really kicked myself in the arse for blowing some of them women off. Some things you can't take back. But sometimes, (and this could be your case/ then again it could not be) the time is just not right. But don't do it all strictly out of spite. That can come back to bite you in the arse..
Once again. There is nothing wrong with being alone. I honestly think that those people who jump from one relationship to another are not doing theirselves justice. They never take the time to heal from their last relationship; hence, they bring old baggage into their next one. That can't be good. Just keep an open mind. Maybe this should be an eye opener for those who are constantly looking. People can "smell" desperation. Just as people can "smell" contention. Right now you are content and "all those cute girls can see it". And they want a little bit of what you have..Since you don't want to be single forever (your words not mine) perhaps now is the time to strike. When you have more balance in your life. However, I am not so sure your "over" the bitterness yet. But your giving off that certain "vibe" that women do pick up on.
Good luck either way.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I agree with you on many things. One thing I'll clear up is that I won't necessarily "turn down" a girl that pursues me (doubt that women do that these days anyway), but when I say I'll remain strong and resist tempation, I'm referring to asking them out or making a move that puts me out there first. I just can't justify that decision anymore, and I feel like pursuing a relationship would put my happiness at jeopardy. I have too many really good things going for me and the last thing I'd want is to be depressed over some girl all over again. I'm find with the way things are now. May not be the case in 3, 5, 10 years, but I just feel disgusted with the whole dating process and it doesn't feel like a "phase". I don't see any benefit in going back to that lifestyle.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.