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Old 04-18-2012, 10:53 AM
 
Location: SF Bay Area
11,667 posts, read 5,949,948 times
Reputation: 8645
Quote:
Originally Posted by darrensmooth View Post
I believe his post above explains it (sort of) his girl was texting a friend that had a a miscarriage, I think he thought it was something else, so if that is correct, then the girl has every right to be annoyed. Sounds like our OP is quite insecure, I was expecting to hear some sort of evidence that something was up, but I don't think there was.
It seems to me that they're both overreacting.

OP, I would just let her know that you're here and then give her a little time and space to cool off. She will come around.

 
Old 04-18-2012, 10:59 AM
 
Location: Long Island, NY
5,764 posts, read 3,407,741 times
Reputation: 5133
Quote:
Originally Posted by demo13 View Post
txting her ex to make my self a bit clear,and how i know?well i play football with him,and i was with him when he recived a txt from her,should i say that she doesn't know that im a god friend with him?and when i ask her about it she lie and that hurt me badly,but i went over that and i forgive and try to move on,and focus on us
Why didn't you just say that in the beginning? You're adding all the drama and non-important details but fail to say up front that she was texting her ex. If I were you, I'd leave her alone and wait to see what this baby looks like when it's born.

By the way, did you actually see this text? Did the ex show it to you or are you simply going by what he said to you?
 
Old 04-18-2012, 11:03 AM
 
18 posts, read 10,525 times
Reputation: 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by bellakin123 View Post
Why didn't you just say that in the beginning? You're adding all the drama and non-important details but fail to say up front that she was texting her ex. If I were you, I'd leave her alone and wait to see what this baby looks like when it's born.

By the way, did you actually see this text? Did the ex show it to you or are you simply going by what he said to you?
i didn't tell that simply because every single membar is asking for diferent info and to be honest no one read's a long thread,and yes i see the txt because i am a god friend with him and when i start dating with her i found out that he was going out with her for 6 month's and the fall out because she was acusing him of cheating which i didn't want get into that,,was not off my buesness,past is past and should be left alone,that's how i think
 
Old 04-18-2012, 11:03 AM
 
3,098 posts, read 1,925,732 times
Reputation: 3620
Quote:
Originally Posted by bellakin123 View Post
Why didn't you just say that in the beginning? You're adding all the drama and non-important details but fail to say up front that she was texting her ex. If I were you, I'd leave her alone and wait to see what this baby looks like when it's born.

By the way, did you actually see this text? Did the ex show it to you or are you simply going by what he said to you?
yes...if she knows you know the ex and play football with him, then I don't get why she would attempt to lie about it...but anyway I also wonder what the actual text said..just contacting an ex isn't necessarily inappropriate, but the fact she didn't mention it is interesting.
 
Old 04-18-2012, 11:06 AM
 
Location: SF Bay Area
11,667 posts, read 5,949,948 times
Reputation: 8645
Okay now the details are coming out.
 
Old 04-18-2012, 11:08 AM
 
Location: Cumberland Co., TN
10,635 posts, read 10,257,941 times
Reputation: 10523
Quote:
Originally Posted by demo13 View Post
i NEVER said to her that baby is not mine,NEVER even cross my mind,what do you mean unsupportive?i was there for her what ever she needed me,im working night shift's during her first month i barely sleep a 2 or 3 hour's driving her to her frend's,buying stuff for her,bringing hot meals simply because she didnt feel god at the time,i bellive that after all of my effort what i did and what i put my self through i did deserve a bit of love,that's why i start doubting her love twoards me,because she just went cold twoards me and i was confussed and this is how i end up distrustful,
All we have to go by is what you tell, little by little might I add. When ones says they questioned their pregnant gf's fidelity that would imply you had doubts the baby is yours. What else would that mean. Your dating roughly 6 weeks and find out she is 2 weeks pregnant.
It is not supportive to push her away and make a deal about her morning sickness and hormonal changes.
 
Old 04-18-2012, 11:13 AM
 
3,098 posts, read 1,925,732 times
Reputation: 3620
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2mares View Post
All we have to go by is what you tell, little by little might I add. When ones says they questioned their pregnant gf's fidelity that would imply you had doubts the baby is yours. What else would that mean. Your dating roughly 6 weeks and find out she is 2 weeks pregnant.
It is not supportive to push her away and make a deal about her morning sickness and hormonal changes.
I must have missed the part about 6 weeks....6 weeks?...oh lord, this gets better and better
 
Old 04-18-2012, 11:13 AM
 
Location: Katonah, NY
15,475 posts, read 7,391,712 times
Reputation: 15270
Condoms, people!!! Condoms!!!
 
Old 04-18-2012, 11:16 AM
 
Location: Austin
773 posts, read 517,495 times
Reputation: 911
I would strongly encourage the OP to seek paternity testing with dispatch after the baby is born.

Around 1:3 children born out of wedlock were not the biological child of the putative father (the man who thought he fathered the child). These are not very good odds at all.

I worked in the legal field. Anecdotally, you'd be surprised at how many times a woman pointed the finger at the wrong guy — possibly because she really didn't know who the baby daddy was, possibly because he was the only one who offered to take responsibility, who the hell knows what reasoning goes into this?

Point being, OP, protect yourself. You've already indicated that your GF has given you some reason to mistrust her. Don't doubt your gut. Listen to it carefully and assume that what she says is true may not be true at all. You are way too young to get stuck supporting a child that you had no part of creating.
 
Old 04-18-2012, 11:24 AM
 
18 posts, read 10,525 times
Reputation: 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2mares View Post
All we have to go by is what you tell, little by little might I add. When ones says they questioned their pregnant gf's fidelity that would imply you had doubts the baby is yours. What else would that mean. Your dating roughly 6 weeks and find out she is 2 weeks pregnant.
It is not supportive to push her away and make a deal about her morning sickness and hormonal changes.
ok i sorry for small amount of info,i try to keep it simple and yet not forget anything
we are dating for almost 8 month's,around into the 6 month we found out that she is pregnant,and i know that is mine because at that time i was spending every day with her,i took 4 week's holidays to spend some quality time with her,she was always claiming that ex is ex and she doesnt not stay in touch with them which is fine with me,past is past and if u stay in god terms with ex that's also fine,but when i found out that this not true then i start doubting her
txt was about them randomly seening eachother on the street and just like nice to see you,normal buls***
from the week one we had some unplessend things going on with her sister,everytime if i wanted to take her out she was turning around saying that she feels sorry for her because she doesnt have boyfriend and she is highly depressed,we where coming from our nite out and you could clearly hear her crying in the other room which ruined all off my efort what i did that day to make my ex happy,i never questined her going out with her friend on a girl's out,that was my day off playing games and relaxing with my friend,but the problems started when her sister was saying that she want's more girl's nite out,like every second weekend and during the week to go out,which not even me or my girl where not happy with
which lead to her being between me and her sister
we had some argument's due to our difrences but everyone has the plesent moment's
we where together almost every day,
then the drama started,
she found out that she is pregnant,hormons kick in she start acting all weird and cold twoards me and more i try to pleasure her more distant she went,she was feeling sick all the time and at that time i didnt understand her or how she feel's and i was not quite ready for that kinda situation,she went depressed and one thing after other here im where im now
she was not able to go out for a simple dinner,so i brought the dinner to her,which end up in a argument,everything was falling apart,she was snaping all the time wich make things even worse and me not been able to handle the situation properly i snap asweel,simply because i wanted to make her sure that im there for her and that i want to make her happy,i end up been needy and all that
can i say that not even for a min it didnt cross my mind that baby is not mine or that she cheated is just the fact that she lied,which lead to my insecurity what i admit,and after that happend what happend ((

Last edited by demo13; 04-18-2012 at 11:34 AM..
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