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After the second time you heard NO, regardless of how polite it was.
I was going to say that. You have shown interest clearly and she has declined. If she's interested she will call you, make time, and so on. And if not, then there are reasons why she said no.
It depends on the vibve she gives you . If you is genuinely interested but too busy or some other valid reason be patient. If you feel like you must convince her to go with u then forget it.
Now, she has a professional job that requires her to frequently travel around the country. I have asked her out to specific events in town, but each time I have she says she would love to but is out of town.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gatsby1925
Oops, have a quick correction I need to make. I looked at my text history and have only asked her our TWICE, not three times. Don't know how much of a difference that makes, but thank you second cup of coffee for clearing my brain!
Two thoughts pop into my head. First, try asking her by CALLING her...not through text. She's not taking you seriously maybe. I'd blow that off too.
Second, you are asking her to specific events on specific dates. Next time ask her out with an open-ended date/time. "hey, I'd love to take you out to dinner/drinks/movie/play...etc but I know you have a busy schedule...let me know what day would work best for you"
If she still declines then you have your answer...she's just not that interested.
He said each time she was traveling for work. I think that's a pretty legitimate reason not to take him up on his offer.
That’s right. But if she was interested it would be a bit different if she just went something like “Oooh, that sounds fun! Unfortunately I have to work. Hhhhmm you know, I think I will be free X dates of the month. Let me confirm and I’ll get back to you” or something like that. If she is interested, she will do something to go out. The ball would be in her court.
That’s right. But if she was interested it would be a bit different if she just went something like “Oooh, that sounds fun! Unfortunately I have to work. Hhhhmm you know, I think I will be free X dates of the month. Let me confirm and I’ll get back to you” or something like that. If she is interested, she will do something to go out. The ball would be in her court.
She would, except that he asked her to very specific events that aren't happening on X dates. I wouldn't offer up "but I'm available on such and such a date" because that would be kind of pretentious and assuming on my part. She doesn't know if his intention was just that he wanted company at these events (because that was the priority) or if he actually wanted to spend time with her.
That is why I suggested he CALL her and let her know he'd like to take HER out...not a "hey I'm going to the state fair, want to go?" type of invitation. That, to me, shows that his priority is the state fair, and it doesn't really matter who goes with him. So he'll ask me and if I don't want to go or can't he'll still go with someone else.
If he asked ME specifically to dinner or a movie or whatnot "hey, I'd like to take you to dinner, movie..etc" then he's showing that he wants to spend time with me. I'm not just a "filler" at that point. Even if he said, "hey...I'd like to spend some time with you, would you like to go to the state fair" that would show he is interested in HER.
Give it one more shot, but let her pick the date, since you don't know her schedule. If that doesn't work, then you know you're out of the running.
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