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Old 05-09-2012, 09:26 AM
 
8,402 posts, read 5,647,917 times
Reputation: 17471
I haven't engaged in random sex for many years but my criteria was;

1) I have to be attracted to them physically

2) They must be single

3) I have to like them, I don't need to love them, they just have to be nice

I have never found sex is better with someone I love personally. Sex to me is just sex. I am not a lovey dovey, romantic, oh my god you're the love of my life type. Sex is carnal and physical. I get the other stuff from conversations and deep meaningful talks.
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Old 05-09-2012, 09:27 AM
 
5,030 posts, read 2,759,535 times
Reputation: 2590
I guess there is something wrong with me if, being a guy, cannot see myself having sex with someone I am not in a serious committed loving relationship. Maybe there is something wrong for a gal to want to have sex simply because she’s horny. What a messed up world, huh?
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Old 05-09-2012, 09:28 AM
 
Location: TX
5,926 posts, read 2,231,631 times
Reputation: 2556
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20 View Post
Women can be prudish act more chaste than thou...but it's all about saving face, and guys know it. Ladies, don't act like we're some different kind of species and you're above being an animal.

You're still apes too, with the same animalistic desires as us. Don't pretend you're made of spirit, or are the virgin Mary or something.
Could you describe this in more detail please? I mean, some guys would accuse a woman of such arrogance just because she turned them down. I personally have yet to meet a woman who thinks men are literally of another species or that they're the virgin Mary...
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Old 05-09-2012, 09:29 AM
 
4,231 posts, read 2,637,507 times
Reputation: 5105
Quote:
Originally Posted by cpg35223 View Post
Okay. That's fine. But if you're really monogamous, then why the heck are you worried about women's inability to process a one-night stand?
It's about not necessarily having an emotional attachment to the guy you are having sex with. Not expecting everything from every person that comes into your life in a sexual capacity.

Learning that there are relationships based on sex and possibly friendship but without love and that it's an okay thing to experience without expecting every sexual encounter to be "it".
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Old 05-09-2012, 09:34 AM
 
Location: Pittsburgh
12,977 posts, read 10,277,504 times
Reputation: 19903
Quote:
Originally Posted by findly185 View Post
It's about not necessarily having an emotional attachment to the guy you are having sex with. Not expecting everything from every person that comes into your life in a sexual capacity.
I think you're overemphasizing the emotional attachment aspect of sex. I don't have one-night stands, but I also don't view every sexual partner as my soul mate. I do have to feel a connection and a sense of trust with him, though, because for me sex is more involved than a sneeze.
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Old 05-09-2012, 09:35 AM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,693 posts, read 18,109,773 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vic 2.0 View Post
Could you describe this in more detail please? I mean, some guys would accuse a woman of such arrogance just because she turned them down. I personally have yet to meet a woman who thinks men are literally of another species or that they're the virgin Mary...
The whole tired old 'men are just animals who want sex', implying they are somehow 'above' is, from SOME women.
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Old 05-09-2012, 09:35 AM
 
Location: US
5,148 posts, read 5,288,368 times
Reputation: 5137
Quote:
Originally Posted by findly185 View Post
Its not to live like one of the boys. It's being smart and not bringing an unwanted child into this world (there are enough). I am in a LTR relationship now, so I am currently not looking to get laid by anyone but my BF.

Thanks, said this a billion times now.

You are welcome. I agree its smart for you not to bring a child into the world if that is your goal. It doesn't change the fact you may face complications from your choices.

Just like CPG..I have seen people flip the breeder switch despite their previous feeling about it.
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Old 05-09-2012, 09:35 AM
 
Location: Austin
2,173 posts, read 1,377,381 times
Reputation: 2081
Quote:
Originally Posted by LookinForMayberry View Post
Okay, my thoughts are how sad for you that you share your body with someone you do not care about, and then expect others to become just as detached as yourself. Not that you don't have many just like you to associate with, if you could call it an association.

Personally, sex without emotional attachment is not a need for me. In fact, the idea leaves me cold. Why not just get yourself a toy?
Yes, I am not sure why a woman would even WANT to disconnect. Why all the "empowerment" feelings from empty sex? I will never understand that, either, and frankly, I wonder if the women who claim pride in this stance are in denial.
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Old 05-09-2012, 09:38 AM
 
4,231 posts, read 2,637,507 times
Reputation: 5105
Quote:
Originally Posted by Opsimathia View Post
You are welcome. I agree its smart for you not to bring a child into the world if that is your goal. It doesn't change the fact you may face complications from your choices.

Just like CPG..I have seen people flip the breeder switch despite their previous feeling about it.
I understand the risks. I have talked about them ad nauseam with about 5 different OBGYN's. This is something that is worth the risk to me.
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Old 05-09-2012, 09:39 AM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,693 posts, read 18,109,773 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by redvelvet709 View Post
Yes, I am not sure why a woman would even WANT to disconnect. Why all the "empowerment" feelings from empty sex? I will never understand that, either, and frankly, I wonder if the women who claim pride in this stance are in denial.
Isn't the orgasm more of a psychological/emotional/even spiritual experience anyway? That's the goal of sex, aside from reproduction of course, but these days most sex isn't for that. Ultimately speaking...it's the same for men or women.
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