Finding the right lady who doesnt want kids is frustrating (married, woman)

[stan4]

Originally Posted by 1ceTr0n

Children damn well frighten me. The amount of sacrifice, willpower, mental stability, money, time, sanity required .

See, here's the thing.
While not all women are good mothers or even good people, good MOTHERS are much more likely to be the ones who have the qualities you are looking for in a mate.

A WOMAN who does not want children is much more likely to be more self-absorbed, less nurturing, less outwardly caring, etc. So then you are in a catch 22, right? You want someone who has the qualities of a woman well-suited to motherhood, but you're searching in a small pool that is likely most filled with women who are not possessing those qualities.

I am SURE there are kind, generous, funny, nurturing, sweet women who don't want children. I just think that is going to be like finding a needle in a haystack.

[stan4]

Originally Posted by callmemaybe

I want kids but I find it kind of disturbing society expects you to literally worship your children.

That's a new thing with the last batch of parents and I think the pendulum is (hopefully) swinging back to rational child rearing again.

[Huckleberry3911948]

if u study divorce law, and how it is practiced u will see why they want kids.
go hang out in a divorce court for the day, a real eye opener.
if you wana see hostility and the need for mod intervention, use the word prenup on CDF.

[chielgirl]

Originally Posted by stan4

See, here's the thing.
While not all women are good mothers or even good people, good MOTHERS are much more likely to be the ones who have the qualities you are looking for in a mate.

A WOMAN who does not want children is much more likely to be more self-absorbed, less nurturing, less outwardly caring, etc. So then you are in a catch 22, right? You want someone who has the qualities of a woman well-suited to motherhood, but you're searching in a small pool that is likely most filled with women who are not possessing those qualities.

I am SURE there are kind, generous, funny, nurturing, sweet women who don't want children. I just think that is going to be like finding a needle in a haystack.

Finding those qualities in childfree people is like finding a needed in a haystack?
I guess you've never seen selfish, self-absorbed parents.
The're pretty much the norm.

[luckynumber4]

Originally Posted by stan4

See, here's the thing.
While not all women are good mothers or even good people, good MOTHERS are much more likely to be the ones who have the qualities you are looking for in a mate.

A WOMAN who does not want children is much more likely to be more self-absorbed, less nurturing, less outwardly caring, etc. So then you are in a catch 22, right? You want someone who has the qualities of a woman well-suited to motherhood, but you're searching in a small pool that is likely most filled with women who are not possessing those qualities.

I am SURE there are kind, generous, funny, nurturing, sweet women who don't want children. I just think that is going to be like finding a needle in a haystack.

This is complete BS and is definitely in the running for dumbest post I've ever seen on CD.

[malamute]

There are more than enough women who never want kids or never had any. Many career women over 40 are past any biological clock going off on them. I kind of agree that women with adult kids would still have the mom in them, they might rather enjoy spending time with grandchildren if not now, later on and someone who really doesn't want to be around kids might want to avoid them. These former moms or always moms might want to travel to visit adult kids with grandchildren and everything. It's really not doing them a favor if you would resent that kind of thing.

[stan4]

Originally Posted by luckynumber4

This is complete BS and is definitely in the running for dumbest post I've ever seen on CD.

What a helpful post.

Care discussing actual points you disagree with?
Or are you in the running for the most useless post on CD?

Clearly the op is having difficulty meeting women who don't want kids who have specific qualities...the whole premise of the thread is that these women are hard to find. So do enlighten...

[stan4]

Originally Posted by chielgirl

Finding those qualities in childfree people is like finding a needed in a haystack?
I guess you've never seen selfish, self-absorbed parents.
The're pretty much the norm.

Perhaps you didn't read the first sentence about how not even all people who are mothers are good people.

I've seen tons of self-absorbed people of all kinds.
But at the core of not wanting children is the unwillingness to be selfless.
The op AND another poster one here (bob?) even spelled this out as their big reason.

So while not all parents are good and selfless people, the good ones tend to be.

[luckynumber4]

Originally Posted by stan4

What a helpful post.

Care discussing actual points you disagree with?
Or are you in the running for the most useless post on CD?

Clearly the op is having difficulty meeting women who don't want kids who have specific qualities...the whole premise of the thread is that these women are hard to find. So do enlighten...

Nope not worth my time. You can keep believing your silly stereotypes.

[luckynumber4]

Have you tried online dating?