U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 1.5 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Jump to a detailed profile or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Business Search - 14 Million verified businesses
Search for:  near: 
 
 
Old 06-12-2012, 03:02 PM
 
3,421 posts, read 1,239,560 times
Reputation: 1214

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
This is something I never understood about the term "friend zone". I think it's a concept invented by guys. Some things about GuySpeak I just don't try to understand.
Meanwhile...back on Earth, friendships between the sexes is a normal thing, not a purgatory.
It can be purgatory if I wanted to date you or have sex with you and you didnt feel the same way. That is the whole concept of the friendzone, the girl/guy only sees you as a friend and not a romantic interest.
Quick reply to this message

 
Old 06-12-2012, 03:33 PM
Status: "Meanest zen master" (set 11 days ago)
 
8,823 posts, read 5,047,486 times
Reputation: 17051
Quote:
Originally Posted by nighttrain55 View Post
It can be purgatory if I wanted to date you or have sex with you and you didnt feel the same way. That is the whole concept of the friendzone, the girl/guy only sees you as a friend and not a romantic interest.
But...do you blame the person who doesn't feel the same? Did they "friendzone" you out of malice? Selfishness? Rudeness?

Because it seems like those complaining about it feel that it they have been victimized. They seem to believe something was "done" to them, rather than just finding themselves in the very common and benign situation of mismatched attraction.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-12-2012, 03:48 PM
 
3,421 posts, read 1,239,560 times
Reputation: 1214
Quote:
Originally Posted by zentropa View Post
But...do you blame the person who doesn't feel the same? Did they "friendzone" you out of malice? Selfishness? Rudeness?

Because it seems like those complaining about it feel that it they have been victimized. They seem to believe something was "done" to them, rather than just finding themselves in the very common and benign situation of mismatched attraction.
Well I guess it depends on how you look at it. I dont think anybody who complains about the friendzone think it was done of malice or selfishness. With that being said, guys and girls do become a victim of the friendzone because they didnt have what it takes to reach that level of attraction that was needed. I was a victim of the friendzone many times, and I was upset I fell victim to it, but I never thought I was put into the friendzone out of malice.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-12-2012, 04:08 PM
 
Location: New Jersey
8,739 posts, read 4,980,157 times
Reputation: 7294
Quote:
Originally Posted by 14Bricks View Post
Two things. Number one, men all have different taste. What I find attractive another man might not. I'll be out with one of my male friends and see a women and I'll be like she's cute and he'll be like no, and vice versa. Number two I truly believe that there is somebody for everybody.

no. 1 -- well so they say. all these men that are open to so many types of women, yea okay. I'm sure they exist somewhere.

no. 2 -- is a joke. if someone wants to keep telling themselves that, based on zero or little past success -- their choice.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-12-2012, 04:13 PM
 
14,755 posts, read 15,343,459 times
Reputation: 8199
I used to put some women in the "friend zone."

Now, I just avoid women I'd put in the "friend zone" because their motives are different from mine and I don't need the headache.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-12-2012, 04:18 PM
 
Location: San Antonio, TX
822 posts, read 558,241 times
Reputation: 1245
There are three or four girls I've friendzoned recently, and it's because I'm not attracted to them. If I thought they were hot, obviously things would be different.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-12-2012, 04:20 PM
 
Location: Middle America
18,137 posts, read 15,621,234 times
Reputation: 21234
Quote:
Originally Posted by 14Bricks View Post
Two things. Number one, men all have different taste. What I find attractive another man might not. I'll be out with one of my male friends and see a women and I'll be like she's cute and he'll be like no, and vice versa. Number two I truly believe that there is somebody for everybody.
Which is EXACTLY why it makes no sense to say, "Hot women don't get 'friend zoned.' What is hot to one person isn't to the next...if you're not attraction material to one guy (or girl), it doesn't logically follow that it's because you are empirically unattractive. Attraction is individual. It's not as simple as, "You're unattractive if a guy's not ready to jump you no matter what."
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-12-2012, 04:27 PM
 
Location: New Jersey
8,739 posts, read 4,980,157 times
Reputation: 7294
Quote:
Originally Posted by TabulaRasa View Post
Which is EXACTLY why it makes no sense to say, "Hot women don't get 'friend zoned.' What is hot to one person isn't to the next...if you're not attraction material to one guy (or girl), it doesn't logically follow that it's because you are empirically unattractive. Attraction is individual. It's not as simple as, "You're unattractive if a guy's not ready to jump you no matter what."

Yea but men generally find the same types of women attractive over and over again. Deny all you want that they don't though. That's why some women are constantly friend zoned, they're not considered attractive enough for men.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-12-2012, 04:34 PM
 
Location: Middle America
18,137 posts, read 15,621,234 times
Reputation: 21234
Yep, I mentioned that earlier.

The guys I know have very definite physical "types," from which they don't really deviate. My most serious relationships, to date, have been with guys who had nothing in common outside of the fact that they were all guys. I've always found a lot of different things to be attractive.

As I mentioned, I got "friend zoned" by two guys when I was a teen, both of whom were/are attracted to an ideal that's basically the polar opposite of my look...dark where I'm blonde, swarthy where I'm pale, petite and slender where I'm tall and athletic, angular where I'm curvaceous. So I wasn't attractive to them They're not attracted to my looks. But obviously, to all the other guys I dated before and since, I was/am attractive. Not all men find the same thing attractive.
Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-12-2012, 04:36 PM
 
3,421 posts, read 1,239,560 times
Reputation: 1214
Quote:
Originally Posted by TabulaRasa View Post
Which is EXACTLY why it makes no sense to say, "Hot women don't get 'friend zoned.' What is hot to one person isn't to the next...if you're not attraction material to one guy (or girl), it doesn't logically follow that it's because you are empirically unattractive. Attraction is individual. It's not as simple as, "You're unattractive if a guy's not ready to jump you no matter what."
If you want to be technical, yes a hot woman or guy can get friendzoned, but chances of that happening are much smaller than somebody like me. I dont consider myself to be attractive and I have gotten friendzoned plenty of times.
Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


 
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:
Over $84,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
Similar Threads

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2014, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25 - Top