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Old 06-29-2012, 01:15 AM
 
900 posts, read 1,702,256 times
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I was with him 1 yr then on and off for 2. The last breakup did not go well. He is with someone I suspect he may have cheated on me with now. His mom wants to see me & i told her that probably would be fine. However I am starting to think its probably better if I dont. What should I say to her and do you guys think I should even see her in the first place? Thank you
Im thinking of saying , "turns out its not going to work this weekend/ week after all. Sorry , take care , hope you have a good trip , though" (she doesnt live in my city , just visiting.)

Last edited by maddog1; 06-29-2012 at 01:49 AM..
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Old 06-29-2012, 02:25 AM
 
Location: Atlantis
3,016 posts, read 3,910,427 times
Reputation: 8867
Nothing says "psycho" like a formal meeting with one of your ex's parents once the relationship is over.


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Old 06-29-2012, 02:32 AM
 
Location: The cupboard under the sink
3,993 posts, read 8,926,902 times
Reputation: 8105
I guess it depends on the purpose of the meeting.

One of my ex's was a bit of an ass, but her mother was a real nice person, and we got on really well as friends.

Until I moved away, I used to see her around quite regularly.

I split with my ex, not her family.

If you guys had never got on, I could see you being more concerned, but maybe she just thought fondly of you ?
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Old 06-29-2012, 04:59 AM
 
Location: a primitive state
11,395 posts, read 24,452,731 times
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If you felt you had developed a bond with the mom, yes. If her request is out of the blue or uncharacteristic, she may be planning to say something you'll find unpleasant, like your ex is getting married, expecting a baby, or is dating trash. Or as a friend's ex's mom did to her: blame her for all of her partner's unhappiness and anxiety over the past several years.

Yes, be cautious.
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Old 06-29-2012, 05:00 AM
 
Location: NoVa
18,431 posts, read 34,360,429 times
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I wouldn't, were it me. There are some family members of exes that were just wonderful people, but I think if I met with them it would probably be some kind of ticket to assure the ex somehow trying to come back into my life somehow or another, and that, I do not want.

I have actually done it in the past, and it is what happened, and bam! A sucky year of my life come and gone, lol.
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Old 06-29-2012, 05:05 AM
 
Location: Australia
4,001 posts, read 6,272,868 times
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I avoid my ex MIL like the plague.

Last time she came to town she turned up on my doorstep...what a shock.

She's a nice lady but I hate her son so what's there to say? Not much.
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Old 06-29-2012, 05:12 AM
 
Location: NoVa
18,431 posts, read 34,360,429 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MsAnnThrope View Post
I avoid my ex MIL like the plague.

Last time she came to town she turned up on my doorstep...what a shock.

She's a nice lady but I hate her son so what's there to say? Not much.
I cringe when I see my ex mil. She was NOT a nice lady.
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Old 06-29-2012, 05:22 AM
 
Location: TX
6,486 posts, read 6,388,858 times
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How long has it been since the last breakup?

Personally, I believe in cutting ties with my exes' close friends and family members. And that goes double for those with which I had a "bad breakup". I just don't think I could shake the awkwardness of it all as time progressed.
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Old 06-29-2012, 05:35 AM
 
14,375 posts, read 18,374,578 times
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I adore my one ex's stepfather. If he wanted to grab drinks when he was in town, I'd totally be fine with it. We have about 10 years of book discussions to catch up on.

However, if you didn't have a close relationship with the mother, what's the reason for the visit? If this makes you uncomfortable, you CAN back out. What do you WANT? What are you comfortable with? It's really odd that she wants to visit with you if you weren't close with each other. Figure out what your boundaries are and what you want. Then go from there. It doesn't matter what SHE wants and it doesn't matter what the other people on this board think is "normal." What is RIGHT for you?
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Old 06-29-2012, 05:48 AM
 
Location: Heart of Dixie
1,298 posts, read 2,238,837 times
Reputation: 1604
If you were close prior to the break up, yes, if not, prolly she is just being nosey.
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