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It sounds like you need a new start, a new town, a new job, a new life. Look at it as the adventure of your life. You are young and have your whole life ahead of you, it is time for a new adventure. Look online and find some towns or cities that have a lot of singles, especially college towns. Pick one in an area that you like and begin checking out jobs. Good luck to you!
Well, by the looks of things it's gonna be Tucson or Phoenix.
MAybe hang out at a bar or two, just to get some socializing. Drinking a couple beers will loosen you up to be able to talk to girls. When I used to hang at the bar I had SO MANY friends and some were the shy guys. The conversation was better!! But, then again I am a different type of girl hanging out at the bar (professional, couple degrees, mature vs. the younger, stupid girls.) LOL It's worth a shot.
MAybe hang out at a bar or two, just to get some socializing. Drinking a couple beers will loosen you up to be able to talk to girls. When I used to hang at the bar I had SO MANY friends and some were the shy guys. The conversation was better!! But, then again I am a different type of girl hanging out at the bar (professional, couple degrees, mature vs. the younger, stupid girls.) LOL It's worth a shot.
I'm not into the bar scene, but a fair shake of my friends are.
D.Kid, its like fishing. put the bait out infront of the fish ya want as often and as long as ya can. Bars out, hit the groc. store often. go to church every sunday. hit the malls, something. when you see a fish ya want, find out when and where they will be and shop then. if you keep bumping into them then you can start a conversation. get off of here and get milk at one store, bread at another, steak at the next, etc lol
I was actually kind of afraid that telling a girl you like about your hardships would scare them away. Or so, that's what I've thought for awhile.
Hardships isn't what you talk about on the first date. You talk about what you're studying, hobbies, where you're from. Deeper stuff is for later dates. A mature person won't be put off by your hardships at all. And you're assuming that the women you meet will have had smooth sailing all their lives. That's a big assumption. Stuff happens to people. How they handle it determines whether it builds character and makes them a better person, or twists them or breaks them.
Any woman who's put off by your hardships isn't the woman for you. Look at your trials as a built-in screening device. They'll help you weed out the superficial types.
The only thing I'd be a little concerned about is, are you over your experiences? Have you recovered? If you find yourself dwelling on them, the answer is "no", and you should consider getting some professional help, some grief counseling, or something. The health center at the university should have free counseling available, or could refer you to a counseling center on campus. This is the only time in your life that you'll have access to FREE counseling, which normally costs an arm and a leg. If you're still emotionally kind of raw from your experiences, you should get some help processing the events. Otherwise, you may find yourself dwelling on these experiences when you're on dates, and that will turn people off. It's not that the facts themselves will turn people off, but the tendency to obsess about them will. Get healing while you can. It doesn't mean you're crazy, it only means you need a little boost to get over the bumps in life. Acknowledge that you've been through a lot. It's not easy. Unresolved emotions about difficult or traumatic events could get in the way of your studies, too. Keep an eye on that.
Hardships isn't what you talk about on the first date. You talk about what you're studying, hobbies, where you're from. Deeper stuff is for later dates. A mature person won't be put off by your hardships at all. And you're assuming that the women you meet will have had smooth sailing all their lives. That's a big assumption. Stuff happens to people. How they handle it determines whether it builds character and makes them a better person, or twists them or breaks them.
Any woman who's put off by your hardships isn't the woman for you. Look at your trials as a built-in screening device. They'll help you weed out the superficial types.
The only thing I'd be a little concerned about is, are you over your experiences? Have you recovered? If you find yourself dwelling on them, the answer is "no", and you should consider getting some professional help, some grief counseling, or something. The health center at the university should have free counseling available, or could refer you to a counseling center on campus. This is the only time in your life that you'll have access to FREE counseling, which normally costs an arm and a leg. If you're still emotionally kind of raw from your experiences, you should get some help processing the events. Otherwise, you may find yourself dwelling on these experiences when you're on dates, and that will turn people off. It's not that the facts themselves will turn people off, but the tendency to obsess about them will. Get healing while you can. It doesn't mean you're crazy, it only means you need a little boost to get over the bumps in life. Acknowledge that you've been through a lot. It's not easy. Unresolved emotions about difficult or traumatic events could get in the way of your studies, too. Keep an eye on that.
Ever since grandma passed things have simmered down. Dad doesn't ride my tail as hard as he used to. When my friend passed, and then after that, his cousin the girl I liked rejected me, it didn't affect my studies too much. The only time that it really affected my studies is when I was actually living with grandma during her early stages and quick descent into dementia and took attention away from my school work. School, in fact was a welcome distraction and I still got the Associates Degree.
Whenever I replay all 18 months of what had happened in my head, it still hurts a bit. But I suppose that is natural. There were a few times, every couple days or a few weeks, couple months even, where I replay it all and just ask "why?" and it hurts.
Whenever I replay all 18 months of what had happened in my head, it still hurts a bit. But I suppose that is natural. There were a few times, every couple days or a few weeks, couple months even, where I replay it all and just ask "why?" and it hurts.
Well, give it time. You have all summer, and by the fall, when school starts, you should be feeling better. It sounds like you'll have a lot on your plate, so don't expect dating to happen instantly. These things can take time. It sounds like you have a lot going for you, personality-wise. Someday, some woman will discover you, and will be glad she did. It may take time, but it'll happen. Don't worry about the details. I guess guys get nervous about being inexperienced, but if someone really cares about you, it won't matter. And not all women are experienced in college, either. You're a long way away from that particular worry, in any case.
Well, give it time. You have all summer, and by the fall, when school starts, you should be feeling better. It sounds like you'll have a lot on your plate, so don't expect dating to happen instantly. These things can take time. It sounds like you have a lot going for you, personality-wise. Someday, some woman will discover you, and will be glad she did. It may take time, but it'll happen. Don't worry about the details. I guess guys get nervous about being inexperienced, but if someone really cares about you, it won't matter. And not all women are experienced in college, either. You're a long way away from that particular worry, in any case.
With the University I'm gunning for their classes start on August 20th. I'm still waiting on acceptance.
Then after that, loans, financial aid, dorms, looking for a job.
I just want change so badly, but I have to sit on my hands until I get accepted.
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You have all summer, and by the fall, when school starts, you should be feeling better. It sounds like you'll have a lot on your plate, so don't expect dating to happen instantly. These things can take time. It sounds like you have a lot going for you, personality-wise. Someday, some woman will discover you, and will be glad she did. It may take time, but it'll happen. Don't worry about the details. I guess guys get nervous about being inexperienced, but if someone really cares about you, it won't matter. And not all women are experienced in college, either. You're a long way away from that particular worry, in any case.
