Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I don't know the whole story, but if you haven't done anything wrong and you've just grown apart, you shouldn't have to "win" someone back. Good relationships should be on equal footing and if you are able to win her back, what's stopping her from doing this again when things aren't going well?
It isn't fair to you to be strung along because she's stressed out and figuring out her feelings. Move on and maybe you can be friends with her much later.
This is the second time he's posted about this issue, says he re-posted with MAJOR new details (?) but really it's just because he didn't like the advice he got first time round.
He isn't gonna like it this time either.
Controlling a person is one step away from abusing them.
Do you see where I'm going with this? It's all about YOU, YOUR wants, wishes, desires, opinions.
She doesn't feel the same way. Period. You can try all you want, I never said there was anything WRONG with anything....I just said SHE'S DUMPED YOU.
Go ahead, make a fool of yourself...whatever. Be careful you're not arrested for stalking.
I agree with your post, but his now ex shouldn't have told him there's a chance for them to get back together. If she hadn't thrown that out there, there'd be no reason for the OP to try to win her back. She's playing games and needs to realize what she's doing. Even if the OP isn't thinking about her wants, desires, etc. it's hard to think past "there's a chance we could get back together."
The ball is in her court now. It is ultimately going to be up to her if she wishes to continue your intimate relationship. Give her some space and time. I know it is cliche' but there is a saying "if you love something set it free, if it comes back to you it is yours, and if it doesn't it was never meant to be".
Trying to win someone back is almost always counter productive. You become something else when you do it and it tends to be something that the person you are trying to win back can not stand to be around. Take the "pleading" that the OP mentioned for example. Not only is that not likely to work - worse when she sees him coming she probably thinks "Oh no - now I have to listen to all that needy pleading again" and slowly you become something she does not want to be around.
The only thing you really can do - and I have seen it work as often as I have seen it fail so it is not sure fire by any means - is to simply do your best to return to being the person you were when she fell for you in the first place. Be the person you were then as much as you can - do the types of things you used to do then.
If you are lucky - and as I said sometimes it works - she will remember why she fell for you in the first place and do so again. If not however then at least you still have a chance to salvage the friendship which - as I said - the needy pleading and begging probably damaged or destroyed.
I agree with your post, but his now ex shouldn't have told him there's a chance for them to get back together. If she hadn't thrown that out there, there'd be no reason for the OP to try to win her back. She's playing games and needs to realize what she's doing. Even if the OP isn't thinking about her wants, desires, etc. it's hard to think past "there's a chance we could get back together."
I disagree.
I can see how this all went down in my mind's eye.
It would've been a bit of a scene, she wanted to calm things down a bit, so she threw him a bone. "maybe, one day..." etc.
False hope maybe but the lady may have put up with a lot of controlling type behaviour so I'm not going to judge her methods. I've done it myself.
I can tell you, as far as "dealing with stress"....you would KILL for a nice supportive bloke to help you through stressful times. The fact that she's pushed him away tells me he's part of the problem, not part of her solution.
Win her back? What is your freaking problem? There are BILLIONS of women out there and you are trying to win this woman back- tell me more about her, does she look like Angelina Jolie? Didnt think so! What is it about this woman that makes so incredible? I have lost faith on these guys!
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
