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Old 09-30-2007, 09:43 PM
 
Location: the show-me state
672 posts, read 1,511,976 times
Reputation: 742

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Hello everyone, I just want to hear some thoughts about this snooping around in each others things stuff. Some years ago, I dated this woman for awhile there, and she was a TRUE snoop of a person. You know how after a while, you kind of get to trusting someone enough to leave them alone at your house, while you're at work, or whatever. It took me a month or so to realize it, but I don't believe there was a single box, or other container in my house, that she didn't snoop thru. She never stole anything,(except my right to privacy), but I think that this is SO wrong. I believe that even married couples ought to be able to have a chest, or other container of some type, that is for their own private stuff only. And, I believe the persons mate should respect that, and not snoop thru it. What does everyone else think about this?
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Old 09-30-2007, 11:37 PM
JMX
 
Location: Somewhere unloading worthless FRN's
313 posts, read 786,908 times
Reputation: 387
I think snooping is disrespectful and shows a lack of trust. I wouldn't continue dating a woman who snooped excessively like your ex.
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Old 09-30-2007, 11:45 PM
 
Location: southern california
49,762 posts, read 46,858,501 times
Reputation: 41011
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dennis58 View Post
Hello everyone, I just want to hear some thoughts about this snooping around in each others things stuff. Some years ago, I dated this woman for awhile there, and she was a TRUE snoop of a person. You know how after a while, you kind of get to trusting someone enough to leave them alone at your house, while you're at work, or whatever. It took me a month or so to realize it, but I don't believe there was a single box, or other container in my house, that she didn't snoop thru. She never stole anything,(except my right to privacy), but I think that this is SO wrong. I believe that even married couples ought to be able to have a chest, or other container of some type, that is for their own private stuff only. And, I believe the persons mate should respect that, and not snoop thru it. What does everyone else think about this?
i know its wrong. but i would say bek of the creeping distrust between the sexes you get this behavior.
people lie a lot. as you mature you begin to realize the magnitude of this statement. but she made a fatal mistake. she did not have permission to go thru your things. poor boundaries another serious flaw in the relationship.
distrust is probably number one killer of relationships.
stephen s
san diego ca
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Old 10-01-2007, 12:05 AM
 
Location: San Gabriel Valley, CA
12,130 posts, read 12,606,770 times
Reputation: 8082
I don't snoop on my husband. He has his computer in the office and has stuff there but I don't really feel the need to snoop.
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Old 10-01-2007, 12:48 AM
 
Location: Naptowne, Alaska
14,943 posts, read 25,074,732 times
Reputation: 13125
Maybe she just wanted to get to know you? Or was looking for your baby pictures!
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Old 10-01-2007, 02:39 AM
 
Location: In My Own Reality
1,461 posts, read 1,439,339 times
Reputation: 1621
I admit that if something is left in the open I might be nosy enough to look at it. But I think that going through boxes, drawers and looking at a persons computer is just wrong and a definite invasion of privacy.

If you are worried someone is lying to you there are other ways to check that don't involve touching their stuff.

I am very touchy about my stuff

Last edited by GoddessofRandomThoughts; 10-01-2007 at 02:41 AM.. Reason: bad spelling
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Old 10-01-2007, 06:08 AM
 
Location: In the sunshine on a ship with a plank
3,413 posts, read 5,873,912 times
Reputation: 2167
When I was younger I used to snoop but once I was involved with someone who snooped through my stuff I realized what a violation that is.

So, no more snooping for me!
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Old 10-01-2007, 07:14 AM
 
Location: Northeastern WI
20,229 posts, read 16,665,256 times
Reputation: 36927
There are reasons I choose to live alone and that is one of them. My roomies dont touch my stuff and I dont bother theirs, its plain and simple.
I've had people go through my stuff before, whatever they were looking for, and its made me less trusting to almost anyone. In fact, Im almost positive this particular person had a lot to do with theft identity, but cant prove it and by the time I paid the attorney for cleaning up that mess, could not afford to hire their p.i. to track down that culprit and press charges.
Unless someone asks you to look for something, which might mean going through an address book or phone, whatever, theres no reason to go through someone elses privacy.
Its different though, if someone is cheating and you know it but there are many ways you can find out.
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Old 10-01-2007, 07:33 AM
 
62 posts, read 103,269 times
Reputation: 35
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dennis58 View Post
Hello everyone, I just want to hear some thoughts about this snooping around in each others things stuff. Some years ago, I dated this woman for awhile there, and she was a TRUE snoop of a person. You know how after a while, you kind of get to trusting someone enough to leave them alone at your house, while you're at work, or whatever. It took me a month or so to realize it, but I don't believe there was a single box, or other container in my house, that she didn't snoop thru. She never stole anything,(except my right to privacy), but I think that this is SO wrong. I believe that even married couples ought to be able to have a chest, or other container of some type, that is for their own private stuff only. And, I believe the persons mate should respect that, and not snoop thru it. What does everyone else think about this?
I think it depends on the situation whether it's okay to snoop. My hubby and I met when he was struggling with trying to leave homosexuality behind. When we first moved in together, he kept a journal. One day, he left his journal out OPEN and I read it. He wrote about some fantasies he had, and when he got home from work that day, I made him move out. I have a right to know if someone is hurting me. So I do not believe I was wrong to snoop in this case.
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Old 10-01-2007, 07:50 AM
 
Location: Camano Island, WA
1,922 posts, read 6,323,272 times
Reputation: 1032
Quote:
Originally Posted by Power Surge View Post
There are reasons I choose to live alone and that is one of them. My roomies dont touch my stuff and I dont bother theirs, its plain and simple.


I so totally agree with that. I had a roommate years ago and I caught him going through my stuff. Needless to say he was out the door the next day.
There were other things that led up to it but that was the icing on the cake.
I think it's disrespectful to going rummaging through someones stuff.
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