U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 1.5 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Jump to a detailed profile or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Business Search - 14 Million verified businesses
Search for:  near: 
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 07-18-2012, 07:22 PM
 
Location: Viña del Mar, Chile
14,425 posts, read 11,966,595 times
Reputation: 13154
Quote:
Originally Posted by OngletNYC View Post
The facebook part is already done, no point in dwelling on the fact that he shouldn't have done it.

Yes he should bring it up, on his own terms, casually, and with stones in his sack. If he likes her, this isn't a "hold your breath and cross your fingers" weak male situation. He needs to convey interest and re-frame the conversation asap.

How is not bringing up facebook a weak male situation. I'm saying he should call her and not bring up adding on facebook because it's a non-issue. Talk to her like it never happened, because it really just doesn't matter.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 07-18-2012, 07:25 PM
 
103 posts, read 107,551 times
Reputation: 62
There's no question we had a great date. We talked about a second date before parting, but we can't meet again until she returns from her vacation in two weeks. She won't bring her laptop but told me to text her, sarcastically saying that it "makes her feel important" to get texts.

I suppose I should be more concerned with sending a few decent texts to maintain interest during her vacation than anything.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-18-2012, 07:51 PM
 
10,433 posts, read 6,983,561 times
Reputation: 15436
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ascension2012 View Post
Terrible advice...lol.. For one he is trying to come up with excuses and explain himself which is a first misstep. THen he is telling her that he's googling her after first date, that comes accross stalkerish and creepy as he11. Do nothing and downplay it if she brings it up.
He doesn't have to make excuses. He could be genuine and send her a "how are you " text, tell her he sent her a friend request and hopes it wasn't too forward. This way he covers his bases: let's her know he did it but also let's her know he understands there might be boundaries. Win win.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-18-2012, 09:43 PM
 
103 posts, read 107,551 times
Reputation: 62
Not only did she accept, she also posted on my wall. It's all good, folks.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-18-2012, 10:11 PM
 
23 posts, read 8,020 times
Reputation: 43
Quote:
Originally Posted by Johnny Ace View Post
Not only did she accept, she also posted on my wall. It's all good, folks.
Good for you. Just as I said, and most men should just follow what you did. There are no such thing as rules when it comes to dating. If a girl likes you she will respond back to you. It does not matter if you sent that friend request during the date, if she likes you she will accept the request. If you send her a friend request, text, flowers, or anything. If she is genuinely attracted and interested no games will be played. You wont hear any excuses.

It is really that cut and dry.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-18-2012, 11:32 PM
 
Location: Southern California
12,245 posts, read 8,891,098 times
Reputation: 7939
Quote:
Originally Posted by Johnny Ace View Post
I had an excellent first date Monday night. At the end of it she mentioned how her Facebook is restricted and impossible to find but mentioned something about how I'll get to see something "when I Friend you." I found her Facebook on my own and hit Send Friend Request, thinking it would bring up some options. Instead it just sent her a request and now I feel funny. I wanted to just send her a message along the lines of "Ha! Found you!" and am thinking of maybe texting this to her. If I repeal my request, she'll probably be confused since chances are it went to her email already.

I feel like a fool. I'm not sure how to handle it now... Maybe I should call and leave a message explaining that I did it my accident?
If she accepts you friend request, then don't worry about it ever again, and go out on another date.

[and if she doesn't, go out with her on another date anyway, and don't worry about it ever again]
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-18-2012, 11:40 PM
 
6,868 posts, read 11,302,422 times
Reputation: 3943
Quote:
Originally Posted by OngletNYC View Post
You sent "send friend request" and now are baffled that FB sent her a friend quest as a result? This is very strange to me.
There used to be two steps in the friend request process. I believe the 2nd step used to allow you to send a message along with your friend request. Now you just click the button and off the request goes without giving you a chance to think about whether it is a good idea or not.

So it's not that strange that he was surprised by it.

And in this case, I guess the one-step process benefited him.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-18-2012, 11:43 PM
 
Location: Southern California
12,245 posts, read 8,891,098 times
Reputation: 7939
Quote:
Originally Posted by Johnny Ace View Post
Not only did she accept, she also posted on my wall. It's all good, folks.
Excellent.

[]
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-19-2012, 08:08 AM
 
Location: Sugarland
5,179 posts, read 3,277,571 times
Reputation: 4105
I've only accidentally friended someone once while using my smartphone because it's easy to tap the wrong thing. He accepted me and then I had to delete him because I never would have intentionally sent him a friend request. lol It was just someone I went to school with though- not a romantic interest.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-19-2012, 08:28 AM
 
5,074 posts, read 2,497,356 times
Reputation: 5309
People always trying to overcomplicate dating, as if it isnt complex enough. See how that works out? She accepted, and you spent hours of your life worrying about nothing. Glad you didnt send her a text saying things like "uhhhh.ummmm...i googled you for awhile, and snooped around, and found your FB profile and had an accident and sent you a friend request, which i wanted to do, but it was only an accident...uhhh ummm. im really sorry, please forgive me" because chances are that she would not only not accepted your friend request but would have never seen you again. Guys, dont feel the need to explain yourself to a woman, espacialy one you barely know. It makes you look like a chump, trust me.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $84,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2014, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25 - Top