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It depends partly on attitude. I've been moderately overweight, but I didn't let it bother me. With the right clothes and a bright smile and outgoing attitude, I still look attractive. It's in the confidence and energy you exude, and how you package yourself. I've also seen overweight women get checked out by guys, and it's clear they like what they see. I've seen BBW women get engaged and married. If they have beautiful facial features, that seems to make a big difference.
That is a great point. I love it, I can absolutely see that as a big time probability. Those guys would love to approach her when she is beautiful and at the right weight but don't think they stand a chance. The problem with that is that when she is overweight she might also be approached by men who are desperate and not exactly good quality men because they think she is not in a position to be too picky about her choices of men because she is overweight. So it can backfire
This is very true, I see this everyday, I also notice that now BBW women have become picky and they do choose these worthless guys who are half their size. SMH.
I've seen BBW women get engaged and married. If they have beautiful facial features, that seems to make a big difference.
I know several BBW-type women in long-term relationships, and more even than their facial features, they never believed that they were unworthy of finding love. They know that they're not everyone's cup of tea, but they weren't going let that discourage them and sit at home with a bag over their heads.
Last edited by fleetiebelle; 07-19-2012 at 02:56 PM..
The problem with questions like this is that the majority of responses that you'll get are kneejerk replies that lean toward extremes (like how one poster showed two pictures; one of an "overweight" woman who wasn't fat at all, and the other was a picture of a woman who looked borderline anorexic.) Well, yeah, when you put it that way of course the former is more attractive than the latter, but she doesn't represent all the "overweight", and very few men like a stick figure. It seems like every time we get a "weight" thread, there will always be a poster who will put a picture of a super unhealthy skinny girl in an attempt to make guys who aren't attracted to "obese" women look like idiots.
Here's the deal: "Overweight" is way too broad a term. What is the majority of your weight made of? If you're mostly muscle,I find that very attractive. I know an MMA fighter who weighs in at 160 lbs at a heigh of 5'6", but she's all muscle and I think she is gorgeous and strong (would love to ask her out, but she is happily married.) On the other hand, if you're overweight and the majority of it is fat, then that's just not attractive. Obesity is just not attractive, be it from a man or from a woman. I just get tired of both guys and girl who are on the unhealthy heavy side make bitter remarks when the opposite sex doesn't find them attractive. If you really are frustrated and angry at that, do something about it! If I remained bitter about that, I would probably be a 200+ lb couch potato.
No, you don't have to be a bodybuilder or a fitness model in order to attract the opposite sex, but show that you care about your health! When it comes to who I like, I admit that I am attracted to muscular women, but I wouldn't look away from women who do other physical activities in order to stay healthy. I don't care if you're a bodybuilder, runner, soccer player, tennis player, boxer or an MMA fighter, just do something to stay in shape and keep active. I find exercise and a healthy diet to be something akin to other things we do to maintain our health and appearance everyday, like brushing our teeth, shaving and showering. I did reject someone because I wasn't attracted to her weight, but I also knew we wouldn't be compatible because I live a very fit lifestyle and she doesn't care at all about her's at all.
So make that lifestyle change. Stop feeling bitter, stop posting ridiculous pictures of super-skinny girls in an attempt to make you feel better about yourself and to make other men look stupid, and go out and do something to improve yourself!
Gatsby, overall this was a very good post. Sensible and well-thought. I have one minor complaint, if you will. I bolded a few key phrases above. Clearly you find muscular girls attractive. I believe you posted some comments about FBBs on the fitness forum as well. This is your preference, as you clearly state above and on those other discussions.
But the key word is "preference."
You go on to say the subsequent bolded statement. This time the concept of "preference" was missing from your statements. Perhaps I am unfairly nit-picking an otherwise fine post, but overweight people being "just not attractive" is also a matter of your personal preference. There are many out there who would disagree with that statement. I offer myself as "exhibit A."
I have been married to an average weight man and I am now married to an overweight man. Size does not make you better in bed. My husband now is much better in bed. Why? Because he actually cares how I feel and wants to please me. My former husband was not like that. I myself am overweight but I have dated guys of all different sizes. Yes looks are important and had I met my husband on the street I might not have gone out with him. We became friends first and I fell in love with his caring, loving personality. We have decided to lose weight together because we now have a daughter and we don't want her to grow up with the weight problems we have. But no, someone being better in bed has more to do with how much they care for you than their body size. If all you are interested in is a quick romp in the sack then looks might be the only thing you care about. If you are looking for a long term relationship then you might be able to overlook their "flaws" for a great personality. Just my two cents.
I have to amend my previous statement to say that the biggest difference for women is age. A 20ish year old woman will carry an extra 30 pounds in her hips, butt and breasts giving her a juicy, curvy appearance. I am pretty sure this is due to their high fertility as the body stores fat in a way that maintains sexual attractiveness for the purpose of reproduction. A 40ish year old woman carrying around 30 extra pounds will not look sexually attractive due to perimenopause, as fat is no longer stored in such a way to encourage being impregnated. Instead is likely stored around the abdominal section. (Occasionally it will be stored as saddlebags, but that happens less often.) Overweight at 20 - not a big problem. Overweight at 40 - very big problem. I can't speak to any fat storage differences when it comes to men as I have not paid any attention to that.
You are both right on point and hypocritical. Fat men do have it much worse. And you are 40 lbs overweight but puke at the thought of dating an overweight man. Nice work.
Oh well....what ya gonna do?
Fortunately the hunnies love me too...I'm thinking of posting a pic of my latest bf to "prove" it but wtf....I don't have anything to prove to people like you.
I was married to a fat man, I'll have you know. He just kept getting fatter. Ew.
My weight has stayed the same all my life. 40lb "over" is only on the charts...if you saw me, you'd probably say "20" cos I've got quite a heavy muscle layer.
Also, when a woman gets to my age its "your body or your face"...a low fat ratio often means you look thin and worn in the face. Screw that.
Fortunately the hunnies love me too...I'm thinking of posting a pic of my latest bf to "prove" it but wtf....I don't have anything to prove to people like you.
I was married to a fat man, I'll have you know. He just kept getting fatter. Ew.
My weight has stayed the same all my life. 40lb "over" is only on the charts...if you saw me, you'd probably say "20" cos I've got quite a heavy muscle layer.
Also, when a woman gets to my age its "your body or your face"...a low fat ratio often means you look thin and worn in the face. Screw that.
Yeah.....I bet you're just the hottest thing out there.
"People like me." What am I like? Well, I know one thing. I am not a hypocrite.
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