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Old 07-24-2012, 08:08 PM
 
Location: Australia
4,001 posts, read 6,270,045 times
Reputation: 6856

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I'm a bit older now so the people I know socially tend to be a bit older too, I'm talking in the 40-55 range.

One thing the guys especially all seem to have in common is - they're looking for love.

They don't want one night stands. They want a partner.

The guys I know all have good jobs, plenty of money, some have even been married before, done the wife-and-kids thing (who they are STILL paying for) and yet they are still floating aimlessly and unhappily around the world looking for love.

The women I know are gun-shy. Precious few of them want to pair up and settle down...most are either out of a long-term relationship that put them off for good, or have other issues that make them wary or unavailable, like sick elderly parents or demanding careers or kids.

It's like when you get older, the roles are reversed. All youngish girls and women seem to want is a boyfriend, and the guys all just want to play around. Fast forward 30 years and it's literally the other way around.

What's it like where you live?
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Old 07-24-2012, 08:17 PM
 
4,837 posts, read 8,852,845 times
Reputation: 3026
Quote:
Originally Posted by MsAnnThrope View Post
I'm a bit older now so the people I know socially tend to be a bit older too, I'm talking in the 40-55 range.

One thing the guys especially all seem to have in common is - they're looking for love.

They don't want one night stands. They want a partner.

The guys I know all have good jobs, plenty of money, some have even been married before, done the wife-and-kids thing (who they are STILL paying for) and yet they are still floating aimlessly and unhappily around the world looking for love.

The women I know are gun-shy. Precious few of them want to pair up and settle down...most are either out of a long-term relationship that put them off for good, or have other issues that make them wary or unavailable, like sick elderly parents or demanding careers or kids.

It's like when you get older, the roles are reversed. All youngish girls and women seem to want is a boyfriend, and the guys all just want to play around. Fast forward 30 years and it's literally the other way around.

What's it like where you live?

I don't see it quite like you. I guess it depends on how one is doing financially. Women who have big divorce settlements can afford to be choosey. Those who are not doing so well - as many claim - will be looking for a white knight.

Single men with a good financial situation, tend to be wary. They could easily lose it all with a poor decision. Men who have been taken to the cleaners by their ex are eager to find a woman. It doesn't hurt that they are nearly always the guys who women found desirable. Many women will therefore be eager to go for sloppy seconds....or thirds.
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Old 07-24-2012, 08:31 PM
 
Location: somewhere
181 posts, read 505,791 times
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This is probably an LA thing, but I think guys just want to be players/have one night stands up till they turn 50, sometimes longer. Depends how long they can pull it off looks-wise. This is a reason why I am still single. The 40-somethings I want to date are not interested in long term. The 55 and up guys love me, but I am not quite ready for that yet! Would be like dating my Dad or something. Ew.
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Old 07-24-2012, 08:56 PM
 
Location: New Zealand and Australia
7,454 posts, read 13,422,144 times
Reputation: 7783
Online dating is your friend
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Old 07-24-2012, 09:14 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
102,188 posts, read 107,790,902 times
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I wonder if it's a regional thing in Oz. Goldfrapp said there are oodles of women where she is who'd love to get married if a suitable candidate presented himself, but that the men are only interested in hanging out with the guys and going to SE Asia on sex jaunts. I think "how is it where you are" depends on the crowd you hang out with. One can probably find all kinds in most locales if one looked. I've never known any players. Only men who hoped to get married at some point. Some did in their 20's, made poor choices, got divorced, remarried eventually. Others took longer to find what they were looking for, and were content to study or work in the meantime, while pursuing hobbies. Some are still looking.
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Old 07-24-2012, 09:32 PM
 
Location: New Zealand and Australia
7,454 posts, read 13,422,144 times
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One common complaint from some aussie girls/women I know is alot of the guys are too immature for them.
Thats in the 25-35 age range though.
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Old 07-24-2012, 10:03 PM
 
Location: Up in the air
19,112 posts, read 30,617,448 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dave nz View Post
One common complaint from some aussie girls/women I know is alot of the guys are too immature for them.
Thats in the 25-35 age range though.
That can definitely be a huge issue. I don't mind 'immature' men, but he had better have his stuff together to give him the leeway to be immature if that makes sense.

I love guys that play video games, cosplay, geek out over superhero movies and make silly immature jokes. Of course, if they're living in their parents basement, have a part time minimum wage job and no real goals in life that's going to be a turn-off.

I can be immature at times, but I also have my life together for the most part.
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Old 07-24-2012, 10:17 PM
 
Location: Normal, IL
10 posts, read 19,064 times
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I'm 54 and have not had a serious relationship for at least 6 years but I really want one. Most middle age men here have too much baggage and/or looking only for younger women. Maybe I should move to Australia.
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Old 07-24-2012, 10:18 PM
 
18,836 posts, read 37,347,105 times
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Sure...men are looking. They want you to have a smoking hot body, a successful career, no children and parents that left you a large inheritance. Being submissively devoted to them is also required.
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Old 07-24-2012, 10:31 PM
 
Location: New Zealand and Australia
7,454 posts, read 13,422,144 times
Reputation: 7783
Quote:
Originally Posted by jasper12 View Post
Sure...men are looking. They want you to have a smoking hot body, a successful career, no children and parents that left you a large inheritance. Being submissively devoted to them is also required.
Women can be just as picky and IMO often even more picky as a general rule.
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