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Thank you dr74, your posts have helped a lot. if it comes down to it, as in the talk doesn't go well, i may have to try your idea!
trackwatch, shut up. i came for help because of the fact that he's not talking to me without getting angry. it has nothing to do with me being "too young" for sex.
Thank you dr74, your posts have helped a lot. if it comes down to it, as in the talk doesn't go well, i may have to try your idea!
trackwatch, shut up. i came for help because of the fact that he's not talking to me without getting angry. it has nothing to do with me being "too young" for sex.
So you come here for opinions/advice but slam a person that gives you a differing opinion?
You say you are not too young, do you have the means to take care of a child that may be created?
Yeah, I know you say you use protection but NONE aside a hysterectomy or cutting of your tubes is 100%.
you aren't giving an opinion. you are bashing me because of my age. and for the record, if a child would come into this world unplanned, i do have the means to take care of it. we both work night shift jobs that pay extremely well. hell, i could take care of a child just on my income alone. i'm done talking to you. like i've said in posts before, i am going to talk to him once he gets home. thank you for your attempt at helping.
The fact you come here asking opinions, proves you are.
That is rubbish I am afraid. There is no age one reaches when they are suddenly and magically able to cope with everything life and relationships throws at them. Advice from others always has the potential to be helpful irregardless of whether you are 12, 20 or 80. Someone coming to these forums and asking for advice - differing perspectives - or just a place to vent in no way highlights them as being immature, underage or somehow lacking or wanting.
So no coming here and asking for opinions does not "prove" that the asker is somehow too young for a sexual relationship. There are people on these forums of all ages asking for such advice and long may it continue.
Quote:
Originally Posted by imjustagirl16
i am going to talk to him once he gets home. thank you for your attempt at helping.
Good luck with that and do let us know how it goes and what comes of it. I repeat my advice not to enter such a conversation in any way that cuold be construed as confrontational, angry, competitive or accusatory. Your mission today should be to establish a line of communication - openly and from both directions. Your target should not be to confront him on porn or issue ultimatums but to try and understand what it is he feels he gets from porn - how he wants it to play a part in your relationship - and how he sees you in the relationship.
When you get this information you can tell him you need to think about this some more and then even come on here and we can discuss how to go further with it.
I have worked with many people for whom porn has been an issue in their relationship. Quite often - but not always clearly - the girl in the relationship wants the guys porn use to stop entirely. Often it is a deal breaker for her. Often however compromises can be reached and other resolutions sought when both sides understand what the other wants.
I think the biggest thing that stood out to me from your post is that you can't talk with him about this. If you can't talk about issues that come up then your relationship is doomed, porn or no porn.
Maybe if you understand his fascination and where he's coming from it will help with your feeling of inadequacy. If you love him learn to embrace the porn. If not, neither of you should be forced to change and you should find a guy who doesn't watch porn.
the name is a way to keep it so no one knows who i am. plus, i am just a girl. the 16 is a random number since imjustagirl was taken.
he has said he watched porn when he was younger because of older cousins, and he's been with a lot of females sexually. he told me when we were talking about becoming a couple, he wanted something serious because he was done with the "flings." So it may be because he's just hooked from when he was younger, it's something i'll have to bring up.
Okay, I must say I thought you were 16 which is MUCH too young to be in a sexual relationship, but 22 may or may not be depending on the people, your responses to other posters didn't help your case.
You say "he's been with a lot of females sexually", who told you this, HIM? Some guys tend to exaggerate in this area, the more they brag the bigger the lie. Guys that brag about all the women they have been with, haven't.
Dudes, like variety and this is the only way they can experience that variety without cheating.
Variety watching Porn and masturbating?? What, lefty today and righty tomorrow?
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