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So what exactly did you change about yourself? I'm curious.
I know my husband would LOVE to change some things in me, but it's not going to happen. But then I don't want to change either.
I learned how to communicate and be open and expressive. No small feat, since it always felt like a risk I wasn't willing to take. I learned why I have never trusted women enough (including my ex-wife) to be fully open. It was a really amazing transformation. Now I want nothing more than to be a GOOD husband and a father and I'm just alone and it feels too late.
I learned how to communicate and be open and expressive. No small feat, since it always felt like a risk I wasn't willing to take. I learned why I have never trusted women enough (including my ex-wife) to be fully open. It was a really amazing transformation. Now I want nothing more than to be a GOOD husband and a father and I'm just alone and it feels too late.
Hmmm, that's funny that you mention communication. What I've learned in my life is that there is such a thing at being too open. I keep a lot bottled up but there are times where I've tried to be open and honest as well. That came back and bit me in the ass!! Lesson learned.
Hmmm, that's funny that you mention communication. What I've learned in my life is that there is such a thing at being too open. I keep a lot bottled up but there are times where I've tried to be open and honest as well. That came back and bit me in the ass!! Lesson learned.
I guess what works for one doesn't for another.
I mean, who the hell knows? I don't know what women want. I always had heard they want an emotionally intelligent, good communicator. But do they? So many women are dishonest, so you never know. Hence, I'm alone. Oh yeah, it did blow up in my face in my last relationship, so screw it.
I mean, who the hell knows? I don't know what women want. I always had heard they want an emotionally intelligent, good communicator. But do they? So many women are dishonest, so you never know. Hence, I'm alone. Oh yeah, it did blow up in my face in my last relationship, so screw it.
Understand that you're probably going through the most painful period possible....period. But, you're not a victim. It is what is. Plenty of guys have been through it (trust me, I could go on and on about my ex)...the challenge is to make yourself ready, available, and healthy enough to accept the next one...
Understand that you're probably going through the most painful period possible....period. But, you're not a victim. It is what is. Plenty of guys have been through it (trust me, I could go on and on about my ex)...the challenge is to make yourself ready, available, and healthy enough to accept the next one...
That is actually some of the smartest advice, I know that every relationship will teach you something about yourself (sometimes positive and sometimes negative), but you learn from everything.
The right person will come along, and the bottom line is that you have to love yourself first then you can love someone else. Sorry that sounded like a mix between a Dr Phil episode and a hallmark card.
Some can, some won't. It's a choice and it takes effort. I've known some really horrible, evil people who have done a complete 180, and I've also known some "good" people who have gone bad.
One thing you absolutely shouldn't do is become something that someone else wants you to be or what you think they want in a partner. Do not re-invent yourself because you think that's what the crush of the week will want you to be. If you're in a long term relationship, compromise is ok when it comes to chores, responsibilities, eating out, etc., but no one should compromise WHO they are for anyone.
Because I am a idiot and I wanted to believe that things would be different, I really do need a dose of reality, if a friend of mine was in a similar situation and asked advice I would ask them "Why?"
well hey better late then never in some situations.
People do change, sometimes for the worse and occasionally for the better. As some people age they become less tollerant then others. I think abusers, alcoholics and controllers are the worst kind, and hardest to change. I am very intollerant of poor behaviour in Women I am seeing and male friends too. I usually give a person 1 chance when they exhibit very bad behavior 'A bad outburst of nastyness' would be a good example; "Fair warning, one more extreme out burst and I will be gone" and I always follow through. Of course a physical attack would garner an instant end to any relationship. It is easiest to exit stage left when the person steps over the line. Anything else would be encouraging this bad behaviour in the other person; you are helping train a future abuser.
True very true. I just wish Dr. House was a actual person, I am sad that House is over.
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