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If he was straight but HAD a girlfriend, I wouldn't mind so much. If he was single on the other hand....I don't think I'd feel the same way.
If he is gay, then single or not I'd be ok with it
But if I had a gf who was rooming with a straight single man, I would think it stinks to high heaven. I wouldn't trust the gf or her roommate. That would stink to high heaven and without trust, no relationship
If there is no relationship without trust, then why would you have a gf whom you dont trust? What type of backwards logic are you introducing here? People are so weak and insecure nowadays, that it seems most dont even deserve to be in a relationship.
There is some hope that if someone is doing their MS at MIT, they are not a screw ball.
What has the recent batman movie tragedy reminded us? Even grad students can be NUTS!
Quote:
Originally Posted by TaoistDude
It sounds like you bf doesn't really trust you. My wife lived with an ex-bf when I met her, and that continued for over a year until she and I got a place together.
In most cases though, it usually doesn't pan out so well. I wouldn't suggest anyone to get involved with anyone still living with their ex and that's from experience. Matter of fact, if one had a choice of living with a opposite (or same sex for some of us) roommate or the ex boyfriend, I would help them pack their things and move in with the roommate.
Where do you live? In the Boston area, the majority of people live with roommates until they are in their early 30s. It makes no sense not to do so.
WHAT? That's ridiculous. That's just too many years not to be on your own. I'd find it impossible to develop proper relationships. I've dated guys with a bunch of roommates, and it was just too much. They didn't seem to have any stability in their lives. Well, then again it's the east coast. It's why I'd love to live in that area or NYC, but I refuse to be piled up in an apartment with people. I'm very territorial about my space. I don't even like friend's friends coming over because I can only keep an eye on 1 person at a time and that's hard enough LOL. I'm in the mountain west. Several cities where you can live alone in this country and a decent apartment $500-700 a month. You're paying $650 to be all cramped up. I'd have a fit LOL.
However, I'm not knocking anyone's living situations and really it's not really our place to dictate where someone chooses to live. Who know's maybe the guy is gay (which is pretty common being gay myself) and is looking for a roommate, but most gay guys I know can't stand living with women so not sure if that's the case in this situation.
And besides even if he was gay, I know for a fact many of us whether 28 or 48 are not going to just spend every weekend alone without having some kind of indiscretion going on. I know of 1 gay guy who has occasional sex parties but rented his unit out to guys. One time the roommate came home, looked haggard and dishelved from a long day of work but walked into a dozen or so guys butt naked. What a way to come home!
I'm in the mountain west. Several cities where you can live alone in this country and a decent apartment $500-700 a month. You're paying $650 to be all cramped up. I'd have a fit LOL.
There is no such thing within commuting distance to Boston as even a complete piece of crap in a dangerous area for $500. There wasn't even when I lived there nearly 20 years ago.
There is no such thing within commuting distance to Boston as even a complete piece of crap in a dangerous area for $500. There wasn't even when I lived there nearly 20 years ago.
That's for sure. I may be moving back to the Boston area sometime soon, so need to look into real estate and rentals! I'm sure things have changed in the last 10 years.
1. I dated a girl that had a male roommate when I met her. They had been friends for years, and at one point he was in love with her, but nothing bad (to my knowledge) ever happened. Relationship didn't work out, but it had nothing to do with the male roommate.
2. I had a friend who's girlfriend shared an apartment with his best friend for financial reasons. He had a key to their place and let himself in one night at 2AM only to find them in bed together They blamed it on alcohol.
3. My only concern with the OP's situation is that it is a stranger and not someone that she knows and can trust.
3. My only concern with the OP's situation is that it is a stranger and not someone that she knows and can trust.
This keeps coming up. She could spend some time getting to know him better, run an internet background check on him, make sure her room door has a lock. What else? Buy a taser if it's a real concern. I think getting together with the roomie with her bf present is a great idea.
Wow, BioMech, people can't even trust their best friends! Choose your friends carefully, very carefully...
Wow, BioMech, people can't even trust their best friends! Choose your friends carefully, very carefully...
Yeah my buddy was crushed! and blamed it on the living situation, but you know if she had a cheating bone in her body she probably would have found another way to break his heart eventually. The friend just wasn't much of a friend. I was never concerned about the girl I dated having a male roommate, even one that used to adore her, because she only had eyes for me - at least until we broke up!
I've have my roommate stories, but one in particular definitely freaked me out. The guy was obsessed with my dating life, one evening he was supposedly away, turns out he wasn't, reported my every move back to me the the next day. From my leaving the subway station with my date, to our evening back at the apartment. Oh and the roommate was legally in possession of his MBA degree, so whom ever thinks that has any relevance please, a number of my male companions were and have had masters degrees and beyond and some are way crazier than I'll, I mean that guy will ever be.
I imagine there are plenty of situations were co-ed roommate off campus living arrangements work well for those that have a SO not living in, as stated by at least one or two people that were in such relationships can attest to so far. AT 25, under your circumstances, I probably would go for rooming situation if I weren't able to secure another in the allotted time. But I do understand your guys concerns, I don't see them as being insecurities. One thing guys know better than most women is the working of a guys mind innocent or not. It's one of those things why some dads go ballistic and act in ways that are incomprehensible to the yougins when their daughters first start dating; they know things many of us don't and refuse to understand. This is in the case where the guy is airing his concerns. Of course, the women are to be responsible for her actions depending upon how the situation is played out.
Just my simple minded opinion. I'm the last person to take advice from, I blew it years ago.
Last edited by TRosa; 08-02-2012 at 08:32 PM..
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They blamed it on alcohol. 
