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Yes and i made a guess, that a bad boy or a jerk would have a better chance of being more dominant in the bedroom. Do you think i was guessing wrong? Do you disagree?
Quote:
Originally Posted by OdysseusNY
i'm not even referring to the OP anymore. i put my opinion of that right on page 1 complete with citations of his contradictions
somehow i'm getting lumped in with him though despite about halfway agreeing with a lot of the female sentiment in this thread and providing an alternate perspective. even giving a friggen thumbs up
it's degenerated into the typical CD-relationship nonsense about nice guys versus bad boys and each gender calling each other clueless. Next!
The thing is - I AM referring to the OP. He's too mean. I wouldn't want to date someone who was too mean. And I wouldn't have high hopes in the bedroom for someone who was too mean either. Like I said - it's one thing to have someone who can take control and it's another thing to be with someone who doesn't give a crap about you. I would think that someone who is too mean would fall in the latter category. As for the rest of this stuff - I could care less. I know - you guys want to feel like you are kings in the bedroom. Well - sorry to say - no stranger on the internet can really help you out with that.
I think women tend to assume that any touch in that area will do the trick, like, it's all good
yes this is a common mistake
and usually the most constructive and tactful way to correct is with a slight hand correction, or shifting your weight, or adding some lube to the mix, or whatever
often stopping things for a q/a will just embarrass the woman. or at least delay the mood
there's a time and place for asking, often it's not during the act
Ruth, we may disagree often, but i like and respect you. Do you see the irony in the bolded part? Do you realize that if men did not go around propositioning women our civilization would cease to exist?
um...misunderstanding, maybe? I meant, propositioning strangers, or near-strangers, or casual friends. (i.e. people one isn't dating, like in the OP's case) I thought women took the lead on this, anyway, via signals, at least, if not making the first move overtly. Propositioning usually isn't necessary, is it? Oh well. Never mind. I'll go back to my own planet now... :s
The thing is - I AM referring to the OP. He's too mean. I wouldn't want to date someone who was too mean. And I wouldn't have high hopes in the bedroom for someone who was too mean either. Like I said - it's one thing to have someone who can take control and it's another thing to be with someone who doesn't give a crap about you. I would think that someone who is too mean would fall in the latter category. As for the rest of this stuff - I could care less. I know - you guys want to feel like you are kings in the bedroom. Well - sorry to say - no stranger on the internet can really help you out with that.
It doesnt matter if he is too mean or too nice. The only thing that matters is sexual attraction and it's either there or it isnt. Its not like its a conscious choice or anything. "oh, he is too mean. I just wont be sexualy attracted to him then".
It doesnt matter if he is too mean or too nice. The only thing that matters is sexual attraction and it's either there or it isnt. Its not like its a conscious choice or anything. "oh, he is too mean. I just wont be sexualy attracted to him then".
Maybe for some people - but if I don't like someone's personality - I'm not sexually attracted to them. That's how I work.
But she says she has feelings for me. What should i do next in order to have sex with her? Should I just be more aggressive, because obviously she is attracted to me, she just won't date me.
but neither is asking. people lie/exaggerate/are secretive all the time
as you pointed out with the thing about lube
so why the hell would i 100% rely on asking, either?
like any mature adult i use either approach (and others) as appropriate and constructive
and if i don't need to ask i don't bother
Asking, observing, AND having basic knowledge are skills required in life period to be successful at anything --be it work, sports, sex, or a relationship.
I never said 100% rely on asking questions--and to be quite honest I have a feeling you already know this. But, perhaps you truly did not read my post clearly. I incorporate asking questions (listening to others), observation, AND common knowledge to reach my maximum potential (best) in any situation. Who'da thunk you could use all three? If someone lies, that has nothing to do with me. I get a huge satisfaction out of life knowing that I put my best foot forward in whatever I do. If it's not good enough for someone else be it a boss, boyfriend, acquaintance, whatever, there is no self esteem loss or hard feelings. I walk away with the knowledge that I can't please everyone even when giving it my all. The same core lessons I will teach a child. But I am sure not going to not ask questions bc some people lie. You can never make it to the top of anything with that attitude.
Needless to say no point in going back and forth--at this point its getting to a level of needing to be right and Im not about that. Again agree to disagree. I've moved on from this discussion.
If you've got it all figured out - why are you asking our advice? I mean - if you are so irresistible that women are throwing themselves at you, even married women, then why are you spending your time asking questions on CDF?
Because they're not. They're telling him he's not bf material, while (allegedly) telling him they have "feelings" for him. I'd say, possible creeped-out feelings. Whatever.
Actually - I thought it was awesome that I had slept with more people than my friends when I was younger. Then I met my husband and they were all still single so they passed me way up. I don't think I've ever been afraid of being thought of as a ****. Maybe because I know I'm not one. And even if I had slept with a lot more people - I still wouldn't have been one.
This is true. Nobody cares. And who's paying attention, anyway? Who would even know? It's not the 1950's anymore. In fact, it hasn't been the 1950's for 60 years. Society has moved on. Except for in very conservative communities, maybe, who pride themselves in keeping the 50's alive.
This is true. Nobody cares. And who's paying attention, anyway? Who would even know? It's not the 1950's anymore. In fact, it hasn't been the 1950's for 60 years. Society has moved on. Except for in very conservative communities, maybe, who pride themselves in keeping the 50's alive.
The only people who know how many guys I've been with are my closest girlfriends and the guys I've been with. Who else would even care?
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