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Basically he shares the same goals, values, morals and lifestyles as me. I also prefer someone who has some of my favorite activities as well. The guy I like actually does share my values, morals, etc and we are involved in many of the same things.
Compatible men:
childless
religious preferably Catholic
same values
Incompatible men:
guys with several baby mamas or divorced dads
non religious or atheists
sleep around
sitting around all day everyday eating and no other hobbies
thinks because I am a woman I am expected to cater to him. Nope we cater to each other and we should be submissive to each other not just me to him.
Compatibility is insanely important for a successful marriage. Though it's true that "opposites attract," long-term marriages generally aren't between these types of couples. Of course there are exceptions to this rule.
What does compatible mean to me? Having a lot in common. Sharing the same tastes in music and movies. Enjoying the same actvities away from work. Having similar political views. I can't imagine being a liberal Democrat and marrying a Christian bedrock Conservative. Even simple things like both being morning people (or night people). Both enjoying to travel or not to travel. Both being religious or not religious, but compatibility in that area is huge. Having pets or loving animals (or not loving animals) is something else significant. I'd never be with a man who hunts or who doesn't respect/love animals.
Being completely comfy with one another. Being able to be alone in a car for a 2 week vacation driving 500+ miles a day and always having something to talk about. Enjoying spending time together after work.
If you're dating and have little to say to one another... forget about marriage. Or if you get into a car and immediately turn on the radio, forget it! (Indicates you have nothing to talk about together and the music fills the void). Or if you sit around and fill your evenings watching TV and never talking, you'll have problems or one hell of a boring marriage.
Being compatible with someone is not rocket science. It's no different between married people or your friends. Think of the people you hang around with and who are your friends: you're probably compatible with them, enjoy the same things, have similar senses of humor and just enjoy hanging out. Marriage is the same thing except with sex thrown in.
Hmmm, I can honestly say, in my 20's I still wanted someone who shared the same core beliefs as me. There were other things that were important at the time but marriage itself has revealed how that one "requirement" has been the cure for other areas that seemed impossible!
Compatibility to me means:
having intellectual curiosity
having similar core social beliefs (I am socially liberal, if you have a problem with birth control, abortion, gay people, and having diverse friends: we have a problem)
having some shared interests (enough in common so we can have some shared pursuits)
having a somewhat adventurous food palate (if you are afraid of trying new ethnic foods, it isn't going to work out)
having similar philosophies on relationships and families
most importantly: being able to enjoy comfortable conversations and comfortable silences
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,029,399 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Djuna
Compatible to me means several things. I have to have certain qualities and life views in a partner. Being an atheist I prefer someone who is also atheist or at the very least totally non religious. They have to have an irreverent view of the world, a quirky somewhat dry sense of humour and not take any of this very seriously. They have to "get" me. I'm weird, I have some issues, I'm a bit radical, they have to really understand what makes me tick. I have met quite a few people, both men and women who I have felt very compatible with so I know I'm not the only odd person in the world
Tbh Djuna from some of your posts you seem to take things very seriously/blow your top a bit. Just an observation.
having a somewhat adventurous food palate (if you are afraid of trying new ethnic foods, it isn't going to work out)
This one made me laugh.
No wonder I don't hang with people who like Thai, Indian, Vietnamese and/or Ethiopian food. I've been borderline accused of being uncool. Bring on the pasta, or steak & potatoes.
No wonder I don't hang with people who like Thai, Indian, Vietnamese and/or Ethiopian food. I've been borderline accused of being uncool. Bring on the pasta, or steak & potatoes.
LOL! It is almost a pre-requisite to be in my social circle. My friend married a meat and potatoes guy like you. He is adjusting. He likes Korean food now. They have a lot of beer and cheese parties.
Most of my friends are all about eating random ethnic food. Personally, I can handle pretty much any spice, but don't try to feed me tongue, intestines, livers, pate, brains, or chicken feet. But if you want to braise some chicken, beef, lamb or fish in any medley of spices, I am game.
I grew up eating rice as the starch of choice, so I gravitate to cuisines that also use rice. Have you had Persian or Afghan? These are great for the meat and potatoes types. It is basically meat and rice!
*** it won't work out for me, because I tend to cook "international" flavors.
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,029,399 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by jade408
LOL! It is almost a pre-requisite to be in my social circle. My friend married a meat and potatoes guy like you. He is adjusting. He likes Korean food now. They have a lot of beer and cheese parties.
Most of my friends are all about eating random ethnic food. Personally, I can handle pretty much any spice, but don't try to feed me tongue, intestines, livers, pate, brains, or chicken feet. But if you want to braise some chicken, beef, lamb or fish in any medley of spices, I am game.
I grew up eating rice as the starch of choice, so I gravitate to cuisines that also use rice. Have you had Persian or Afghan? These are great for the meat and potatoes types. It is basically meat and rice!
*** it won't work out for me, because I tend to cook "international" flavors.
We were friends with a Persian family and the lady invited us for dinner once, cooked some really delicious dishes, I would say Persian food can be quite spicy/full of herbs actually.
We were friends with a Persian family and the lady invited us for dinner once, cooked some really delicious dishes, I would say Persian food can be quite spicy/full of herbs actually.
I think the flavors of Persian/Afghan food can be pretty accessible for pickier eaters or people with simpler palates. Well besides the "sour" and "bitter."
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They have a lot of beer and cheese parties. 
