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Old 09-10-2012, 04:39 AM
 
359 posts, read 736,008 times
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I don't understand why a woman would ever chat with someone from a dating site, then agree to meet them. How do they know this person well enough that they are willing to put their lives in danger to go meet a strange person?
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Old 09-10-2012, 04:41 AM
 
Location: Up in the air
19,126 posts, read 25,784,820 times
Reputation: 16226
Quote:
Originally Posted by bson1257 View Post
I don't understand why a woman would ever chat with someone from a dating site, then agree to meet them. How do they know this person well enough that they are willing to put their lives in danger to go meet a strange person?
You drive yourself to the meeting place, meet in a VERY public place (coffee shop, bookstore etc.) and tell at least 2 people who you are with and where you are meeting. I also give them the guys phone number just in case.
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Old 09-10-2012, 04:45 AM
 
Location: N of citrus, S of decent corn
34,530 posts, read 42,694,765 times
Reputation: 57174
My friend met a very nice man this way. She communicated A LOT by email, then had many phone conversations, and only then met in a public place. You can tell a lot about a person if you do a lot of talking. I think about two men dropped away before the actual meeting.
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Old 09-10-2012, 04:50 AM
 
359 posts, read 736,008 times
Reputation: 564
I just always assumed that women would think every guy using a dating site was a creep or a pedo
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Old 09-10-2012, 05:13 AM
 
1,752 posts, read 3,148,459 times
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I meet strangers every day, every where, in much less safe circumstances than when I meet people via online dating. I meet only in public, only use my cell phone, and I Google the men I'm meeting to make sure their story checks out. Only 2x have I met men who had the potential to be dangerous, (that was way back in the beginning of my online dating experiences) and it was simple enough to block their calls. They didn't know my last name or where I lived.

Put it this way, if it were so dangerous, it wouldn't have become the number one way to meet a spouse.
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Old 09-10-2012, 05:35 AM
 
13,007 posts, read 12,434,284 times
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Any guy you meet through regular channels could be "a creep or a pedo." It's much easier to vet someone through online dating than if you just met them out and about, in my opinion. You can take the time to review their profiles and communications for consistency. Profiles are rather static (and you can often see when they've been changed), so there is less chance of them "conforming" themselves to what they perceive you want. I don't date anyone who hasn't created a fairly full and informative profile.

Also you can just take basic safety measures, as JetJockey pointed out.

I've had friends who have had bad (even terrifying) experiences, but I really do think that's just because they're looking for a particular type: The successful Christian yuppie guy. If a man is going to "pose" as anything, it's that. On the other hand, I'm rather unusual in what I'm looking for - no one's going to pretend to be the kind of guy I want.

I've met guys while I was out socializing, and I've been "set up" with guys by friends/family. None of those have turned into anything other than single-date experiences. In fact, I've found more "fakery" in those experiences than in my online dating experiences.
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Old 09-10-2012, 05:53 AM
 
Location: Sugarland
13,228 posts, read 11,754,597 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bson1257 View Post
I just always assumed that women would think every guy using a dating site was a creep or a pedo
I don't assume that unless someone gives me a reason to assume that. I've met over 30 guys and never had a problem.
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Old 09-10-2012, 06:02 AM
 
Location: Wonderland
40,879 posts, read 32,642,286 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar View Post
I don't assume that unless someone gives me a reason to assume that. I've met over 30 guys and never had a problem.
Right on.

When I was single, I used match.com and had more dates - with mostly nice guys - than I knew what to do with! And I was in my forties!

I didn't click with a lot of them after the first date, but that was OK -they didn't know where I lived, and like many people have pointed out, we met in public places and drove ourselves there. I can honestly say that in all my online dating experiences, I never ONCE met a man who wasn't exactly who he said he was. Now - I did meet men who I didn't share chemistry or common values with - and this became apparent quickly, so little time was wasted by either of us. No harm done.

But I met a lot of interesting people - and then I met my husband, who blew my mind! We have been happily married for seven years.
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Old 09-10-2012, 06:07 AM
 
634 posts, read 576,455 times
Reputation: 394
Quote:
Originally Posted by bson1257 View Post
I just always assumed that women would think every guy using a dating site was a creep or a pedo
Precisely the reason why I stayed away from dating sites as long as I can. Which I regret coz my dating life became active when I went to dating sites. I've encountered a few pervs but I just learn from it to be more extra careful than i already am.

I dont give my number to them if I have not even met them and of course meet in public place plus knowing how to take care of yourself is always important.
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Old 09-10-2012, 06:08 AM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,683 posts, read 43,116,816 times
Reputation: 11862
Amazing for some to believe, most people who use online dating are just ordinary people.
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