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WTF?!?! So many posts saying that she needs to give up on him...?!?
If any girlfriend of mine ever said that I need to drop my female friends for her, she is getting booted out the front door sooner than it takes to post this reply!
If they are ONLY friends then you are far too insecure and you need to keep your emotions in check. He has a right to have friends, girls or guys, as do you! You should not expect him to drop his friends because he is now dating you.
Now, if they are "more" than friends, that is a different story all together... and you need to get rid of him if he doesn't stop.
My advice is predicated on the assumption that she's not a total lunatic. I've got a lot of guy friends, but there's nothing remotely salacious about our texting. The OP's distraught tone makes this sound like there is a lot more being exchanged than just "Hey how are you?"
My advice is predicated on the assumption that she's not a total lunatic. I've got a lot of guy friends, but there's nothing remotely salacious about our texting. The OP's distraught tone makes this sound like there is a lot more being exchanged than just "Hey how are you?"
Thats exactly how I read it too. She didn't say he is texting his female bff to chat about current events.
If it is a platonic friendship, then of course it is not a big deal. Somehow, I get the feeling he is being flirty through text.
Either way, just the appearance if inappropriate behavior can kill trust too. If it is innocent, but he spends his time with his gf texting other women, even if they are just friends, it may say a lot.
As Sade sings, "love is stronger than pride." It seems that if youre still hanging in there, hoping to change him, yours must be too. If unlike most young hormonal men, he was actually ready to settle down and focus on just one woman, he would not have as much time or interest in texting/sexting others, if that is truly the case, in that he isnt just enjoying chatting with a relative or platonic buddy. Even so, such an innocent act should at least be set aside in favor of quality time spent with you. But that might be asking for more maturity than he has at 21. I hope you can get past the infatuation and try not to judge him as a jerk, but just as someone who would make a better friend than mate for now.
Yes, The first question to ask as opposed to assuming right away. They may be friends, friendly ex's who just text here and there or co-workers. However when spending time with the SO it is best to leave the texting for later if it is going to be a back and forth 20 minute text tag thing. A quick one responding after some relationship has been established is not overboard.
This is a strong habit that some people develop. A person either has the habit or doesn't. If your BF has it, you can't stop it, I'm sorry. There is nothing you can do. You either have to dump him or accept it, but he will not change. Personally, I recommend dumping him because you haven't been going out for long so it'll be easier to move on and find someone more compatible.
Thanks guys for all your responses. Turned out to be more than just texting, there was a lot more going on. I decided to end the relationship but he's been bugging me, asking me to take him back. But I'm done wit him.
Thanks guys for all your responses. Turned out to be more than just texting, there was a lot more going on. I decided to end the relationship but he's been bugging me, asking me to take him back. But I'm done wit him.
Hold that thought as long as you can--his ego was getting off on this whole scenario.
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it's simple but is a great measure of a relationship.
I decided to end the relationship but he's been bugging me, asking me to take him back. But I'm done wit him.
