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Dating a smoker for a non smoker is hard. Most non smokers HATE the smell that cigarettes give off.
And it seems most smokers know they shouldnt smoke, so they are self conscience about it. Which compounds thjngs.
I have never thought of a smoker to be 'more worldly'. And I have never looked at a woman with a smoke and thought she was more attractive because she smoked. Ever.
I guess if you are a smoker it is different, but I never understood smoking at all.
I think only smokers find other smokers attractive, as they can both smoke and not feel self conscience about it.
Funny thing is, I know a bunch of smokers that find smoking to be a deal breaker in a potential relationship, even though they themselves are a social or 3 pack a week smoker.
It would seem that a majority of people would not date a smoker. That leads me to believe that either City-Data posters by and large don't like smoking and represent a small portion of the dating world, OR that the majority is just full-o-crap. Reason being, I see plenty of "shiny happy people" out there that smoke, who date non-smokers.
Like I said earlier in the thread I used to smoke, and it took me a long time to quit. So my biggest fear about dating a smoker now is that I would start back up just from being around her smoking. Best I just try to avoid that if at all possible.
i don't think i smoke enough to qualify as a smoker(2 packs or less a year)...but i do enjoy the occasional cigarette when i've been drinking. i wouldn't mind if they were a smoker, unless they smoke like a damn chimney.
on the other hand, if they smoked marijuana(on occasion), that would be a huge turn-on for me
Like I said earlier in the thread I used to smoke, and it took me a long time to quit. So my biggest fear about dating a smoker now is that I would start back up just from being around her smoking. Best I just try to avoid that if at all possible.
As far as affecting others negatively? I try to be thoughtful of others, not as a smoker, but as a person in general. This would include not throwing my butts out the window of my car { HATE that, it's littering and has the risk of fire } not blowing it directly into someone elses personal space, not smoking around children, etc. etc. However, when in a bar, I'm not all that concerned about someone being offended that I'm smoking a Cig. You are going out on your own accord, to a venue you know will likely be smoke filled, so your just going to have to put up with it if you want to patronize that business. It's like wanting to walk down the freeway and getting upset that cars are traveling so fast. There is a smoking ban in my state, but many bars still allow smoking anyway by paying off the health department. Those are pretty much the only places I go. I gave up a few of my favorite spots because they gave in to the draconian law.
I hate the littering too. I don't know why people do it. I recently called the cops on two guys in van for throwing a coffee cup out the window. I agree that there are places fitting for cigs, like bars. The issue I'm thinking of is this ren fair I attended last weekend. Normally smoke doesn't bother me, but I'm currently in a delicate condition where the nausea sets in. My dh went to the bathroom area and I went to wait for him. There was a group smoking. I thought that was actually a good area for people to light up and it's unfortunate they weren't confined to that area. It made me nauseous so I backed up. Then I ran into another small group smoking and bam. I ended up jogging around the event area looking for space to avoid the smell. I almost added my own unpleasantness to the situation. Fortunately, my reaction to it will not last forever, but as it stands right now it's difficult to tolerate.
It sounds like a great reduction tool, but I'm not meaning using it f/t, rather only when others are exposed to it. I imagine it would be good for airports and planes, hospitals, and other venues that don't allow for smoke at all.
I used the nicotine tablets in those situations. Helped bunches. Now I use them ALL the time because I quit. It really helps with withdrawls.
It's not about those who wouldn't date a smoker. Thats fine. We all have our likes and dislikes. Some guys wouldn't date a "heavy" girl and instead opt for the model type. Should they be judged poorly because of that preferance? No, they like what they like. It's the same with smoking. You don't like it? Thats fine, I understand, but why do you have to have such a negative and judgemental attitude towards it? Like you are somehow "better" than them as a person or something? You're not, so I'd suggest you change your way of thinking. We all make choices, some good, some bad, but in the end, we are all people.
Welcome to the real world.
People are going to judge and have negative opinions about others no matter what. It's in our nature. People will judge you for being fat, skinny, rich or poor etc. etc.
Every adult has made negative assumptions about others. Everyone. People may claim that they don't judge others, but that's a lie.
Don't get mad because people are doing what comes natural to them.
There is a lot more awareness now about harmful affects of smoking, maybe because of the internet & high healthcare costs. Its seen as a high maintenance habit for a lot of people. The hatred comes from thinking how could smokers be so irresponsible to play with their life dangerously. The facts are out there & nobody can ignore it or justify that smoking is good for you in any way. People dont understand its a very addictive habit & difficult to give up. Maybe someone who sees other great qualities in you will ignore this one habit.
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Fortunately, my reaction to it will not last forever, but as it stands right now it's difficult to tolerate.
