Do I have to many relationship requirements? (dating, women, attracted)
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As I've been dating over the years I came to the conclusion that I require 4 things in a prospect. One that she has intelligence, two she has goals and is working towards them, three she has a great sense of humor, and four she has to be attractive TO ME..... Is that really too much to ask for?
As I've been dating over the years I came to the conclusion that I require 4 things in a prospect. One that she has intelligence, two she has goals and is working towards them, three she has a great sense of humor, and four she has to be attractive TO ME..... Is that really too much to ask for?
As long as you don't judge her goals negatively, I don't think you're asking for much at all.
As long as you don't judge her goals negatively, I don't think you're asking for much at all.
Im all for most goals. But it seems like I only come across two types of women and NEITHER of those types I can never seem to have relationships or even long term dating with...
Im all for most goals. But it seems like I only come across two types of women and NEITHER of those types I can never seem to have relationships or even long term dating with...
Where I reside could be the problem. The job market here is probably the best in the country unfortunately. Ive tried all sorts of way of meeting women. online dating, meetups, clubs, book stores ect...... none of it seems to be working out too well. And with online dating it just seems like im wasting money and the women dont seem to be attracted to me. Up until recently I thought I was an OK looking guy, but apparently not.
Where I reside could be the problem. The job market here is probably the best in the country unfortunately. Ive tried all sorts of way of meeting women. online dating, meetups, clubs, book stores ect...... none of it seems to be working out too well. And with online dating it just seems like im wasting money and the women dont seem to be attracted to me. Up until recently I thought I was an OK looking guy, but apparently not.
I've watched a handful of people do online dating. It appears to be similar to online shopping... there are unlimited prospects and everyone has this heightened expectation of finding exactly what they want... neatly packaged with the best price. Converting that to human terms, I suspect a lot of people are looking for that mythological click, rather than the flesh and blood that people really are. I suspect there's also a shorter attention span because of the endless mythical fruit finding in which they can engage if they turn their attention from an acceptable, but real prospect. It's just a totally different ballgame. But people aren't accessories; they're to be met and understood on their own terms, not through some voyeuristically selective lens. Essentially, what I'm saying is that unless these people have spent quality time getting to know you, a quick rejection is nothing more than a reflection of a gut reaction. As you mentioned, there is more to the gut reaction than appearance. And meeting people online is just different from making your initial contacts in the flesh in real, present time. Because you and they have no way of knowing if there is real potential there, you collectively put yourself in a boiler plate situation in which rejection is not just possible, but likely, in a way that it wasn't with traditional dating. I think, with online dating, you just have to take it less personally than any other form of meeting and dating people.
Your list of must-haves does not seem at all unreasonable to me. In fact, I bet you have a few qualities you would add to that list if you were going to make it exhaustive. Nonetheless, it's always hard to find that person that you can be compatible with for a long period of time. Everyone has a long list of unique interests, needs, and priorities and finding someone whose nuances interlock with yours is a worthy challenge. It could take years, months, or weeks. In the meantime, though, try not to let the inertia of speed dating get you down. It's hardly real. Until it's Real, of course.
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