Consider what you're putting in your profile...

[TheEarthBeneathMe]

Originally Posted by JrzDefector

Totally amused right now. Just got a miffed email via the dating web site from a guy whose initial email I had not responded to. I responded to this one and pointed out that I was well-acquainted with the writer he had alluded to in his personal description (co-opting a quote describing the man). Said writer was known for his philandering, emotional instability, addictions and general narcissism. Would-be suitor was unmollified by my explanation.

My advice is just to think about the image you are conveying in your profile. And don't take offense when people take you at your word (or someone else's co-opted words, LOL).

So he had a quote from an author that he thought described a specific aspect of himself?

Did he intend the comparison to extend to the authors love life? Maybe he thought the similarities were between some other aspect (like disposition?)...

What if the author also had webbed feet...would you assume "you compare yourself to him, he had webbed feet, so you must have them too!"

I obviously havent read his profile, but i kind of sympathize with the guys with "poor" profiles.

Some nice people have stupid or bare profiles. A ten minute conversation would give you a better indication, i imagine..

Sent from my SPH-L710 using Tapatalk 2

[JrzDefector]

Originally Posted by TheEarthBeneathMe

So he had a quote from an author that he thought described a specific aspect of himself?

Did he intend the comparison to extend to the authors love life? Maybe he thought the similarities were between some other aspect (like disposition?)...

What if the author also had webbed feet...would you assume "you compare yourself to him, he had webbed feet, so you must have them too!"

I obviously havent read his profile, but i kind of sympathize with the guys with "poor" profiles.

Some nice people have stupid or bare profiles. A ten minute conversation would give you a better indication, i imagine..

Sent from my SPH-L710 using Tapatalk 2

Let's just say he was working a little to hard to convey a "bad boy" image of himself, between the quote, his other "essay" answers and his personal questions. He was very clearly trying to draw a parallel between his personality and this particular writer. I don't have time for prima donnas or guys who think they're special because they're "artists." The very fact that he was irritable because I didn't respond to his email indicates that the dude's got some issues.

[TabulaRasa]

Originally Posted by JrzDefector

Obviously, I need to maintain the secrecy of my superhero identity.

A good 50 percent of my emails are from a 20-somethings who are looking for NSA with an older woman. About 25 percent are from guys who are respectful but utterly not compatible. About 25 percent are from pretty decent guys who I'd like to go on a date with.

This is my observation as well. Such a rash of midtwenties guys who seem to have watched a lot of nighttime programming and think that all women in their thirties are cougars/will be so glad for the attention of young studs that the NSA will be there ripe for the picking. No judgment, NSA works for some people. But if I know it's not how I wanna spend my time, then, no, I'm not gonna respond.

Also, if I get messages from guys who have not filled out profiles, sorry, but they go into the trash unanswered. It's not because I take people completely at face value and consider their profile information to be definitive truth or anything silly like that, and while there is much you can tell about someone based on how they've written their profile, there's also much you can't. I just don't bother, because to me, it's a signifier that they don't want to put any effort in...even the limited amount of effort needed to compose a basic profile. That's not the most ringing endorsement. I'm more likely to respond to a guy who has a well-written profile but no pic than I am a guy, with or without a pic, who posts no information in his profile. It's just lazy, and makes you look like somebody who just expects stuff to come to him without having to do much. That may or may not be true, but if that's how it looks, it's worth bearing in mind.

[JrzDefector]

Originally Posted by tabularasa

this is my observation as well. Such a rash of midtwenties guys who seem to have watched a lot of nighttime programming and think that all women in their thirties are cougars/will be so glad for the attention of young studs that the nsa will be there ripe for the picking. No judgment, nsa works for some people. But if i know it's not how i wanna spend my time, then, no, i'm not gonna respond.

Also, if i get messages from guys who have not filled out profiles, sorry, but they go into the trash unanswered. It's not because i take people completely at face value and consider their profile information to be definitive truth or anything silly like that, and while there is much you can tell about someone based on how they've written their profile, there's also much you can't. I just don't bother, because to me, it's a signifier that they don't want to put any effort in...even the limited amount of effort needed to compose a basic profile. That's not the most ringing endorsement. I'm more likely to respond to a guy who has a well-written profile but no pic than i am a guy, with or without a pic, who posts no information in his profile. It's just lazy, and makes you look like somebody who just expects stuff to come to him without having to do much. That may or may not be true, but if that's how it looks, it's worth bearing in mind.

totally!