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Back in college, I had a near-miss via online. I was a member of an online music community with forums, music reviews, etc. Ended up having a lot of back and forth with a guy in Canada. We liked the same music. Compared notes. Eventually we were email and chat pals, and wrote almost daily (remember those days in your teens/young adulthood where you god chat/talk/write about nonsense for hours on end). He wrote me poems and stuff. We exchanged mix tapes and even some gifts (music posters!). This went on for like 2 years, I was thinking things were "friendly."
At some point he was trying to up the ante, exchanging pics (this was back in the days of scanners...., pre digital cameras so getting a digital pic was effort) ....thinking about meeting and stuff. Then I was preoccupied with a classmate, stopped writing as much...and eventually he sent me a pic with him and his girlfriend. Hahahah.
(Still have the mix tapes! They were awesome. )
I thought about him not long ago, because he was also a music producer. And one of his friends was featured on a song I like. I wondered what happened to him, and if he was still producing.
Do I think it can happen? Absolutely. But there are a lot of challenges to make it work, especially if you don't make an effort to go to the face to face stage.
This is another component to the internet thing. Finding someone and not following through leaves you with a case of the what ifs. FB stalk him.
I'm sure there are some strong opinions on this subject, but I'd like to know, specifically, why people think it's not possible. Is it that physical trumps personality?
And if it's not possible, what are those feelings that one gets when they "meet" someone over the net? Are those not the same feelings one gets after a good first date? What's the difference?
Have you ever found yourself in this situation?
I definitely think it's possible, I have a friend who met and married a guy from another state. 5 years later and they have a family and are still together.
I guess it depends on your personality. I don't think it's possible for some people, myself included. I'm just the type that likes to see a person face to face and interact with them in real life if it's got romantic undertones. I've met some nice people online, but I like dates where we go do things, not just sit around and talk. Hiking, exploring the city, going to a game, on a road trip, walking the dog, canoeing, camping, shooting, etc are all important things to me that I would like to share with a person I love (or like romantically). Which is why I don't think falling in love online would really work for me or would happen.
If I met someone online who I had that "feeling" about, I would still just consider it a friendship. IMO, it would take a physical presence to turn it into something more. I certainly wouldn't throw away any real life opportunities for an online friend. Kissing, hand holding, hugging, cuddling, everyday life activities done together, etc are all extremely important to me in a romance.
Quote:
Originally Posted by srjth
The main thing is that long-distance relationships suck.
I definitely think it's possible, I have a friend who met and married a guy from another state. 5 years later and they have a family and are still together.
I guess it depends on your personality. I don't think it's possible for some people, myself included. I'm just the type that likes to see a person face to face and interact with them in real life if it's got romantic undertones. I've met some nice people online, but I like dates where we go do things, not just sit around and talk. Hiking, exploring the city, going to a game, on a road trip, walking the dog, canoeing, camping, shooting, etc are all important things to me that I would like to share with a person I love (or like romantically). Which is why I don't think falling in love online would really work for me or would happen.
If I met someone online who I had that "feeling" about, I would still just consider it a friendship. IMO, it would take a physical presence to turn it into something more. I certainly wouldn't throw away any real life opportunities for an online friend. Kissing, hand holding, hugging, cuddling, everyday life activities done together, etc are all extremely important to me in a romance.
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Maybe it's about believing in the possibility just as much as finding the right person.
I had a friend who met a man from London on the net and, without ever meeting, he proposed. They've been together for about 10 years last I heard. She moved. I guess it happens.
This is another component to the internet thing. Finding someone and not following through leaves you with a case of the what ifs. FB stalk him.
Haha! He should stalk me. His name is really common. My name on the other hand, or well spelling is ridiculously uncommon so I come up on the first page if you search for my first name.
I'm sure there are some strong opinions on this subject, but I'd like to know, specifically, why people think it's not possible. Is it that physical trumps personality?
And if it's not possible, what are those feelings that one gets when they "meet" someone over the net? Are those not the same feelings one gets after a good first date? What's the difference?
Have you ever found yourself in this situation?
I have heard too many things like, 'everyone lies in their profile', 'It is not a female-it's a dude'...!
I detest liars so I would not really even consider trying...
Quote:
Originally Posted by srjth
The main thing is that long-distance relationships suck.
Long distance phone only, definitely... You need a lot of time and money to have a shot...
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